[Author's Notes: This story is dedicated to a co-worker. Chad, if you ever happen to read this (which I seriously doubt) and figure out that you're the one I'm writing about, please don't hate me for the fantasy and please continue to be friends with me. It's just a fantasy that will never be acted out in our very happy yet separate, monogamous, straight lives with our own families. I know that we would both be devastated if the events described early in this story really happened; however, if they did, maybe this could be the story of how we become more than just friends as we rebuild our lives. For the rest of you reading this story, I apologize in advance for letting you know that this is a fantasy, since knowing this seems to destroy the story for some. But no matter who you are, my hope is that you will get drawn into the twists and turns of the story and completely forget about this particular paragraph.]
I started with a mid-Atlantic company a few years ago. The company was small but growing enough each year that management finally had the resources and the need to build a new building. Unfortunately, in the move from the old building to the new building, all of us workers got demoted from our own quiet offices to some spot in a noisy cube farm. None of us liked the situation, but it was either put up with it or leave.
Shortly after we moved into our new building, Chad was hired by the manager of a nearby group. Although he sat only a row away from me, I never heard him in the office noise. He seemed to be quiet and shy. I noticed that he was a good worker: he was in on time each day (if not early), took a short lunch, and left work only after he had put in a full day. This was quite unlike a number of other people in the office, and I respected him for it. I also noticed one other thing: Chad was really good looking. He was one of those rare people whose face was perfectly formed and symmetrical, with a good jaw line for a nice-looking, rectangular front and side view, and with well-groomed, short brown hair that made him look athletic. He always wore loose clothing so I couldn’t really figure out what his body was like; however, I could tell that he had some fairly well developed shoulders under all that clothing. Although I could never get an accurate measurement, he seemed to be just under 6 feet tall, because his eyes were a little lower than mine if we stood to discuss something. To me, no matter which way you looked at Chad, he was just downright good looking.
Chad was also approachable and you could easily start a conversation with him. He also had a good sense of humor, but I quickly discovered that the humor wasn’t his second best feature: Chad’s second best feature was a bright “megawatt” smile that either made you weak in the knees or insanely jealous. Unfortunately for me, it was the former rather than the latter.
So how did I collect all these impressions about Chad? It was the only reason why I ever liked cube farms: when we moved in, Chad’s cube wasn’t quite finished so I got to catch glimpses of him whenever I went anywhere else in the building. As with every good situation, however, they finally finished Chad’s cube, so I didn’t get to see as much of him as I would have liked to. Damn cube farms.
As time went on, Chad became more involved with the people around his cube. I heard him every now and then, and I liked knowing that he was becoming popular. Of course, with his good looks and affable demeanor, he couldn’t help but be popular. Everyone liked Chad, and he genuinely seemed to like everyone else. He wasn’t a stuck-up snot like some of the other good looking (and not so good looking) men and women that I had to work with. Over a number of months, I got to work with Chad on a few projects, unfortunately not on a regular basis, but enough that I could get a better look at him. During our project working sessions, I noticed Chad’s eyes were a medium to dark blue depending on what he wore. They made me nervous and jittery, and I had to work pretty hard to control my reactions. Needless to say, I seemed to lose my concentration when working with Chad. I always hoped that I wouldn’t embarrass myself around him, but I’m sure there were some times when he thought my brain must have been scrambled or something close to that.
As part of a group from the office, we played some golf together. He was damn good, and when he got his slice under control, he put a large number of people to shame. Unfortunately for me, I was never much competition. Although I tried to keep myself from doing so, I was also able to observe Chad’s body during these games. He wasn’t flabby or anything like that, but obviously he didn’t work out and that made it easier on me. I didn’t work out either and it showed. I had loved life and life had rewarded me with a spare tire around the middle. The image I saw in the mirror always made me wish that I had turned down that extra slice of pizza and that second (or third) beer.
I wish I could have thought of Chad in a different manner but I seemed to be hooked on him from day one. He was one of those very few with good looks and who was also personable, genuinely interested in other people, and had a good sense of humor. In short, he was the complete package. He was one of the very few guys that got put on my “short list.” Being on my short list meant that, even though I was happily married, I’d jump into bed with him if he offered. Up to this point in my life, I had always thought of myself as straight, but with a few kinks, and Chad seemed to bring out that kinky side a little more each day. Unfortunately, about a year later, Chad got married, so I sadly had to remove him from the list because I knew it could never happen. I guess my list was destined to have only the two actors and one actress that had been on it before Chad came along.
Life continued rocking along as happily as it always had. My hair was beginning to turn a silvery gray around the temples and my wife was ever so jealous. She had always said that men got more distinguished and better looking with age. To her credit, however, she wasn’t aging at all. Into our early forties, her face had no wrinkles or lines and she kept herself in good shape, except for those few extra pounds she couldn’t get rid of after having two kids. We were set for the rest of our lives together. Unfortunately, I didn’t know how short our time together would really be.
One relatively warm April evening I was driving home from work wondering why the traffic in our section of the suburbs had been such a problem. Driving up to my house, I noticed a state trooper’s car parked in front. As I drove into the driveway, a couple of troopers got out of the car. To make a long story short, I found out from them that I was “suddenly single.” A drunk dump truck driver had fallen asleep, run a red light and taken out several cars. Unfortunately, my family was in the first car to be hit. Apparently none of them had suffered because of the force of the impact.
From that point forward, my emotions ran wild through hurt, pain, anger, despair, and, finally, loneliness. Life had become a disorienting mess. It was as if I had been transported to a part of the country I didn’t know, where everything was covered in a constant fog. There’s a little light but everything was still cold, damp, and not quite visible. And now I had to function without the lover, companion, and family that had been with me for the last fourteen years.
About a month after this ordeal began, Chad dropped by my cube, leaned in and said “Sorry to hear about your family.” I got a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes, and I barely managed to croak out a “Thanks.” Although I don’t cry easily, that night I went home and cried the most that I had ever cried. When I realized it, not only was I finally grieving the major loss of my family, but I was also grieving the fact that I would never be able to get to know Chad better.
Over the next six months, I coasted through the lawsuits and work and my life in general. The bright, long days of summer kept me from becoming too depressed, but by the time October rolled around, those days were getting shorter and a full-fledged depression began to set in. Also, the change off Daylight Saving Time was about to happen, and I knew that less sunlight would probably send me over the edge. So I made major changes to my life. I sold the house because it had way too many memories and bought a large, top floor, three bedroom, two bath condo overlooking the upper end of the Chesapeake Bay. I also visited my family doctor and asked about anti-depressants. He said that he would prescribe some, but on one condition: I had to start a daily regimen of exercise and join a health club. Since I had always thought of health clubs, specifically the showers in health clubs, as “too public,” I purchased a treadmill and a weight machine and began to exercise at home. I still joined a health club that had a number of racquetball courts and began to relearn racquetball, but I only played there–I always took the showers at home. The health club is where I met Robert, an incredibly good-looking stud that was also a manager. Robert became a “close friend” and I enjoyed his company from time to time, but that’s a different story.
On the exercise program, I began to loose inches around my middle and began to add some muscles in my chest and back, an area that I had not been proud of for most of my life. I also began to get better definition in my leg and arm muscles. I say “began” because at my age it took a lot longer and a lot more effort to get everything looking like I wanted it to look. With the exercise and the anti-depressants, I got through the fall and winter months, especially those times around the holidays when you’re with extended family who all too often liked to remember what life was like before “the accident.” I didn’t make it through with flying colors, but I did make it through. I also got some unexpected help from Robert in that cold, snowy February around the time that would have been my wife’s birthday. Now I only had to get through the first anniversary of the accident.
I was muddling through April when I overhead someone in the next cube say that Chad was having problems in his marriage. Although I didn’t hear the whole story, apparently his wife wanted to move away to California and he wanted to stay. About two weeks later, I heard through the grapevine that she had filed for divorce and moved to California without him. I felt really sorry for Chad and wondered why anyone would treat him so stupidly. A couple of weeks later, when I finally saw him in his cube again, I stopped by, leaned in and said, “Sorry to hear about your marriage. If you ever need someone to talk to, I’m available.” The first look he gave me was something I had never seen from Chad before, and when I figured it out, I realized that I had hit a really sore point and he was pretty pissed that I had mentioned it. But the look quickly softened and he said “Thanks.” Based on his tone of voice, I knew he’d never take me up on it. After that short encounter, I realized that I still hadn’t learned the lesson that sometimes it’s just better to keep your mouth shut.
After work on a Monday in early June, Chad and I happened to be walking out to the parking lot at the same time. I asked him how it was going, and he replied with the standard “Okay.” We walked a little further in silence, and as I was about to say good-bye and turn to go to my car, Chad asked me where I had been working out. He and a few other people had noticed how I had changed and he was interested in doing the same thing. He also said that he needed to find a place to relieve some of the tension and frustration he was having with the divorce proceedings. I explained that I had my own exercise equipment but that I had also joined a health club that had good equipment and a lot of racquetball courts. He was disappointed that I had my own equipment but seemed interested in the club. When I suggested that he come to the club as my guest that coming Friday, he was tentative, but still accepted.
On Friday, I was excited about meeting Chad at the health club. We had planned to meet at 9pm, I’d show him around a while, and then he’d leave and I’d play my usual single-person game of racquetball from ten to eleven. I was genuinely interested in helping this guy find a place to relax through some exercise. Chad was right on time, and we got through the club quickly. I showed him around the areas I knew (racquetball courts and weight rooms) and then pointed to the other areas that I didn’t frequent (the showers). Once we had finished, we walked up to the front desk and I introduced him to Robert. On hearing Chad’s name, Robert looked over at me, flashed a quick grin, turned back to Chad and said “Jim’s mentioned you a couple of times. Glad to finally meet you.” They shook hands, and when Chad turned to look at me, I turned a bright red. “Robert and I play racquetball against each other sometimes, and I was hoping that I could get you to play sometime as well,” I responded, hoping that this would cover what I really had said to Robert about Chad. After Chad turned away, I shot a disapproving look back at Robert. Of course he ignored the look, but at least he changed the conversation to the features, benefits, and costs of a membership. After a minute, Robert looked at me and said with a grin, “You can go now. I’ll take it from here.” Chad added, with an even bigger grin and a chuckle, “I’m a big boy, you can leave now . . . Dad.” I laughed out loud and knew that it was meant as a joke, but I was still somewhat hurt by the comment. Yes, I was a fair amount older than Chad, but I wasn’t that old. As I walked away, Robert called out “You have court 7 tonight.” Ah, yes, Court 7 and all of its memories.
Monday morning couldn’t come quickly enough. When it did, I stopped by Chad’s cube to see what had happened after I left. With a somber look on his face, Chad told me that the entry and monthly fees were too much for him right now, but he’d keep it in mind later. I was disappointed, but an idea popped into my head. I asked him to come into a nearby conference room for a minute. He was wary for a moment, but hopefully I overcame his hesitance when I offered to pay for his first year on the condition that he play a racquetball game against me each week. He said he’d think about it, and that’s all I could ask for.
The next day Chad was in his cube and I didn’t bother him. I did happen to see him a couple of times in a nearby conference room having private phone conversations. Toward the end of the day, he came to my cube, plopped down in a chair, and quietly accepted my offer for a membership at the health club. He also muttered something about needing to draw a face on a racquetball and hit it really hard many, many times. I grinned and when he saw me, he blushed and said that he really didn’t mean it. I quietly and jokingly said, “Like hell you did.” He grinned back at me and laughed, and the sparkle in his eye acknowledged that I got what he meant. We discussed meeting times and found out that Friday evenings were convenient for both of us, especially since neither of us had much else of a life at this point. So we agreed to meet at the club that coming Friday to work out all the details.
That Friday, we met, got him signed into the club, and played our first game against each other. Although Chad was younger, I was better and beat him easily. But little did I know that this wouldn’t be the case for much longer. As a younger guy, he readily adapted to what little I really knew about the game, and he taught me some new moves as well. As we went through the summer, I realized that Chad’s body was slimming down in the waist and getting better defined through the chest, arms, and upper back. Because he was wearing shorts, I noticed that his leg muscles were getting larger and better defined, especially the large muscles on the fronts and backs his thighs. His legs also looked a hairier to me than before, but they had probably always been that hairy and I was just studying them more closely now. As I found out later, he had been to the club almost five nights every week since early June, and his body showed it. Now in late August, I found that I couldn’t play against him without getting some sort of “bedroom thoughts”. The perfect face finally had the perfect body to go with it. All I could think of was what a moron his ex-wife must have been.
The first Friday in early September, I noticed Chad’s game was off. Well, actually it was as if he weren’t even there. I won two games in about thirty minutes instead of the hour and a half, best 2-of-3 grudge matches that we usually played. On the way out to our cars that night, I asked if there was anything he wanted to talk about. He quietly said, “The divorce was final today.” Under the dim parking lot lights, I saw his eyes begin to glisten from the tears, and all I could say was “Sorry, bud.” He turned, put his hands on the top of his car, and leaned into them. It was then I noticed that he had begun to cry quietly. After a few seconds, I couldn’t help myself. I put a hand on his shoulder, slowly turned him around to face me, and pulled him into a hug with his arms over my shoulders and my arms around his middle. Holding him gently, I said “Let it go, bud. Let it go.” I was kind of surprised when he leaned into me and continued the quiet crying for another three or four minutes. During that time, a whole range of emotions flooded me. First there was anger that anyone would treat this great guy so shabbily. Then there was a sadness that he had to go through this. But the final emotion made me feel more guilty than I had in years. Because of the situation, I was glad that I had stood in such a way that only our upper bodies were touching. With the heat of his body against mine, the strength of the muscles in his back where I held him, and the touching that I had wanted to do for almost four years, my cock got the hardest it had been in some time. He was a good friend who really needed a shoulder to cry on, but I had violated that friendship by getting a hard-on. Geez, I felt so unworthy. Luckily for me, Chad never knew about it. Had he discovered it, he probably would have decked me right there and never spoken to me again. And at that point in my life, I needed his friendship way more than he needed mine, so I kept all those feelings to myself.
After the crying subsided, Chad slowly pushed away from me. His eyes still glistened from the tears, but he looked more relaxed than he had in a while. Maybe holding him and letting him get it out of his system was what he needed. He looked at how wet he had gotten the shoulder of my t-shirt and apologized. My response was “That’s what friends are for.” I paused for a couple of seconds, then made the wild ass comment, “Now go home, take a good shower, have a beer, jack off to some porn on the Internet, and get a good night’s sleep. You need it.” He looked surprised at my comment, but I reached over and ruffled the hair on his head and said, “Go. Get out of my sight and have some fun for a change.” He stared at me for about another five seconds as if he were going to ask a question, but then he told me “Good night”, got in his car and drove away. After I watched him turn the corner, I got into my car and pulled away. I was going to go home to do exactly what I had told him to do, but my porn tonight was going to have to be someone that looked as close to Chad as I could find.
During that early September, our friendship changed much for the better. I gave in to Chad’s requests and began working out with him at the club on weeknights. More than ever before, he started joking around, playfully punching me, and running into me in the racquetball court. Because of the change, my jack off sessions in the shower at home afterwards got more intense. Before I did anything stupid that would have damaged our friendship, my job forced me to go on travel for a couple of weeks.
On the Friday night before I left, I cornered Robert away from everyone else in the place and said “I’m going on travel for a couple of weeks. Will you keep Chad out of trouble, especially a couple of weeks from now on ‘gay Friday’?” Robert assured me he would, but he flashed that killer smile of his and I felt uneasy. “And would you please not fuck him before I get a chance?” I added.
When he saw the seriousness in my face, he got serious as well and responded, “I know what Chad means to you. I would never do anything to screw up your relationship.”
Relieved, I added, “Thanks, bud. I owe you.”
With that statement, Robert flashed his killer smile again, looked quickly down at my crotch and back up, and said “Paybacks are hell, you know.”
I felt a tingling in my crotch and ass from that quick look, and decided to leave before it became too obvious how I’d have to pay him back.
Being away was difficult, but work kept me busy through all waking hours. We were deploying a new, multi-site, multi-million dollar software system and being the technical lead meant I had to be there for everything: the predeployment user meetings, the tiresome meetings with management to endlessly discuss risk management, the actual installation followed by immediate bug fixes, and the closing “training” (aka, gripe) sessions. And this had to happened at three locations, Washington, D.C., Dallas, and Sacramento, so I built up quite a bit of airline miles during those two weeks, too. The trip had been a success, and I came home on the first Sunday in October. I was relieved that everything had gone so well, but was exhausted from the 90 to 100 hour work weeks and weekends. Because I really wanted to see Chad the next day, I went to bed early. Soon I was in one of the deepest and most relaxed sleeps that I had been in for a while.
As I got to work early that Monday, some people had heard about our success and were congratulating me and the rest of the team. The rest of the morning went by quickly with people dropping by and the inevitable e-mail cleanup chore that I was faced with. At lunch I looked around but Chad was nowhere to be found. I asked one of the people in the cube near him, and they said something about Chad taking a vacation. They weren’t really sure where or why he’d gone, because he’d left work abruptly the previous Thursday afternoon. After hearing this, I felt kind of selfish. Of all the people in the office, his face was the one I needed to see and his voice was the one I needed to hear. He wasn’t here and I felt really empty because of it. I left a couple of messages on his cell phone, but no response. It was almost as if he was avoiding me.
As the days progressed, someone told me that Chad was in the office, but I never heard him and couldn’t find him. He seemed to be working in a number of locations both in the office and outside. And then it happened: on Friday afternoon I saw Chad in the parking lot, but instead of coming to see me, he got in his car and drove away. My suspicions about him avoiding me had just been confirmed. I watched helplessly as he turned the corner and drove out of sight. I barely made it to my car before losing it. Luckily no one came out of the building during that time, so I didn’t have to explain why I was crying even though I’d had a successful past few weeks. Without Chad in the picture, not much else really mattered.
As I walked into the club later that night, Robert spotted me and saw the rotten mood written all over my face. He looked at the schedule and said, “You have Court 7 tonight with me as your racquetball partner. Chad called and said he wouldn’t be in tonight.” When he looked up again, he saw the beginning of tears in my eyes and said “Go on in, I’ll be there in a couple of minutes.” As I waited for Robert, my mind raced through thoughts about why Chad was acting the way he was. It all led back to what Robert had probably said. When Robert arrived, I asked him to tell me what he had told Chad the previous week. He had told Chad about “gay Friday”, the first odd numbered Friday of each month where management turned a blind eye to the “No Sex in This Building” rules. He told Chad that good-looking guys were hit on heavily by other guys on those nights and that he might want to stay away. Robert had also added that if Chad ever wanted to “experiment” with another guy, then Chad should let him know so that he could arrange it with someone they both knew. After Robert’s last statement, I suddenly realized that I was the only person common to both of them. Neither had traveled in the other’s social circle until they met at the club, so in one statement Robert had let Chad know that I was at least bisexual, if not gay. As I slowly began to boil from that revelation, I asked him, “When did you tell Chad this?” Robert responded, “It was during the day on . . . I believe it was Thursday afternoon of last week.”
It was at that point I lost it and did something really stupid: acting on sheer anger, my 6’1″ 205 pound, nicely-muscled older body pushed and pinned a 6’3″ 235 pound, well-tuned, very muscular, younger body up against the wall. I was beyond pissed, and starting yelling at Robert about how he had cost me a really close friendship. I yelled that Chad has been avoiding me all week and drove away when he saw me today. I yelled that I should somehow make him hurt for this, because I hurt so bad from it all. With my last statement, I saw the look on Robert’s face change from shock and sadness to anger. Within a second, I found myself being pushed around and back against the wall, all so quickly that it took my breath away. While pinning my arms to the wall, Robert moved down within about two inches of my face and hissed, “You don’t know half the pain I’ve been going through watching you two these last couple of months. You don’t see me anymore. You don’t have time to be with me anymore. I hurt but I cover it up because I know you’re probably the happiest you’ve ever been. So don’t tell me that I should be hurt because of this. I am already hurting.”
After a few seconds of trying to understand what he had said and meant, my face and eyes must have told him that I was sorry because he loosened his death grip on my arms. I quietly said, “Sorry, bud. I never knew. I thought we got together only for the sex.”
Robert let go of me, turned away, and responded quietly, “It was only the sex until I saw how happy you and Chad were all of last month. Then thinking back to July made me realize that I wanted more than just sex.”
After a few moments, I walked up behind Robert and scratched his back for a while. At this point in our relationship, I knew him well enough to know that it was one of the most calming influences on his psyche. Then I wrapped my arms around him and said, “If it doesn’t work out with Chad, I’d like to see where our relationship might go. But all the women here will really be disappointed.”
He responded quietly, “Fuck ‘em.”
I responded in a joking manner, “Hmmmm, haven’t you already done that?”
I paused waiting for the chuckles which came through about four or five seconds later. Robert then broke away from me, turned around and laughingly said, “Damn you! You always make it so difficult to stay angry.” After a longer pause, he looked straight into my eyes and continued in a calmer tone. “But I have to say one more thing, even though I don’t really want to. You have to give Chad some time and some space. He’ll come around. I know because I found out quickly that he and I are similar. We share common interests. And we’re the types that always come back to you because you’re always there. We can depend on that no matter what else happens. So no matter how hard we try, we can never seem to find a way to get over you.”
I was stunned by what I had just heard, and I’m sure my face showed it, too. When I was finally able to answer I said “I’m not sure I know what to say.”
Robert looked away and responded, “You don’t have to say anything. It’ll all work out somehow.” After another few moments, he looked at me and said, “So, are we going to play this game or what?”
After about an hour of playing a single game, we had to stop at a 28-28 tie. The ball had remained in play for 10 to 15 hits per serve, and each of us had run the other ragged. Usually Robert won, but his game seemed a little off that night. Before we left the court, I asked “Are we good?”
Robert looked at me, smiled that huge grin of his, and quietly said “Yeah, we’re good.”
I put my hand in the middle of his chest and said, “If it doesn’t work out with Chad within a couple of months, we really will have to see where our relationship goes.”
Robert looked me straight in the eyes and said “Count on it.”
Over the next couple of weeks, I kept busy and away from Chad. It pained me to do so, but he didn’t seem to want to have anything to do with me. I heard his voice in the area every now and then, but I never made any effort to go see him. Unfortunately, he never came to see me either, and this further saddened me. Luckily, I was also out on travel some of that time, so the pain was diverted to work. The customer already wanted changes to the system we had just installed and I was required to accompany those changes. The long weeks and weekends were beginning to drive me a little crazy, especially with no exercise and no other release for that matter. There never seemed to be enough time or energy for either.
Finally during the first week of November, I was able to slack off and work a normal 40 hour week. On Wednesday afternoon I got a peculiar voice mail from Robert who said he had someone he wanted me to meet. When I called him back later that night, he gave me the details. The guy was a virgin and needed someone gentle to break him in. I laughed as Robert gave the details, and then asked him why he didn’t do it. Robert said that this guy was a good friend and he’d never be able to face him again if he did. I hesitated, but Robert pushed. I hesitated again, but after a month of not hearing anything from Chad, I finally relented. I asked Robert if the guy had seen a doctor and Robert said that he was looking at an all-negative test sheet. Then I asked about the guy’s looks. Robert laughingly said “He’s good looking, but of course not as good looking as me.” Robert then quickly added, “You need to prep yourself on Friday, so leave work early. Also, take a nap. You’ll need it to keep up with this guy. I’ll make sure he knows how to get prepped as well. He’ll be there about 9pm, but if he doesn’t show by 9:30, come to the club and we’ll plan to get together as soon as I can leave.” Soon thereafter, we said goodbye to each other and hung up the phone. I was then left to wonder what I was about to get myself into.
Because of the recent double workload, I planned to take off Friday afternoon and all of Monday to “recuperate” as I told people. Little did they know what I had really planned. About 2pm that afternoon, I began to doubt the sensibility of doing what Robert had asked me to do. So I called him and told him that I was going to have to cancel and to apologize to his friend. After a few moments of silence, Robert told me that I couldn’t cancel, that everything was already in motion. After a couple more exchanges between the two of us, Robert outright said, “You’d be a fool to back out of this, and after looking back on it, you’d really hate yourself for backing out of an agreement to do this.” Robert had played my trump card: I always did what I agreed to do whether or not I really liked it. I finally relented again and Robert assured me that I would have an enjoyable weekend. As I hung up the phone, all I could think of is that I wouldn’t be able to stand this “newbie” for the night, much less the entire weekend.
With no excitement, I did the full-enema cleanout procedure. I hated the way it tasted and what it did to my bowels, but I always did the first time with a person so that there were no “intestinal surprises.” After my bowels settled down, I lay down for a nap. I glanced at the clock and it was around 4:30pm. I figured that I’d sleep for about thirty minutes, have a little food and then work until this guy came by.
I drifted off into a restful but mentally active sleep. I had several dreams about Chad, none of which helped my mental state about the situation. When I woke up, I looked at the clock and it said 7:45pm. After a moment, I mentally said to myself “Oh shit” as I realized that I had overslept and still had to take a shower and get other things ready.
At 8:30, I finally put on my jock strap, gym shorts, t-shirt, and sweat pants. I was ready for whoever this guy was, and if he didn’t show up, I was also ready to go to the club. Just as I was finished getting ready, the phone rang. I let it ring and then looked at the Caller ID. It was Chad’s cell phone number. Trying to calm my jitters, I answered and asked “Hey, what’s up?”
Chad flatly stated, “Uhhh, we need to talk. It’ll take only about five minutes. I’m in your parking lot. Can I come up?”
I responded, “I’m expecting someone at 9. Can we have this conversation another time?”
“No, it has to be now or never.”
Since he had given me an ultimatum, I finally decided it was probably better to get this over with now rather than to drag it out. After a pause, I responded quietly, “Sure. Come on up.”
I hung up the phone and walked to the front door about the time Chad topped the stairs in the condo lobby. Along with his workout bag, he was carrying a beer can which I thought was odd. But for this confrontation maybe he needed the beer as much as I did, and it made me wish I had drunk one. As always, Chad looked good in his sweats. I was always entranced by his looks, but this time that feeling was combined with another: sorrow that this would be the last time I would see him this way.
Since he wasn’t staying long, he dropped the workout bag by the front door and kept his coat on as we walked to the kitchen table. We sat down around it, him on one side and me on the end. Not too close, but not too far away either. He set his beer down in front of himself and asked if I had reading glasses. (Middle age and computer monitors are hell on the eyes.) I got up and pulled a pair off the nearby kitchen counter. Immediately after retrieving the glasses and sitting back down, Chad asked “When were you going to tell me about you and Robert?”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“I mean the sexual relationship that the two of you have,” he responded.
I had hoped that he would start with some small talk first, but with the question and tone of voice, he obviously he wanted to get this over with quickly. Unfortunately, I’ve never been able to hide from any question about sex, so my blushing face confirmed that I had such a relationship with Robert. After a few seconds I responded quietly, “Probably never. I never really expected you to find out because you’re straight. If I had told you, it would have destroyed our friendship, a friendship that I value highly. I’m sorry if this offends you, but what Robert and I do together is really a private matter. Why do you ask?”
Chad paused for a few seconds as if trying to decide something, then he pulled a folded-up piece of paper from his coat pocket. He said, “If I had known, maybe I would have done this sooner.” At the same time he spoke, he slid the paper over to me.
The moment I had dreaded had just arrived. I thought it was probably a court order that Chad was giving me to let me know I should stay away from him permanently. I put on my reading glasses and unfolded the paper. As I looked at it, though, I had to reorient my thoughts. This looked like some sort of a list . . . a list of tests for different types of . . . venereal diseases and AIDS. I was shocked by what I was looking at, and it must have shown because Chad reached over and pushed my jaw up to close my mouth. I felt myself blush again, then the blood drained out of my face, and I began to shake. He must have seen the effect that this was having on me because he chuckled, pushed his beer over to me and said, “Looks like you need this more than I do.”
The swig of beer helped shock me back to reality, whatever that may have been at that moment. I finally regained my composure and began to think through all that I had just seen and heard. Still not quite grasping the situation, I looked over at Chad, who had an incredibly wicked grin on his face. After a few moments, he added, “And Robert sends his regards.”
Finally realizing that I had been set up, Chad and I had a good laugh. I asked, “So, how long have you and Robert been planning this?”
“I went to him a little over two weeks ago to find out what I needed to do. We planned this down to me asking for you to get reading glasses.” He paused and then added, “He also told me some things about your relationship.”
I blushed and looked away from Chad’s eyes. “How much?” I asked.
“Not too much.” After a short pause, Chad added, “But he says that he loves you.”
“It was just sex for him until he saw you and me together in September,” I responded. I looked up to catch Chad’s eyes, just about the time he lowered his. He then looked back up to meet my eyes. After a few moments of looking at each other, we both looked away. We both had just realized that the joke was over and the reality of what we were about to do was here. I shifted uneasily in my chair. “Are you sure want to go through with this?” I asked.
After what seemed like an eternity, Chad responded quietly, “Yes and no. Yes, because I’m curious and Robert has told me how good it can feel, and no, because of how painful it might be.”
I waited and then responded. “Well, it will be painful at first, but as we get used to each other, I think you will find it . . . enjoyable, uh, really enjoyable. Fucking a good looking guy, like you, and getting fucked by that same guy always turns me on, but unfortunately most guys don’t seem to believe that until they’ve felt it personally. So no matter what I say, it won’t make much difference until you’ve actually experienced it for yourself.”
“Robert told me you made a policy of being on the giving end instead of the receiving end of the first fuck.” After a few seconds, Chad added, “Why is that?”
I took a deep breath, sighed, and explained what had happened. “One of my college roommates and I experimented some. We agreed that whatever one did, the other would get to do, too. So I let him do me first. After that painful first time, it was time for me to do him. He begged off saying that I was too big for him, and it would be too painful for him since he was so tight. I was still naive and trusting at 19, and a couple of weeks later, I let this happen a second time. When he asked a third time, I kneed him in the groin and told him ‘No’ until he let me do him. He never raised the possibility again. Luckily the semester ended a couple of weeks later, and I never had to have him as a roommate again. After that experience, I vowed that I’d never again get fucked first.”
After hearing that, Chad simply said “Ouch.” After a short time, he said, “I have a second question.”
“Shoot,” I said.
“Why did I have to drink all that stuff that made me shit everything out? That was probably one of the most painful, and messy, experiences of my life,” Chad said.
I paused and then explained, “It cleans you out so there are no ‘intestinal surprises,’ as I call them, to ruin the situation. I know it tastes bad and it’s painful, but for our first time together it’s better that you’re all cleaned out. As time goes on, condoms are what we’ll use, but for a first time, this is better. Just to let you know, I’ve done the cleanout as well so there’s nothing in me either. I know it’s rough, but I think you see why as we go through the weekend.”
After finishing the explanation, we sat silently for what seemed like another eternity. I was halfway expecting another question from Chad, but when there was none I asked, “Are you nervous?”
Chad quietly answered, “Yes.”
I quietly replied, “I am too.” I looked up to meet his eyes. A small grin came across his face, and I know that I grinned as well. Soon we were both laughing. For me it was a release of some of the tension of the moment. Hopefully it was for him as well.
I upped the pace. “Let me get this started. We’re going to go back to the bedroom. You’re going to strip down to your birthday suit, lay face down on the bed, and I’m going to give you a back rub. After that, I’ll rub your legs and feet, and then I’ll slowly introduce you to what I hope will be the pleasurable sensation of getting fucked by a guy. It will be painful the first time, but I really think you’ll find it enjoyable shortly after that. Along the way, if you can remember what I do to you, then after I’m done, you can do the same thing to me. Does this sound okay to you?”
After a few moments, Chad nervously said “Yeah” while looking down at the table. Seeing his nervousness, I made a loose fist, and slid it across the table until it touched his arm. A few seconds later, he looked up at me and said “Yeah” again, but this time he was less nervous.
We both got up from the table and slowly made our way back to the bedroom. Being November, as we passed the thermostat, I stopped, upped the temperature to 76, and put it on hold so that the temperature would stay the same all night long. As I made the change, I said “Nervous and cold are not good things.” That got another chuckle out of Chad. But it seems that I needed the temperature change more than Chad because my hands were getting cold from the nervousness, and that certainly wouldn’t be a good thing when giving someone a back rub or anything else.
In the bedroom, I pointed to the bathroom and said, “Go in there, strip down and put your clothes on the counter. When you’re ready, let me know, and I’ll have you come back out here. Oh, and take a leak to empty your bladder.” With that, Chad went into the bathroom. It hit me as he entered: the next time I would see him, he would be completely naked.
During that time, I slipped out of my sweat pants, leaving on socks, shorts and a t-shirt. I pulled back the covers on the bed, put out a pillow where Chad’s head would go, and put out a couple of towels on that part of the bed where he might accidentally piss on as he got fucked. I also heard him taking a leak in the toilet, so I know that these wouldn’t get used much. Finally, I got out two small tubes of lube and put one on each of the nightstands on either side of the bed. A short time later, I heard Chad’s voice from the bathroom saying, “I’m ready.”
“Come on out,” I replied.
I wasn’t quite prepared for what I saw as Chad came out of the bathroom, and I lost my breath at the sight. The perfect face did have the perfect body. I had never seen Chad with his shirt off, and the situation left me speechless. The workouts had increased his pectoral size and he had added muscles in his upper back that you could see from his front. Although he had always looked broad to me, the muscles on his shoulders made him look even broader than I expected. He had lost any fat he might have had around waist and he was working on an 8-pack abs. The result was a nicely-formed V-shaped body. And that V-shape was covered with a light coating of dark brown hair, mostly on his pecs, but also included a wide trail from his chest over his abs and down to his crotch. And when I looked at this crotch, I noticed that he had also a very nice package: a large hard-on was sticking up at a 45 degree angle with a large patch of hair at the base. A pair of large balls hung below his cock and the hair flowed from his crotch down onto his legs. Thank goodness I had adjusted myself while he was in the bathroom because I was instantly and incredibly hard just looking at this really nice-looking body.
I must have taken longer than I should have looking at his body because Chad interrupted the look by clearing his throat and giving me a sly grin. He must have figured out that I really enjoyed the view. When I realized this, I blushed, but I tried to recover by saying this: “Slight change of plan. I want to make sure that you’re fully relaxed so I’m going to massage your front before I massage your back. So, I need you to lay down on your back with your head on the pillow and your hands behind your head.” The I-know-bullshit-when-I-hear-it look I got from Chad indicated that I had failed to recover. So I looked down at the floor in front of me and said “Okay, I’ve never seen you without a shirt, much less fully naked. I want to play with you a while.” The comment made Chad laugh out loud and made me feel much less nervous. He then jumped on the bed, rolled over on his back and adjusted the pillows and towels around him. I got on the bed next to his side and sat facing his body with my legs crossed.
As I started to stroke his chest with my one hand, Chad reached down, grabbed my other arm, and asked “When do you get naked?”
“When you turn over. No need to divert attention from the plan,” at which point I reached down and lightly brushed my hand over his hard cock.
Although he didn’t let go of my arm, he did close his eyes and moan. After a couple of seconds, he reopened his eyes and said, “It would be nice to have you naked while I’m naked so I don’t feel so self-conscious.” A few seconds later, he added, “By the way, I find you good looking, too.”
The comment took me by surprise. I had always thought of myself as okay looking, but never in the same class as Chad and Robert, who I thought were in that special class of “Too Good Looking” or TGL. Deep inside I wanted to make Chad feel more comfortable, but I was also afraid of doing anything that might make Chad change his mind. After a long pause, I recovered by saying, “The place hasn’t warmed up yet, and as nervous as I am, I need to keep the clothes on to stay warm. You really don’t want me to get cold hands.”
Chad almost immediately dead-panned, “Yeah right. I’m the one laying here with nothing on, giving a guy access to my family jewels and its attachment, and you’re the one that’s nervous?”
The laughter overtook both of us. It was what we needed to relax some more. After a few moments I added, “Laughter is always good in the bedroom as long as you don’t point.” We laughed a few more moments, and then I said, “All in good time, my friend.”
As I got up on my knees to start massaging his chest, Chad let go of my arm. He could see the bulge in my shorts and he stared at it while I massaged his chest. A few moments later though, he closed his eyes and began moaning as I massaged him. I worked his pecs, and slid down to his stomach to massage the upper part of his abs. I skipped over his crotch and massaged the muscles on the tops of his upper and lower legs, all from the same location on the bed. Then I sat back down with his crotch in front of me. I rubbed up the inside of his closer leg until my hands brushed his balls. Although not as well, I then massaged the inside of his other leg. Finally, I lightly massaged his balls, separating them and squeezing them lightly. Then I massaged his lower abdomen underneath his cock, my fingers running through the hair. I was so glad that he had lots of hair. Although I enjoyed the silky smoothness of women, hair was something that I really enjoyed about guys.
After a short time, I wrapped my right hand around his cock and gave it a few short strokes. His eyes opened briefly and moaned, “It’s about time.” As I stroked his cock lightly, I checked it out more closely. He was cut, with a purple head larger than his shaft. His shaft was just under six inches around and just under seven inches long. I figured this out using my fingers as temporary measuring tapes. I must have taken longer than I had thought, because Chad cleared his throat and said, “So how big am I and how do I . . . compare to you?”
“You’re not huge, but you’re big. You aren’t too big around that you’ll injure a guy when you fuck him, but you’re still big enough to make him moan and groan a lot. And you’re long enough that stand-up sex won’t be a problem, but not so long that you’ll hurt a guy in the missionary position.” I paused and then said, “And we’re about the same size.”
After a few seconds, he responded, “Then getting fucked by you is going to be some experience.” Hearing that and feeling his hard cock in my hand, all I could think of was how good it would be to get fucked by him too. It nearly caused me to shoot, but I needed to save it for later.
I wrapped my right hand around his cock again and began to stroke more earnestly, all the way up and down the full length of his cock. Chad began to moan and groan more and, after another minute or two, he began to lift his hips slightly. It didn’t take much longer, and I knew he was ready to shoot when he grabbed my arm again and held it tightly. I stroked him faster, and I could see the muscles tightening all through his stomach, legs, and chest. His head tilted back and his hips came up a few inches. He opened his mouth and began to say “Ah Ah Ah Ahhhhh”. On the “Ahhhhh”, I felt the pulsing begin in his cock, and his body trembled as each load came rocketing out. The first shot was a giant quarter-sized glob that landed in the middle of his chest, the second was thick and ropey across his upper abs, and the remaining five shots pooled on his lower abs where they mixed in with the hair. I kept stroking him as he kept pulsing, and the pulsing eventually got less and less until it stopped completely. Eventually he began to soften so I used my whole hand on top of his cock and balls to massage the entire area lightly while he recovered.
I reached over to get a towel to clean him off. Since he still had a hold of my arm, he felt me move and I heard, “Not yet. Gimme a little more time.”
I chuckled and said, “That good, huh?”
With his eyes still closed, he gave me one of his mega-watt grins. He added later, “I think that’s the strongest I’ve ever cum.” After waiting a while, he opened his eyes, did a partial sit-up with both elbows under him, and took a look at the results. He reached down and touched the cum on his chest and crotch, and then said, “Yeah, that’s the strongest I’ve ever cum.” He then lay down and looked over at me with those piercing blue eyes of his.
“Hand jobs tend to bring more out in a guy,” I said.
After a long pause, Chad replied, “It also helps to have someone you like do it for you.”
I looked at him and he returned the look. He hadn’t said “love” yet, but he had made a first step. Looking him in the eyes, I added quietly, “The feeling is mutual.”
I used the towel to clean him off, making sure that none of that gorgeous hair was left matted. Soon Chad changed the subject. “So what do you have in those shorts?”
He laughed at the statement. Obviously I had evaded the real question successfully this time. “Okay, smart ass, let me be more direct. Take off all your clothes. It’s my turn to get a look at your goods.”
The moment of truth had finally arrived. I started to ask “Are you sure you want me to take. . . .” only to be immediately interrupted by Chad saying, “Yes,” and tugging at my shorts.
I knew I had to do this, but I was unsure. I was older than he was, the hair was sprinkled with gray, and older bodies just don’t look like younger bodies. But I did it anyway. He looked on as I slowly took off my t-shirt, socks and gym shorts, leaving on only the jockstrap. As Chad looked me over, he got this sly grin on his face. “So you’ve been hiding a well-muscled and nicely hairy body from me, too.” And I noticed that his cock had begun to lengthen again. He sat up and ran his fingers through my chest hair and stomach hair. I pushed him back down to the bed and said, “Not right now. I need you to turn over. You might want to lay on that pillow to be more comfortable.”
With a big grin on his face, he said, “So, this is the part where I get fucked, right?”
I laughed and said, “Yes, and lay down before I have to tie you down,” which got a chuckle from him.
After he got situated and comfortable, I began the massage. With one hand on top of the other and the fingers intertwined, I used the heel of my doubled hands to massage around and down one side of his spine to his butt and then back up the other side. All the time, Chad moaned lightly. I did this a couple of times along the spine and a few inches to either side. Then I massaged his upper arms, shoulders and neck with a kneading massage. He moaned louder on this part so I kept it up for a longer time. I worked my way down each arm, massaging each part including his hands, followed by a massage back up the arm. Then I worked down his back again. As I got a little too close to a side, Chad moved abruptly and said, “Don’t massage my sides.”
I asked, “Why?”
He replied, “Because we aren’t that close.”
I laughed. I’m thinking here is a guy, on his stomach, completely naked and about to let me fuck him, and he says “We aren’t that close?” But when the object of your affection is naked next to you, your mind gets fuzzy at least some. Finally, I got what he was saying. “Oh . . . OOOOHHH . . . okaaaaay . . . so what you’re really saying is that you’re a little ticklish?” I asked with a slight grin on my face.
“Just a little”, he said. At which point I put one hand on each side and began to tickle him. He began to thrash around like a wild bucking horse, and before I realized it, he had turned around, sitting with his face about a six inches from mine, and was holding my balls tightly in one of his hands. He looked me straight in the eyes and said, “Do that again, and I’ll have to hurt you.” And then he squeezed.
As I felt the pain from my balls being squeezed, I said, “Okay, okay, message received loud and clear.” He held on to make sure, gave a extra hard, quick squeeze, and then let go. Although I was still in pain, I did notice one thing: his actions had certainly taken any immediacy out of my situation. He lay back down on his stomach and got comfortable again.
While trying to recover, I continued the massage, skipping over his butt and moving down his legs. I massaged the well-defined thigh muscles and then continued down to his calves. Remembering what he had just done when tickling his sides, I made sure that I didn’t tickle the bottoms of his feet as I massaged them. I had taken several minutes on this set of massages to make sure that I could recover from the little stupidity of earlier, and now I was almost back to normal.
At this point I had Chad spread his legs. I sat down in between them and took a look. There was a light coating of hair on his butt cheeks that got much thicker in the crack and ran from the top of his crack all the way down to his balls. Geez, I thought, this guy is hairy in all the right places and I love it. That’s when I began to massage around his butt. I massaged the thighs up to and onto his butt, and I reached down and massaged his balls which were laying there. I ran my hand lightly over all of his butt, balls, and upper legs. Then I lightly ran my middle finger from the lower part of his spine, down between the cheeks, and down to his balls. That got a loud groan and a shiver out of him. As I continued to massage his cheeks and begin to work into crack, I noticed that he was moaning more and more. With my middle finger, I massaged more and more around his hole and then massaged the hole directly.
After working around his hole for a while, I reached over to the nightstand and got some lube for my middle finger. Using that lubed finger, I massaged around and into his hole. As I pushed in, Chad’s moans turned into quick breaths and I noticed he was tensing up. When he didn’t loosen up soon, I had to say something. “Okay, bud, here’s what you need to do. Take a deep breath, hold to the count of 5 and let it out slowly. Repeat a couple of more times and try to relax your ass muscle a little more each time. Pushing out like you’re trying to take a dump will help sometimes. It’ll take some time for the pain to go away, but it will go away.” I pulled my finger out and slowly continued to massage his hole from the outside. He took the deep breaths and shortly after that, I was able to push my finger back into him easily. He was beginning to loosen, so I did what I really enjoyed doing to myself: I moved my finger around in a circle, alternating directions and rubbing along the muscle itself rather than across it which is what an in-out motion would have been. As I went faster and faster, I noticed his hole getting looser and looser. He was also beginning to moan more and louder. Soon I stopped. Chad sighed and spent some time catching his breath. I noticed that he relaxed even more, not just in his ass muscle but all over.
I pulled my middle finger out and then inserted both the middle and ring fingers. With my fingers side-by-side to stretch him some, I moved my fingers up and down the muscle instead of in a circle. Chad began to moan and groan and I could tell he was enjoying it. After a short time, I stopped and pushed in and down in search of his prostate. Being a young guy, his prostate wasn’t too big, but it was big enough to find easily. I pushed down on it with both fingers and began to massage it, then I moved my fingers around to massage the sides and top and bottom for a short while. Finally, I put one finger on top of the other and massaged the center of it hard and fast. All of the sudden, Chad yelped. I stopped rubbing and asked if he was okay. With a pant in his voice he said, “Don’t stop, keep going.” As I started massaging his prostate again, he tried to push my fingers out as if he were taking a dump, but I wouldn’t let him. I continued to rub his prostate and massage his ass muscle more and even faster. Soon, with his voice sounding like what you’d sound like if you tried to talk while trying to push out a really big turd out that won’t come out, Chad said, “Damn, now I know why some guys like to get fucked.”
After about another ten to fifteen seconds of prostate massage, I noticed that Chad wasn’t breathing. He hadn’t passed out on me because he was groaning heavily, but he wasn’t breathing either. So I stopped, and he started panting heavily. He had really gotten into this and in such a short time. I wanted to massage him more, but I didn’t want him to pass out either. I told him, “You need to learn how to breath, big guy. Try to alternate pushing with breathing so that you can keep going without passing out.”
After a few seconds, he replied between pants, “I’ll try, but the feelings are really intense.”
“You’re doing well otherwise, but now I need to stretch your hole some more. If it begins to hurt, let me know.” With that I pushed the two fingers up against the top of his ass muscle with a little force and then pulled them down to the bottom with a little force. No response from Chad. Then the same thing a second time with more force. Still no response. On the third time I pushed up and down pretty hard. When I pushed down, Chad whimpered, so I stopped for a little while because I knew that I was hurting him. I rubbed his back with my free hand while continuing to massage his ass muscle like I had earlier. I asked, “Why didn’t you tell me sooner that I was hurting you?”
A few seconds later and sounding as if he were in pain, he responded, “I didn’t want to be a wimp.”
With those words, I wanted him more than ever, not for the physical pleasure, but as a soul mate who would do whatever it took, even bearing with personal pain, to bring pleasure to others. I probably would have stopped there, but my hardon was about to burst and my lust for his ass had begun to take over what I did.
I pulled my fingers back, put a third with the group, and pushed the group back into him slowly. At the same time, I rotated my hand back and forth so that all three fingers would massage his ass muscle as they entered his body. Soon Chad was squirming and panting and groaning with pleasure again. I got up on my knees and removed my jockstrap with my spare hand, leaving my cock and balls to finally hang free. My cock stood up at a 45 degree angle. I was probably the hardest I had ever been in a long time.
I told Chad, “Get up on your hands and knees and spread your legs some.” As he did what I asked, I continued to twist my fingers in his ass. Shortly after he got into position, I pulled my fingers from his ass, spread the lube and wetness on my rock hard cock, aimed it for his ass, and moved until the head was against his hole. “Now push back on me slowly,” I said, and he began to push back against my cock. He initially resisted, but let his ass muscle relax some more.
When my cockhead popped past the ass muscle into him, he cried out, “Damn, you’re big.” Although I could tell he was in pain, he continued to push back onto me until most of my cock was deep inside him.
At this point, the pleasure and lust were so great that I didn’t really care whether Chad was in pain anymore. After waiting a few more seconds for the insides of his ass to adjust around me, I grabbed his hips and slowly began to piston in and out of him. I watched as my cock disappeared slowly inside him and reappeared as I pulled back, repeating the trip time and time again. A sense of urgency built in me as I felt the heat of his ass wrapped tightly around my cock. Faster and faster I went, now totally lost in the sensation. I don’t know how much longer I took, but it couldn’t have been too long. I felt a boiling begin deep inside me and I tried to hold back for as long as I could. Soon, all of my muscles began their pulsing contractions. Loads of cum shot out of me and deep into him, again and again and again, so many times that I lost count. The pleasure was so intense that it took my breath away. Everything from my head to my toes concentrated on the tightness around my cock and the feeling of cum rushing through it. All of this continued for what seemed like an eternity, and I vaguely remember wishing that it could have been.
After a few more moments, I came back to reality. My cock had started to go soft and I slowly pulled it out of Chad’s ass. Chad collapsed face forward onto the bed and I collapsed on my back next to him. Both of us were panting heavily, me from plowing his ass and him from trying to push my cock out of his ass. After we had regained our breath, I turned on my side and rubbed my hand lightly all over his back. “So, are you going to be okay?” I asked.
“I hurt,” was all he said, his face still buried in the bed.
Immediately I said, “Sorry that I got a little carried away there.”
After a pause, he turned slightly and replied, “Actually I don’t hurt too much, but I have a really good idea about how it might feel to get raped.”
“Sorry, bud. Do I need to take you to a hospital?” I asked.
He propped himself up on his elbows and, looking down at the bed, said, “The pain isn’t that bad, just my ass muscle is taking some time getting used to being stretched.” Then he turned to me, looked me straight in the eye, and added with a grin, “But I don’t hurt enough to stop me from fucking the hell out of your ass.”
I grinned back and said, “And that I’m sure you’ll do.” After a pause, I added, “But before we go on, I think you may want to go sit on the toilet. I, uh, dumped a pretty big load inside you and it’ll probably want to come out. So you may want to go do that sooner rather than later.”
Not really believing me, Chad said, “Okay,” and he got up and started toward the bathroom. Then he ran into the bathroom. I heard him mutter something like “just made it” as he sat down on the toilet. Seems that I had also pushed a lot of air into him because he had a lot of gas, too. I began to snicker, passing gas always seems to do that to me, and I heard him do the same. While waiting for Chad to return, I adjusted the pillows and towels to lay face down on the bed and expose my whole backside to him.
Chad flushed the toilet but the noise of the refilling toilet covered him coming out of the bathroom. Next thing I know, he was next to me. He leaned over my body and began to massage my upper back. His technique was good and he massaged the most tense muscles around my neck and shoulders. This made me moan and groan. Next, he worked down my back. I noticed that my left arm was between his legs, and my left hand could have easily reached his balls. I should have grabbed them just to surprise him, but I didn’t.
He continued the massage down my back and then lightly over my butt cheeks. After that he massaged my upper thighs, making sure his fingers grazed my balls every now and then. He worked his way down my legs, to my feet, and then back up to my butt. He said, “Spread your legs so I can massage your butt better.” As I spread my legs, I felt him crawl into the space they left behind. Obviously we both knew what was coming next.
For what seemed like ages, he ran his hand lightly over all of my ass, between my legs, and the exposed portions of my balls. He was feeling the hair all over my ass, legs, and balls, and it was driving me wild. I moaned and said “Geez, that feels good.” He then lightly moved one of his fingers up and down my ass crack, finally stopping to massage around my hole. I glanced backwards and said huskily, “You’ll need to massage my ass muscle so I can handle you, but you won’t need to do too much.” I also got a glance at his cock. It was hard again, sticking straight out of his body. Not the 45 degree upward angle of earlier, but hard enough that he was going to ride me really well.
He lubed his finger and began to probe and massage my ass muscle. He moved his finger around in a circle which caused me to moan and groan fairly loudly, and my ass responded by opening up quickly. He added a second finger and began to probe for my prostate. He found it quickly and massaged in a circle causing me to moan, groan, and try to push him out. Then he added a third finger and stretched me open some more. Then I heard him say, “Get up on your hands and knees.”
I got up on my hands and knees and I felt the bed move as he got positioned behind me. After a moment, I felt the heat and pressure of his cockhead on my hole. He slowly pushed against my hole and, after a short time, his cockhead popped into my ass. It was painful at first because I hadn’t been fucked in a while and I said, “Stop there for a moment while I adjust.” The pain slowly subsided and I finally said to Chad, “Okay, now push in.” He continued pushing slowly into my ass until he was all the way in. Then he began to pull out. With that I began to moan again, and he picked up speed. With his shaft rubbing my ass muscle and his cockhead rubbing against my prostate, it wasn’t long before I moaned and said, “Fuck me, Chad, fuck me.”
He picked up his speed to medium. The thrusting began to drive me wild and I involuntarily started to try to push him out of my ass. “Keep pushing into me,” I said with a groan. “Don’t let me push you out.” He continued at this pace for what seemed like an eternity. I began to pant as I alternated between breathing and trying to push him out. That seemed to trigger something in him, because he shifted his thrusting into high gear. I was panting when I said, “Fuck me, fuck me, FUCK MEEEEEEEEE.” Soon I heard Chad with a muffled voice say “I’m gonna cum.” I squeezed around him tightly, and that caused him to say “AaaaAAAAHHHHHHH” and I began to feel the pulsing in his cock and the heat of his cum as it shot into me again and again and again. No longer able to squeeze him, I groaned loudly and went back to alternating between breathing and trying to push him out. His fucking was driving me absolutely nuts.
After a short time, Chad stopped the pistoning and slowly pulled out. When he let go, I fell forward onto the bed, and he fell on his side next to me. He continued to pant as he recovered from the workout. I lay there with my arms under my head and my head turned to get a look at him. He looked relaxed with his eyes closed. The perfect face had finally gotten a piece of ass, literally.
After a short time he opened his eyes. Realizing that I was looking at him, he asked “And how long have you been looking at me?”
“Since we both fell down here on the bed.”
“I wish you’d let me know. I don’t want to look goofy in front of you,” he said.
“You didn’t. You looked very relaxed,” I responded.
After a few more moments, he said, “Thank you. My wife would have never let me do what I just did to you. Anal sex was taboo to her.”
That comment caused a flood of emotions that I quickly repressed, but not without starting some tears. I kind of croaked out, “And thank you to you, too. My wife never let me do what I did to you earlier.”
Realizing what he’d just said, he comforted me by putting his hand on my back and lightly rubbing it around. I also noticed that his eyes were a little wetter, too.
After a few moments, I rolled over on my side facing him, cleared my throat and said, “With all this physical activity, we need to take a shower and get cleaned up.”
Chad grinned at me and chuckled a bit at the comment.
“What?” I asked.
“Robert said that you like to take lots of showers. He said that it seems you two have had more sex in the shower than anywhere else here.”
“Damn him. He spoils all the fun. And what else did he tell you?”
“Not too much. He did mention something about in front on the TV and on the deck, but I didn’t quite catch all of it,” Chad responded. “It’s good that he told me about the shower, though. At least I know what’s coming next.” I noticed that there was a twinkle in his eye as he made this last comment.
“So do you think you’re up to it?” I asked.
Chad responded, “Well after what I just did to you, let’s just say my ass doesn’t hurt anymore.”
I grinned and sat up. Then I realized that he had dumped a big load up my ass. “Ooops, gotta go sit.” I jumped up and ran into the bathroom just in time to sit on the toilet. Meanwhile, I heard Chad chuckle and get off the bed.
As he walked into the bathroom, I couldn’t help but stare at him. Even soft his cock was long, long enough to hang way below his ball sack which was hanging pretty low at this point. And the hair on his chest and stomach made me get hard again. At that point I hoped that we’d be able to find some way to become lovers, because he was everything I ever wanted in a partner. Unfortunately that made me wonder even more if I would be good enough for him.
Chad broke my trance by opening the shower door, going in, and commenting, “Now this is a shower. It’s bigger than any shower I’ve ever seen.” By then I had joined him there. He continued, “So did this condo come with this shower?”
“No, it’s custom installed. Normally a double-wide, extra long tub goes here, but I wanted a large shower with two shower heads and a seat. So I got it as a special option. Also, the towels hang right outside on the outside of the glass so that I never have to reach too far for a towel. One’s always available.”
“This is really nice, but why the handicap bars?”
I blushed some and then said, “You’ll find out soon enough,” which got a puzzled look from Chad.
Chad turned the middle of the three sets of knobs in the shower. Cold water came out one nozzle straight onto his stomach. He yelped and jumped back, and I couldn’t help but laugh. I adjusted a different set of knobs and the water started coming out of the shower head. It quickly turned to warm as the hot water got to the shower from the water heater. He added, “Geez, it takes a Ph.D. to operate.” I laughed and pushed him into the water. He rinsed off all over and then stood under the spray for a short time. “Next,” he said, and stepped out of the water waiting for me to rinse.
“You need to get soaped up first,” I said, getting the soap, rubbing it on his chest, and gently pushing him back into the water so that it cascaded down his back. I could tell that he liked the idea because his cock began to stir, not much, but enough for me to tell. I continued up and over his shoulders, getting his neck well. “Hold your arms out,” which he did. I soaped up his left arm, his armpit and lightly down the side, making sure I didn’t tickle him. He flinched as I did his side indicating that he was really ticklish. Then I did his right arm and side, lightly touching his side again. He flinched again. “You’re really ticklish, aren’t you?” I asked.
“Almost too ticklish. Tickling is painful sometimes. That’s why I reacted the way I did a while ago. Sorry.”
“No problem. I didn’t know,” I said.
“Funny thing, that has only been since I started going to the club in June.”
“You’ve lost some fat in your side and gained muscle. Same thing seems to have happened to me, too,” I added.
“Oh, really?” Chad said with a twinkle in his eyes.
I looked at him directly in the eyes and said, “Don’t get any ideas. I can hurt you, too,” as I reached down and grabbed his balls and held them carefully but tightly in my hand.
“I get the picture,” he said chuckling.
After a short pause, I let go and said, “There’s some shampoo on the wall. Get some and wash your hair while I wash your legs.”
He reached over, got the shampoo, and started to wash his hair. I squatted down in front of him and washed his stomach, lower abs, cock, balls, and all over his legs. I had him lift his feet one at a time to wash them completely. During all this washing, I noticed that his cock liked the attention, and it was standing straight out.
As I stood up, I reached out, stroked his cock, and said with a grin on my face, “He seems to like the attention.”
“Yeah.” Then he got serious. “But too much more and he’ll be shooting again,” he said, as he pushed my hand away.
Then I responded, “We’ll get back to him later. But first I have to wash your face. Close your eyes. When I’m done, I’ll guide you into the water so you can rinse. And then I need to wash your back.”
Washing his face was really just an excuse for me to take a longer look at it. He closed his eyes and I soaped up my hands. Slowly I washed his forehead, moving down to his nose, the area below his nose where a mustache would have been if he had one, down around his chin and the front of his neck. Finally I put a hand on each side of his face and began to wash his cheeks and the upper sides of his face, the soap mingling with the shampoo. I lingered doing this because I was now holding this perfect face between my hands and I wanted to look at it longer. Had he not had soap all over his face, I probably would have tried to kiss him right then and there.
During that short pause, Chad did something I wasn’t expecting. With his eyes closed, he reached out, put a hand on each of my hips, and pulled me closer to him. Within a few seconds, my cock was rock hard and it began to rub against his. It was difficult for me to continue, but I finished by washing his ears and guiding him into the water as I had said I would do. He had to let go to turn into the water to wash his face, but with his hands now free, he quickly rinsed the soap and shampoo from his head. He began to turn back around, but I stopped him. “I still need to wash your back,” I said.
I washed his shoulders again and down his back. I squatted behind him and gave his ass cheeks a good soaping, but didn’t soap his ass crack. As I viewed his ass, my cock seemed to get even harder. Lust had begun to take over me again. I had him turn and wash off his back. Then I said, “Bend over and put your hands on the seat.” He looked at me for a second or two, took a deep breath, said “Please be gentle”, and moved into position. I turned the water off and squatted behind him again.
I did the same kind of finger massaging that I had done to him earlier. First one finger, moving around in circles to massage his ass muscle, followed by two fingers pushing in and down to massage his prostate, and finally three fingers to stretch the ass muscle. As I did all this, he moaned and groaned, sometimes loudly. Thankfully, his muscle stretched easier and more this time, and he didn’t say anything about pain. Also, there was plenty of lube and cum leftover from earlier so I wouldn’t need any more lube this time.
Soon I stood up, wiped some of the lube from my hand onto my cock, and guided it to his ass. I pushed slowly but steadily into him. As my cockhead popped into his ass past the muscle, he groaned loudly and tilted his head back. I stroked his back and asked, “Are you okay?” With a pant in his voice, he said, “Yes . . . Don’t pull out . . . I’m not in pain . . . Push in more . . . Damn this feels incredible.” As I slowly pushed in more and more, and felt the insides of his ass wrap itself slowly around my cock. All I could think of was, “Oh, my God. He’s got the perfect ass, too.”
I slowly pistoned in and out of his ass this time, taking a look at the incredible picture of my cock sliding in and out. I was hard but didn’t feel the need to cum as quickly as I had last time. Chad was also having a good time, and I could feel him alternating between trying to push me out and grabbing me tight with his ass muscle, a move which basically had the effect of drawing my cock deeper into him. After a while, I noticed that he was moaning and groaning loudly and not breathing much. As with the first time, I needed to make sure he didn’t pass out on me. I stopped moving my cock, but left it deep in his ass. Then I said, “Put your hands on the handicap bars and push up. I need you to stand up so I can help you with your breathing.”
He slowly put his hands up on the bars, but didn’t seem to be pushing up much. I reached up and gently pulled on a shoulder to help him up. Slowly he rose to a leaning position with his hands on the handicap bars. While he was still panting, I leaned into him, my hairy chest against his back. I wrapped my arms around him, one hand on his stomach and the other on his chest, both stroking the hair where they found it. And the whole time my cock was still in his ass.
That’s when I noticed the intense look on his face. Immediately I asked, “Are you okay?”
“Yes,” he replied.
“Do I need to pull out?” I asked.
“NO. Please no. The feeling is just so . . . intense. I’ve never felt . . . anything like it before . . . especially with a hairy body . . . against my back.”
Meanwhile, the actions of him pushing and pulling on my cock inside his ass had made me even harder, which I thought was impossible. To slow down the pace which my cock wanted to set, I tried to distract us by saying, “We need to work on your breathing. I’m going to count to five, and each time I get to five you need to change what you’re doing. Okay?”
I got no response, so I started counting slowly. “One, two, three, four, five,” and I felt him stop pushing me and begin to pant. “One, two,” and he began to push again. “You need to try to control this better. One, two, three….”
At that point, Chad surprised me by saying, “Fuck the breathing, just fuck me, and fuck me hard.”
I resumed pumping my cock in and out of him again. I hoped that he was enjoying my cock being in him, because the tightness of his ass around me was way beyond what I had ever dreamed of. We became lost in the feeling, each of us in our own sensory bliss, and this continued for what seemed like another eternity. My cock was enjoying being squeezed by a hot hole, and his ass really seemed to like having a hard cock rub its insides, especially around the prostate.
Some time later, I found myself picking up the pace. Faster and faster I went. I briefly looked down at my cock and the movement seemed like a blur to me. Soon, that all too familiar feeling began deep within the base of my cock. I could feel the cum building slowly within me, and a few moments later, I groaned loudly as my cock began to shoot another large load into Chad’s ass. As I shot, I could feel each spurt splash around inside him. In response, I could feel him tighten around me and he moaned loudly as my hot cum landed inside him. I kept up the pistoning even after I had stopped cumming because his ass felt so hot and tight around me. Unfortunately my cock had other ideas, and after a few more thrusts, I had to stop because it began to soften. After another minute or two, my cock softened completely and slid slowly out of his ass. As my cockhead slid out, Chad threw back his head and gave a final moan.
I didn’t realize it, but during this whole time, I had kept my arms around Chad and was still stroking his chest and stomach hair. I reached down to fondle his cock and found it soft because of the fucking. I fondled it more and he became fully erect quickly. He moaned and said, “Keep that up and you’re going to get raped.” So I kept stroking his cock. My ass was ready, and he certainly needed the release. I moved to his side and pushed him away from the seat. Then I moved in front of him, said “Please be gentle,” and put my hands on the seat, bending over in front of him.
The next thing I felt was one hand along my lower back and a finger from the other hand probing around my ass. As he found my hole, he easily pushed in one finger and then two fingers. He shifted around and soon I felt three fingers in my ass, along with a hand reaching under me to massage my cock and balls. That movement made me clamp down on his fingers and then involuntarily try to push his fingers out of my ass. A few seconds later, he pulled his fingers from my ass and I felt the heat of his cockhead at my hole. He pushed into me easily, and when his cockhead entered, I moaned loudly.
Soon his cock was deep within my ass and he began to piston in and out of me. He pulled me up with one hand so that I could put my hands on the handicap bars, and then he leaned against me wrapping his arms around me and fondling my cock and balls and stroking my chest as he fucked my ass. The feeling of his chest hair against my back was soon more than I could stand, so I let out a loud groan and said, “Fuck me. Fuck me, bud, fuck me.”
With that, Chad began to fuck my ass faster and faster with his rock hard cock. The pleasure from it was immense and I found that I too was having trouble breathing because of all the groaning. I clamped down around Chad’s large cock as he fucked me, but when I did, the pleasure became so intense that my ass wanted to push it out. Alternating between squeezing and pushing continued for a long time, Chad moaned and groaned his approval of what my ass was doing to him.
Soon Chad was breathing heavily, and I could feel that his cock had grown larger in my ass. As I clamped down around his cock for what would be the last time in this round, Chad yelled “Oh FUCK, here I cum” and began to shoot load after load after load of hot cum deep in my ass. I could feel his cock pulsing for a long time and the hot cum hitting my insides. After that, his cock got softer and he stopped. I didn’t want his cock to leave as it slid out of my ass, but knowing that he’d be fucking me more this weekend helped me let it go. At the same time, Chad almost collapsed against my back, so much so that I moved one arm from a handicap bar to hold one of his arms against my chest to help him keep from falling down.
After a few minutes, Chad slowly pulled up and away from me. As he pulled away, I got a sudden chill because his warm chest and stomach were no longer pressed against my back. It had gotten colder in the shower and neither of us had noticed because we were too focused on getting our rocks off. So I turned on the shower and got it warmer again. As I turned to look at Chad, I was greeted by this dazed look with a silly-ass grin. I couldn’t help but chuckle and the chuckle brought Chad back to reality.
“What?” he asked.
“Nothing. Just the look on your face, that’s all.”
“What look?” he asked.
“Well, a few seconds ago you had a really interesting look on your face.”
“Like what?” he asked.
“Like you just had the best fuck of your life. Sort like this: doctor’s visit, $75, lab tests, $225, shit-eating grin after fucking a friend without a condom, priceless. You could be the spokesman for one of those credit card commercials.”
Chad laughed out loud at my comment, but almost immediately his face turned bright red and he got this embarrassed look. To avoid my look at him, he looked down.
Seeing what I had done to him, I put a hand on the side of his face and lifted it back up so we could see eye to eye. I said to him, “There’s no need to be embarrassed. Sex can be viewed as either the most intimate expression of love that two people can share or, probably in your case, a new place to put your cock and have some fun. But either way, I don’t care how goofy you may look, all I care about is how good a time you have.”
He blushed again, but held my look. The intensity made me melt and my cock get hard at the same time. After a few moments, I pulled my hand away and happened to glance down. His cock was partially hard too. I said, “Let’s get cleaned up, and get something light to eat. I think we’ve done enough for tonight. And we don’t want to wear ourselves out before tomorrow.” With that, we both washed and rinsed under the shower, got out and dried off. When I asked about a change of clothes, Chad said that he had a couple of changes of clothes in his gym bag. Obviously Robert had prepared him well.
Standing up in the kitchen, we each had a sports drink and a cup of yogurt. Both would keep us “clean” for tomorrow’s activities, but fill us enough so we would sleep well. I was thirsty and the cold sports drink did its job at quenching that thirst. After about 10 minutes, we headed back to the bedroom to turn in for the night. As we got ready for bed, I found that he slept in the same thing I did: a pair of underwear (briefs) and a t-shirt. Most guys sleep in the nude, but he (as did I) found being completely nude to be too sticky and uncomfortable.
We crawled into bed both facing each other. I looked and him and he returned the gaze. My cock took a leap and began to get hard. I got a little nervous and asked, “Do you think you could get it up again?”
A look of surprise followed by a sly grin appeared on his face. “What did you have in mind?” he asked.
“I . . . need you to . . . fuck me again.” I said hesitatingly.
“And what about you?” he asked.
I paused and then said, “I can jack off at the same time,” hoping that he would be okay with that.
He paused a second or two, then sat up and almost ripped off his t-shirt and underwear. He already had a hard-on. I looked over at him, chuckled, and said, “Geez, I didn’t think you’d be THAT eager,” at which point he got a guilty look on his face. Then I sat up and took off my shirt and underwear, revealing my hard-on. I got a towel and adjusted it so that it would be under my butt when I laid back down. As I laid back down, I raised my legs with my knees close to my side and held them into position with my hands. As I did this, I closed my eyes and hoped that Chad wouldn’t think of me as a pussy willing to let every dick fuck it.
I felt Chad move into position next to my butt. He began to lightly touch all around my ass, running his hand lightly over the hair all over my butt and balls and around my cock. He wrapped one hand around my cock and lightly stroked it. As I opened my eyes, I noticed that he seemed spellbound by what he saw as he ran his hand all over my ass, legs and crotch. I also noticed that was lightly stroking his own cock. After another few moments, I cleared my throat and broke the spell.
He blushed and a few seconds later said, “I’ve never seen another guy’s ass this close up before.”
“Hope it meets your expectations,” I said.
After few more seconds he replied, “Oh, it does.”
He then stroked my hole and pushed a finger inside. I closed my eyes and moaned in response to the probing.
“I shouldn’t need too much preparation, so you can go ahead and stick your cock in me if you want to.” With that statement, Chad removed his finger and rubbed his cock with the lube from my ass. He then moved into position. I closed my eyes again and felt the heat from his cockhead at my hole. He eased into me, but this time he pushed all the way into me within a couple of seconds. A loud groan left my lips and I heard him ask, “Are you okay? You look like you’re in pain.”
I paused, then with a pant in my voice said, “Trust me. This isn’t pain, this is sheer ecstasy.” Then I opened my eyes to get a good look at the situation. What I saw in front of me made my cock get hard almost instantly. The eyes, the good-looking face, Chad’s hairy body between my legs, and the feeling of his cock in me had always been a fantasy, but tonight the fantasy had become a reality. I even reached out and stroked the hair on his chest just to make sure. Yep, he was real. And this vision got me even harder.
“Geez, you’re tight,” Chad said. “What’s different?”
“Since I finally got to see what it looks like with you between my legs, I’ve gotten pretty hard, and that’s making my ass contract around you more.” I stroked his chest some more, then worked my way down to his stomach, and finally down to his crotch. Although I couldn’t see them, I could feel his hard cock and balls and where his cock entered my ass. Then I closed my eyes and said, “Fuck me, stud. Fuck me nice and easy.”
Chad needed no further encouragement and began to slowly piston in and out of me. I felt his cock as he did so, and I groaned loudly as I felt him fuck my ass at the same time as I felt his cock glide back and forth through my fingers. After a short time, I reached up and began to stroke my own cock. With the other hand, I stroked Chad’s furry chest and stomach. Thankfully, this went on for what seemed like an eternity. Chad was taking his time and my ass thanked him for doing so.
After a while, Chad picked up his thrusting speed. Based on the previous times, I knew he wouldn’t be long before cumming, so I increased the stroking speed on my own cock. Apparently that caused me to tighten around him further because he let out a low, deep moan.
As I stroked myself, I began to feel that familiar feeling–the boiling that starts deep within the base of my cock. It built and built as I stroked faster and faster. Chad must have been experiencing the same thing because his breathing got more ragged and uneven as his cock moved quickly in and out of me. I soon reached that point where the pleasure in my cock and in my ass caused me to lose it. Large loads of hot cum came rocketing out of my cock and splattered on my stomach, once, twice, three, four times. I moaned and groaned loudly, and I know my ass contracted even more tightly around Chad’s cock. What seemed like only a second after I started spurting, Chad moaned, said “AHHHHHHH” loudly, and I felt him shoot hot wads deep within me time and time and time again. We were cumming together, I with my hand around my cock and Chad deep within me, my ass wrapped tightly around his cock. The experience was so intense that I didn’t feel anything else around me. All my attention was focused on my cock, my ass, and his cock in my ass.
Eventually Chad’s cock got soft and slipped out of me. He collapsed on the bed beside me, on his back, his eyes closed, with a peaceful and satisfied look on his face. I got a towel and wiped the sweat off his face, chest and stomach, and then cleaned up the sweat and cum from his cock and balls. He didn’t move much during this time and I soon began to hear a rhythmic breathing from him. He had fallen asleep. I grinned and chuckled quietly thinking that I had worn him out. Finally, I got up to go to the bathroom, taking the towel that I had cleaned him with and the towel that had been under me.
After cleaning up, I returned to the bedroom, put on the underwear and t-shirt that I had tossed on the floor earlier, and crawled into bed. I pulled the sheet and blanket up over me and Chad. Chad shifted onto his side facing me but he was still asleep. As I lay down, I took one final look at that perfect face, silently thanking him for coming into my life and hoping he’d stay for a while. Then I reached over and turned off the light for the night. As I turned off the light, I got a quick look at the clock and realized that it was 1:15 in the morning. We’d been going at it for just over four hours, and even with the three hour nap, I was dog tired. With the dark room and warm covers, it seemed like only seconds before I too drifted into a deep and restful sleep.
Saturday, Early Morning
I always hated the first few Saturdays in November after we “fall back” from Daylight Saving Time, and this Saturday was no different. What used to be a leisurely sleep on a Saturday morning was now interrupted by birds chirping and sunlight an hour earlier starting about 5:30 to 6am. On any other day of the week including Sunday, this would have been a welcome event, but Saturdays were my day to sleep late.
Unfortunately, because I had been getting up regularly at 6am for work on all days during the past couple of months, I was unable to sleep through 6am this particular Saturday morning. So, after taking a long look at the guy next to me in bed (and he looked good even in his sleep), I got out of bed and quietly put on my clothes. I left the bedroom, closed the door, and used the second bathroom to take my morning leak so I wouldn’t wake him. Just in case I saw Chad before brushing my teeth, I also used some mouthwash that I kept in the second bathroom.
After taking care of all the personal business, I put on a baseball cap to cover my messy hair, got keys, and went down to the condo building’s front door to get the morning paper. As I returned, I heard rustling around in the bedroom and also heard water running through the pipes as I figured out Chad had used the bathroom. I was fully expecting him to settle back into bed and sleep a little longer, so I was completely unprepared for what happened next.
About thirty seconds later, Chad opened the bedroom door and came down the hall. When I saw him, I was shocked: he was fully dressed including his coat and carrying his gym bag. As he walked past, he had a scowl on his face, said nothing, and continued to the front door to put on his shoes. Obviously he was going to leave, so I hurriedly followed him while trying to figure out what to do next. In a moment of near desperation as he put on his second shoe, I reached out and grabbed an arm and said, “Please don’t leave. Whatever’s got you upset, please, let’s talk about it.” He pulled against my hand a little more but at least he didn’t pull away from me. “I can understand if you’re angry with me for making you hurt. I can also understand if you’re feeling guilty about what we did.” He pulled a little harder. I continued, “I can also understand if you’re feeling panicked about what others will think if they find out what we’ve done. No matter what it is, PLEASE, don’t leave until we talk about it.”
Chad still pulled at my arm, but that’s when I noticed that he had begun to shake. He lowered his head and his voice trembled as he quietly said, “I can’t be gay. I just can’t be.” That’s when I noticed he had started to cry. He dropped his gym bag and put both of his hands up to his face. I reached up to a shoulder to turn him around to give him a hug, but he fought me away. Then he turned to me and yelled, “Don’t you touch me. You’ve taken my virginity from me. That’s something I can never get back, you old fag.”
The comment stunned me and pissed me off at the same time. After a second, I grabbed his coat on both sides near the collar and pushed him up against the wall. Then I positioned myself within about two inches of his face and hissed, “You should be the one to talk about being a fag. You shot your wad FOUR times last night, and THREE of them were in a my ass. And by the way, I shot TWO of my three wads up your ass last night. And you really seemed to enjoy it all, both giving and receiving. So when you talk about losing your virginity to a guy, just remember that you gave it to me willingly and multiple times.”
With a look of defiance, he immediately shot back, “I was drunk and you took advantage of me.”
The comment pissed me even further and I almost hit him. But, I controlled my anger and instead, in a condescending tone of voice, I asked, “Okay, smart ass, so how many beers did you have last night and when did you have them?”
“Three. One at my house and two in the car.”
“You really mean one in the car, because the second one from your car is almost full and still sitting on my kitchen table. I never emptied it from last night.” Then I continued the analysis with an unforgiving voice, “So if the body processes about a beer an hour, then by ten last night you weren’t drunk anymore. And from what I can figure out with us going to sleep around one am, we were in the shower with my dick shooting a wad up your ass about eleven-thirty. So your little theory about being drunk and me taking advantage of you doesn’t hold water, mister. You gave yourself to me and willingly, too.”
The look on Chad’s face changed from defiance to shock. When he finally realized that what I said was true, he closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the wall. Soon after that I noticed tears running down his face. I released the grip on his coat but kept my hands on his chest holding him against the wall. It almost made be break inside seeing the tears and wanting to hold him, but at the same time unwilling to do so because I was still so pissed off. With a raspiness in my voice from the emotions of the moment, I quietly said, “All I want you to do is sit and talk with me for a while. After that you can go. But I really, really don’t want to lose you as a friend, because I value your friendship too much. We don’t have to do anything else ever again, and we can forget that last night ever happened.”
With his eyes shut, he reached up and wiped away the tears. I let go of him and slowly walked into the kitchen, sat down, and had a swig of the beer on the table. It was warm and flat and tasted bad, but I needed something. I sat with my face in my hands, hoping that Chad wouldn’t leave, but it was up to him to make the decision. At this point, I wouldn’t hold him back if he decided to leave.
The longer he waited, the more I got that awful combination of panic and sorrow. It must have been close to five minutes before I heard any major noises from the front hall. When I finally did, it sounded like he was picking up his gym bag and leaving. I prepared for the sound of a door opening and closing, but soon realized that Chad had come into the kitchen carrying his bag. When I looked, he still had his coat on, but at least he hadn’t left. He finally sat down next to me at the table, both of us in the same positions as we had been the night before.
After he sat down at the table and got settled in, I started the conversation. “Thanks for staying. I won’t keep you long, but I need to say some things. Since it’s six-thirty in the morning, I’ll apologize in advance if I ramble or don’t make much sense. If you find it’s too much, please let me know and I’ll either speed up or shut up, and then you can go.” With that last sentence, I looked at Chad. Our eyes met briefly and then he looked down to the table. After a second, I too looked down at the table and continued the monologue. “I said anger, guilt, and panic because those are the emotions that I’ve had when dealing with my feelings about sex, women, and men. After last night you’ll probably have to deal with them, too. For me, the anger comes from that roommate I told you about. One of these days I’ll finally let go of the anger, but it still peeves me that he didn’t keep his part of the deal. Because of that, I always want to make sure that whoever gets fucked by me always gets more in return. That doesn’t make up for me taking your virginity, but I hope you enjoyed riding my ass a few times in the process.” I then looked at Chad directly and said, “I can understand why you’re angry at me, so I apologize for what I did to you. If I had known what I know now, I would gladly turn the clock back to September when we were just good friends, and I would have made sure that this would have never happened. All I can hope is that you won’t be angry with me forever.”
“As for guilt, I’ve felt that plenty of times. I grew up in that part of Texas known as the ‘buckle of the Bible belt’ and every Sunday guilt was part of the sermon. Churches there regularly emphasized the teaching that if there’s a part of your body that’s doing wrong, then cut it off. Given that I consider my dick to be a major part of my health and well-being, that wasn’t practical to do.” That seemed to get a little chuckle out of Chad, so I continued. “Rather than admit that some guys turn me on, I’ve suppressed it all of my life. Having those feelings, even when I was married, has always made me feel guilty. Now I feel guilty for having done something wrong to you. I feel guilty for letting all this happen. But I’ll handle like I always have–after a while the guilt seems to go away on its own. And believe it or not, as I’ve grown older and understand religion more, it has also helped me handle the guilt. So if you ever want more details in that area, just ask.”
I continued, “Before I get to panic, I need to address being straight or gay. A few years ago I found a medical journal article that explained something for me. It stated that sexuality is like a ruler with straight people on one end and gay people on the other end, and each person’s sexual tendencies fit somewhere on the ruler. Many are preprogrammed to be exclusively at the straight end, some are preprogrammed to be exclusively at the gay end, and the rest are somewhere between the two. Not a big deal, except that this article went on to explain that recent research and surveys show that a fair number of men seem to move around on the ruler based on the situation they’re in. The researcher went as far as to say that if you’re a guy and you’ve ever admired the body of another guy, then you’re not 100% straight. You’re probably not gay, but you’re not straight either. After reading that I began have some hope for how I’ve felt most of my life.”
Now I looked directly at Chad, who met my eyes this time. “So are you now gay? I certainly don’t think so. However, based on the fun you and I had last night, we both know that you’re not 100% straight either. Where you finally land on the ruler is up to you. Based on what’s happened this morning, I think you’ll end up on the straight end of the ruler and you’ll try to forget last night ever happened. Now, where am I on this ruler? Let me first say that I loved my wife, and I love the soft, smooth, silky feeling of women, and how they can wrap those legs, bodies, and vaginas around you and transport you somewhere else during sex. So I used to think of myself as being straight. But over time, I’ve also found that the rough and tumble hardness and hairiness of certain guys turns me on. I look at straight, bi-sexual, and gay porn on the Internet. So where do I fit on the ruler? I’m not really sure, but now I think that I’m somewhere in the middle and I tend to move around a lot. But does that mean I pounce on every guy who wants to go to bed with me? No, but in special cases, I have gone to bed with a guy. And when I say ‘special’, I mean that I can count the number of guys I’ve been to bed with on one hand,” and I held up three fingers. “After the asshole roommate, I’ve been selective about who I let into my life and very selective about who gets into my bed. Robert’s a great guy and a fantastic fuck, but he hasn’t grown up yet and I really don’t want a thirty-something year old kid in my life right now. Maybe that will change in the future based on what he’s told you and me, but I’m waiting to see if that’s really going to happen. However, you on the other hand. . . .” I paused and then continued, “You’re smart, too good looking and you seem to have your act together. You’re the complete package, and that combination, well, let’s just say I have a real problem controlling how I feel about you. I just hope you’ll give me some time to reign in my feelings and give me a second chance as a friend.”
I looked back down at the table and continued. “As for our age difference. . . . I don’t have any real answers for that one. Yes, I am older than you. Quite a bit older. And I’m sorry for ever starting something between us. No, I take that back. I’m not sorry for starting something between us, I’m sorry that I had to be so much older. You make me feel younger than I am, and maybe I should just learn to grow old gracefully rather than try to live through a younger guy. But you’re special to me and I hope that you’ll not completely reject me because of the age thing.”
After a longer pause, I continued. “Finally, panic. Panic is defined as ‘an overwhelming feeling of fear and anxiety.’ Since I know the definition, you can probably guess that I’ve had to deal with this feeling at least a couple of times. This is the hardest emotion for me to control, and it seems that talking with someone or drinking a case of beer are about the only ways for me to control it.” Chad chucked at the case of beer comment and when I glanced at him, he seemed a little more relaxed. “That’s why I wanted you to stay and talk a while. When I talk through the panic, it helps me understand what’s causing it and how I can cope with it. I’m sure there are other ways to handle this, but this is what has worked for me.”
“I’ve panicked a number of times in my life. I panicked a couple of times when my parents caught me jacking off in the bathroom as a teenager. I panicked in my twenties when I realized that my differences might force me to live alone for a long time. I’ve panicked a couple of times when my wife nearly caught me looking at some gay porn on the Internet. I’ve panicked another couple of times when you’ve caught me looking at you a little too long, and I hoped that you wouldn’t file some kind of lawsuit against me. Today I panicked when I saw you leaving. Unfortunately, this time I pretty much assaulted you to get you to stay, so I apologize for that, too. I’m sort of panicked now because your friendship is important to me and I don’t want to lose that. In the past, I’m pretty certain that you’ve panicked some over your marital situation, and God knows that I was incredibly panicked when two state troopers came to tell me that my family had been. . . .” And then I realized what I had done to myself. All of the sudden, wave after wave of sadness came crashing down on me. I looked up at the ceiling and tried to control it but couldn’t. The tears welled up in my eyes and, not wanting Chad to see this, I excused myself from the table. I walked into the kitchen, put my hands on the counter and held my head down between my arms. I wanted the feelings to go away, but the tears continued to flow as the images replayed in my head: the troopers, the hospital, the funeral, the cemetery, the rest of my family at the wake afterwards, and, finally, the empty house.
After a few moments, I noticed Chad’s warm body next to me, moving me into a position with my arms over his shoulders and his arms around my middle. I heard the all too familiar words come from his mouth, “Let it go, bud. Let it go.” The pressure and stress of work, the real possibility of losing a close friend, and the lack of sleep had hit me like the proverbial ton of bricks. I got lost in the warmth and security of Chad’s hug, so I leaned into him, hugged him hard, and cried for what must have been a long time.
As I slowly regained my senses, I pulled away from Chad, got some paper towels to dry my eyes and blow my nose. I leaned against the kitchen counter next to Chad, and said, “Sorry to drag you into this. I was supposed to let you talk, not have you deal with my emotional baggage.”
Chad simply responded, “That’s what friends are for,” and smiled one of his megawatt smiles.
After I had recovered somewhat, I asked, “So, how are you?”
He replied, “I’m good. You’ve given me some things to think about.”
I paused for Chad to say something else, and when he didn’t, I had to ask, “You’re a man of few words aren’t you?”
He replied seriously, “Why spoil the silence when a look will do the same thing?”
After a second, I chuckled, looked straight into his eyes, and said, “If you had brown eyes instead of blue, I’d swear that you must be full of shit.” We both burst out laughing and Chad punched me pretty hard on the shoulder. I had insulted him, but he had left himself open for it.
He asked, “Okay, since we’re being cocky today, what’s the baseball cap for?
“To cover my messy hair so I wouldn’t scare you this morning. Obviously it didn’t work,” I replied with a grin.
“Take it off. I like your hair just the way it is,” he replied.
With a twinkle in my eye and a sly grin on my face, I said, “Only when you take off and give me your shirt so I don’t have to look at how wet I got your shoulder.”
Chad saw my sly grin and got a sly grin of his own. He walked out of the kitchen and around the corner to his gym bag, got another t-shirt and changed. He was out of sight (and he knew it), but I could envision what he was doing. After a short moment, I regretted having the thought and realized that those kinds of thoughts would have to stop from now on.
He returned to the kitchen with a new t-shirt on. He handed the old t-shirt to me and said, “A deal is a deal.” So I took off the baseball cap, sloppily folded the shirt, put both together, and set them down on the counter.
As Chad looked at my hair, he got this silly ass grin on his face. I knew what he was looking at: as I sleep, my hair seems to get pushed up on the sides and the result is that I look like I have horns. I reached up and felt around and, yep, they were there. So I had to say, “Either I’m a pointy haired boss or a horny devil. It’s your choice.” We both laughed, but Chad didn’t say anything.
After a while, I got serious and finally worked up the courage to ask, “Are we still friends?”
After a short pause, Chad replied, “Yes . . . and we always will be.”
I looked at Chad and he returned the gaze. I wanted to kiss him right then, but I hadn’t been given the clearance to do so, so I stayed put. Instead I simply said, “Thanks.”
After another short pause, I changed the subject by asking, “Before you leave, would you like some breakfast?”
Chad looked down at the floor and got a serious, far-away look on his face. A short time later, he looked back up at me and said, “I think we both need a light breakfast. Then we need to get back into bed, get some more sleep, and see how waking up a second time this morning makes us feel. Plus I need some aspirin or something. I just realized that I’ve got a hangover, and that’s probably part of why I’ve been such an ass this morning.”
I found the ibuprofen bottle in the cabinet nearby and gave it to Chad. As he got the pills out of the bottle, I got a glass of water for him. I noticed that he took three. After he swallowed the pills, he got out two more and handed them to me, saying, “By the way, ibuprofen, Tylenol PM, and a good sleep have helped me deal with my recent panics.” I tried to look at his eyes, but he turned to avoid my look. I thought to myself that I’d have to corner him on the comment later.
We had our light breakfast and made our way back to the bedroom. At the thermostat, Chad stopped and asked if I could lower the temperature to 70 or 68 or something near there. I set it to 68 and we continued on our way. After brushing our teeth, we stripped down to t-shirts and underwear and crawled into bed laying on our sides facing each other. The room was brighter than earlier with the light from outside, but the blinds and curtains kept it from being too bright. Getting all warm and comfortable in the sheets along with being happy that Chad was staying, I found myself drifting off to sleep quickly. Before I closed my eyes for the last time, I made sure that the last image I saw was Chad looking back at me.
Saturday, Afternoon and Evening
After what seemed like only a few moments, I felt movement in the bed next to me. I heard quiet noises in the bathroom, and then felt movement in the bed again. I was still in the same position as I had fallen asleep in, and the sheet and blanket were nestled snugly around me thanks to Chad. I slowly opened my eyes to the same image that I had gone to sleep with, except this time Chad had a big smile on his face.
“Welcome back, sleepy head. It’s about time you woke up,” he said.
I asked groggily, “What time is it?”
“It’s about noon and you’ve been asleep for almost four and half hours.”
Perking up only a little, I asked, “How long have you been awake?”
“For a while,” Chad replied.
“Okaaaaay, define ‘a while’,” I said.
“About an hour to an hour and a half.”
“Geez, you could have woken me up.”
After a pause, he said, “No, I couldn’t. You looked so peaceful and relaxed. And besides, I needed the time to do some thinking.”
“That could be dangerous,” I said grinning back at him.
“Fuck you,” he said.
“The thought had crossed my mind,” I said playfully.
“Maybe in a little while, but I have some questions first.” After a pause, he continued, “So, what kind of relationship do you and Robert have?”
I groaned, rolled from my side onto my back and asked, “Why do you have to hit me with all the difficult stuff so soon after I’ve woken up?”
“Well, since I’m new to this type of relationship I need some more information before I can proceed, and I figure that two healthy specimens like you and Robert should provide me with plenty of information.”
“Fuck you,” I grumbled.
“We’ll get to that soon, too. So?”
“Okay, okay. How much detail do you want to know?” I asked.
“As much as you’re willing to give me, starting with how you two met,” he said.
“Okay, here goes. In early-January, Robert and I were playing a game of racquetball when he decided to take his t-shirt off. I was winning for once, and being the type of guy I am, I couldn’t let him keep his shirt off otherwise I’d be distracted by his body and lose the game. I asked him to put his shirt back on and he refused. After losing a couple of serves, I asked him again and he refused again. That’s when I threw him up against the wall and told him to put his shirt back on. Surprisingly he did, but by then I was already too distracted. Of course he won, and I was a little steamed. Afterwards he asked why I did what I did. I told him that his body was a distraction. He didn’t quite get it, so I told him that I wasn’t gay but I wasn’t straight either, and that he had quite a body. He finally got it.” I added as I looked over at Chad, “By the way, you can’t ever play a game against me with your shirt off.”
“In the middle of January, we had a big snow storm on a Friday into a Saturday. I had been there practicing, and as I was about to leave, I noticed that it had snowed about two inches during the hour I had been there and it was continuing to snow heavily. I looked at the parking lot and saw only two cars. It seems that everyone else had left the club before it got too bad. I also noticed that Robert’s car was completely covered because he had been there most of the day. I almost left without saying anything, but got a guilty feeling that he’d probably have to spend the night at the club because he had stayed open for me to practice. So I went back in and offered him the spare bed and bathroom for the night. He turned me down, but I asked him to look at the snow. When he realized the situation, he accepted my offer with some hesitance.”
“While here we talked about lots of things. Eventually, he asked some questions about our encounter in the racquetball court and gay sex, which I answered. One thing led to another and he asked if we could do something together. I asked about his history and after hearing about all the sexual conquests (all women, except for a blowjob that he’d gotten anonymously in a gay movie theater), I said that he’d have to get fully tested by his doctor before I’d go any further with him. I also told him that he’d have to enema himself before we did anything just to make sure everything was clean. He seemed a little pissed at me for what I wanted him to do. Maybe I was the first to turn him down, but I’ve never asked. That night I heard him beat off in the guest room and I know he was being noisy on purpose. Since it sounded like he was having a good time, I did the same. Probably never dawned on him that I would do that, but we’ve never discussed that either. About noon the next day when the roads had been plowed, I took him back to the club. I never expected to hear anything about it again. Maybe hoping that something would happen, I got tested anyway. It’s always good to know for sure, and I had never been tested before then.”
“At the very end of January, Robert called me into his office. Like you, he showed me a piece of paper. It was an STD test sheet that had all negatives on it. Then he told me that if we had another big snow storm over a weekend in February, then I should prepare myself because we’d be getting to know each other pretty well on that weekend. Well, about two weeks later, we had another big snow storm on Friday into Saturday. I had prepared myself not expecting anything to happen, but he cornered me as I came out of the racquetball court. We came back here and, as I like to say it, we got to know better. That first weekend was a little difficult for both of us and we didn’t do it too much, but the exposure to sex between us set the tone for what was to follow.”
“About every month since then, we’ve gotten together and done each other. Basically, there’s not a whole lot of emotional attachment between the two of us, and we pretty much use each other for the sex. In July, we started kissing and that added another dimension to the relationship. Now, given what he’s told you and me recently, I’m not sure where our relationship stands, but I’m not holding my breath.” I looked over at Chad and completed my description. “By the way, Robert and I haven’t had sex since July because you came into the picture. I know he’s pissed about that, but until you came along, he hadn’t committed to any serious relationship.”
He looked at me and then looked down at the bed and asked, “When you two get together, about how many times do you have sex during the weekend?”
“Geez, you’re not going to make this easy, are you?” I asked.
“It will get easier,” Chad responded.
“Okay, this is not bragging and I’m not saying all guys are like this, but during a Friday night to Sunday afternoon weekend stay, usually I get about six to eight shots into him and he gets about eight to ten in me. On some of those weekends, we’ve had to do hand jobs instead, but generally it’s about that many times total for each. Usually we’re like two animals in heat, and it seems that neither of us can get enough of the other. July was a little different with the kissing and the hammock on the deck that we each had an extra two or three shots.”
“Wow.” Chad said quietly.
I turned back on my side, looked him in the eye, and said, “But we don’t have to try to keep up with that score. I prefer quality to quantity myself.”
He shifted uneasily in the bed and said, “But it would be nice to try,” and then flashed one of his grins. We both chuckled at the thought.
“With you, I could do just about anything.” I added after a short pause.
After looking at each other for a short time, Chad looked back down at the bed and continued by saying, “Now for my final question. How are you two able to do it so much?”
I paused for a moment and then said, “I’m not sure what’s going on in my ass, but at least for me, not only does rubbing my prostate feel really good, but after a while, it also makes me want to fuck someone. It may all be mental, but I’m thinking there’s something physical to it too. Seems this is also the effect on Robert because when we get going, we seem to wear each other out before the urge to fuck each other goes away. I don’t know if you’ve felt the same thing, but you don’t have to. I would enjoy just being around you on the weekends . . . or more often.”
About a minute passed with Chad squirming around a lot in bed. The conversation seemed to be having some effect on him. I waited him out, because I knew he was thinking about something. Finally he looked over at me and said, “I’m not completely sure what my ass is feeling physically, but . . . I need you to fuck me.”
Given what had happened earlier that day, I was kind of surprised by the statement. But also given that we were both in bed, I wasn’t surprised either. I looked directly into Chad’s eyes and asked, “Are you sure you want to do this?”
After a short pause, he simply said, “Yes.” Then he added with a grin, “and this time I won’t try to press charges,” which made both of us laugh some.
“Now I have to ask something. Am I to treat you like Robert and I treat each other or is there a possibility that we might become more than just sex partners?”
Chad thought for a moment and then responded, “I know what you’re asking and that’s something I was thinking about while you were asleep. All of this is so new to me that I can’t say right now if we can be anything beyond being sex partners, and very secret ones at that. There’s my family, there are the people at work, and there are some friends that won’t understand, at least not initially. So can we treat each other as sex partners at least for right now?”
I thought to myself that this is not what I wanted to hear, but I could put myself in his shoes. He had a tough time in front of him dealing with what was going on now and what would be in the future, and I shouldn’t interfere with that. For that matter, I’d have some of the same problems, so I couldn’t complain. So, no matter what I wanted, I’d have to deal with us being just sex partners. I responded, “I can deal with that. I’ll tell you now that I’d like more, but the sex is great so why should I complain,” which got a grin from Chad.
I sat up in bed, slipped off my t-shirt and underwear, and tossed them on the floor. I was already hard from the conversation. The covers were still over Chad, so I slowly pulled them back. After pulling the covers down to his waist, I realized that he was already naked. I looked at Chad and he blushed. I grinned and said, “Someone was already planning something I see.” Then I pulled the covers completely off him. I could see that his cock was hard so I gently put my hand around it and gave it a few tugs. He closed his eyes and moaned. After a few moments I let go and said, “Raise and hold up your legs.” He did so, and I moved into position near his hairy ass. Just as he had done, I lightly rubbed the hair all over his ass, legs and balls. After receiving a few moans from the effort, I centered my efforts on his ass muscle. I did what I had done the night before: first, the single finger massaging his muscle, which was already somewhat loose; second, two fingers reaching up and deep looking for and finding his prostate; and third, three fingers to stretch him. All the while Chad kept his eyes closed and was moaning from fucking my fingers were giving his ass.
After finding that he was loose enough, I moved closer, the insides of my thighs touching the sides of his butt. I pulled my fingers from his ass and rubbed the lube on my cock. Then I moved forward, put my cock to his ass, and slowly pushed in. As my cockhead popped past his ass muscle, he arched his back and groaned loudly. His face also showed that he was either in pain or in great pleasure, so I asked, “Are you okay?”
After a few seconds, he replied, “Damn you’re big.”
“Do I need to pull out?”
“No. The pleasure and pain are mixed right now, but go ahead and push in.”
I slowly slid my cock nearly all the way into his ass. As I did, I felt the insides of his ass gently move out of the way and then settle back around my cock for a tighter fit. I was thinking that this was going to be a really good fuck if I could keep from shooting too soon. I then began to slowly piston in and out of him. He groaned his approval, and I felt his ass muscle loosen a little. Soon he opened his eyes to get a look at what was going on. A couple of seconds later, as the sight registered, I felt him tighten his ass muscle around me, sending what felt like a mild electric shock through my cock and into the rest of my body.
Chad then partially sat up on one elbow and used the other hand to stroke my chest and stomach for a while. I stopped moving as he did this and began to moan. As he stroked my stomach hair, he looked down at my cock and balls and where my cock entered his ass. His hand roamed from my stomach down to my balls and he gave them a light squeeze. He ran his finger along my cock and felt where it entered his ass. Finally, he wrapped his middle finger and thumb around my cock about an inch out from his ass and said, “Fuck me slowly. I want to feel what it’s like inside and out as you do me.” So I started the slow pistoning again. The feeling was like nothing I had felt before. His ass muscle was tight around me and so were his fingers. It almost felt like he had two ass muscles. I had been watching what he had been doing, but the intensity was beginning to get to me. I had closed my eyes, leaned my head back, and had been moaning loudly. Chad had noticed, so he reached up, rubbed my chest and said, “Stop for a minute, take some deep breaths, and settle down some. I want you hard in me for a while.”
Breathlessly I said, “Not sure how long I can wait. It’s been almost twelve hours since we did anything.”
“You can handle it big guy, just take some deep breaths and relax some,” he said as he continued to rub my chest.
To try to take my mind off what his ass was doing to my cock, I repositioned his legs and my arms. Since Chad was right handed, I held his right leg out from his body, my arm under his knee and pointed away from my body. This way Chad had free access to his cock. For his left leg, I put my arm around the outside of his leg and then underneath so that my hand could rest against my stomach. That position gave me some more stability so that I could control how I thrust into him.
With the new positioning, Chad took his hand away from my chest and starting slowly stroking his cock. Looking down to see what he was doing and feeling his ass muscle tighten around my cock as he stroked himself, I reminded myself to stroke him the next time we did a stand-up fuck. The contractions around my cock were incredible. Soon I couldn’t help myself any longer and I began to slowly piston in and out of him again. Chad lay back down on the bed, closed his eyes, and started moaning and groaning with the pleasure that I knew he was feeling, both in his ass and in his cock. I also felt pretty good with the tightness of his ass muscle around my cock.
We both continued at the same speed for what felt like a long time, neither of us wanting to give up the pleasure of the moment. However, soon I felt an urgency in the situation, so I said, “I’m getting close. You need to speed up.” With that little bit of encouragement, Chad began stroking his cock faster and faster until his hand looked like a blur to me. I picked up my thrusting speed, and both of us began to moan and groan louder and longer. Soon his ass was alternating between clenching me and trying to push me out, and my cock got harder from this manipulation. After a short time, his breathing got ragged and irregular and he began to arch his back. I felt that wonderful boiling feeling begin in the base of my cock. Soon, Chad said, “Oh fuck, Oh FUCK!” and moaned loudly. Then I felt his ass muscle clench around my cock really hard, and his cock shot a huge wad on his chest followed by smaller wads all over his stomach. That tripped me at the same time, and I shot wads deep into his ass, each splashing around inside him. I got lost in the sensation of his ass clenching around me and my cock spurting inside him, and it seemed to go on forever.
After a short while, both of our cocks began to get soft. I tried to keep mine in Chad’s ass, but eventually it slipped out. With that, I carefully let his legs down and collapsed on the bed beside him. After another couple of minutes, I reached for a couple of towels to clean us off. I wiped off my cock and then turned to Chad and began to clean him off. I worked on his chest and stomach and then carefully cleaned off his cock. As I finished, I happened to glance up at Chad’s face and noticed that he was staring at me.
“What?” I asked.
He got a slight grin on his face and said, “Damn, you’re good. You know exactly what turns me on.”
I grinned back and responded, “Helps that you’re a quick learner.”
He murmured something like, “Helps that you’re a talented teacher.”
I watched as Chad closed his eyes, and I soon noticed that his breathing was regular. I had to chuckle to myself as I thought, “He fucks and falls asleep immediately after. Typical of most guys.” Instantly I also felt guilty for having such a thought because I remembered that he hadn’t slept as much as I had earlier. So I carefully got out of bed, put my clothes on quietly, and left the bedroom so he could sleep some more.
While Chad slept, I did some minor chores. I pulled some steaks from the freezer and put in the fridge so they could start thawing for Sunday night’s dinner. I got soup out of the cabinet and set on the counter so that I’d be ready for lunch or an afternoon snack depending on when Chad woke up. Then I went to the one bedroom that I had converted into a study and did some work. My brain wasn’t into it, as I was really thinking about how good the sex had been with Chad. But I at least tried to keep busy for a while.
About an hour and a half later, I heard noises in the master bathroom, and soon Chad came into the study. He had put on all his clothes since the condo was now getting a little chilly. Finding a chair, he plopped down in it and grinned at me.
I had to comment. “Obviously you had a good nap.” You look much happier than you did several hours ago.”
Realizing what I had said, Chad leaned his head back and said sarcastically, “Gee thanks for reminding me.” Shortly he added with a hint of regret in his voice, “I am so sorry about that. I don’t know what got into me.”
“No need to apologize. I got carried away, too,” as I looked at the floor. Then I looked at Chad and said, “But there isn’t anything that we can’t work out together.” After a long pause, I asked, “So what do you want to do for the rest of the day?”
“First off, I’m hungry. Second, I want to find out more about what you and Robert do on a weekend like this.”
“Okay. First, for lunch, I have soup and crackers along with a sports drink. And we’ll discuss the second over lunch.”
With a slight whine to his voice, Chad responded, “Soup for lunch? I was hoping for something like a steak or a big burger.”
“Steak is on the menu for tomorrow’s late afternoon meal just before you go home.”
After a few seconds pause, Chad said, “Well, okay, but these light meals aren’t enough for me. I’m burning a lot of calories doing . . . you know. . . .”
“Doing me?” I asked.
Chad chuckled, “Yes, you, and you doing me, too.”
I responded, “I know. They’re not keeping me from getting hungry either, but six hours after we eat a normal meal, we have to start using condoms just in case something processes through us that quickly. The alternative is to stop screwing each other and I think we’re enjoying that too much to stop now.”
“Well, I could eat normal meals and you could stay on light meals,” Chad said with a big grin.
“Fuck you,” I said.
“I thought we were going to discuss that over lunch,” Chad responded.
Laughingly I said, “Okay, okay.” I got up and nodded for Chad to follow me to the kitchen. As we got there, I showed him milk, sodas, and juices to drink, and let him choose either vegetable, chicken noodle, or tomato soup. He chose chicken noodle and a soda, and I chose the same soup and cranberry juice. He looked at me for the interesting combination, and told him that I sometimes have different tastes, in food as well as sex partners, and that got another laugh out of him.
As we sat down to eat lunch, the conversation turned to what Robert and I did on weekends like this. I told Chad, “We do whatever comes to mind. Some of it is fast and exciting, some of it is slow and steady, some of it is a bit rough maybe bordering on rape, and some is just using each other as a sex toy to get our rocks off. But through all of this, two conditions have to be met. First, the other has to agree to it. The agreement doesn’t have to be verbal, so you don’t have to ask. But if I push your hand away or shift away from what you might be trying to push me to do, then I’m not agreeing. So far, neither Robert nor I has turned down the other. We both allow the other to do pretty much whatever he wants to do. The second condition is that the act itself has to be doable by both of us. In other words, if you do me in a particular position, then you have to be willing to let me do you in the same position. That way neither of us has a particular experience that the other won’t or can’t have. Sometimes the excitement has been in waiting to be on the other end of whatever we are doing at that moment.”
Chad then asked, “So, do you do everything in bed, just different positions?”
I laughed and said, “Just like any other straight or gay couple, Robert and I have done it in just about every room in this condo.”
Chad’s eyes got wide and he asked, “Every room?”
“Just about. I think the only places we haven’t are the second bathroom and the closets,” I responded.
“But what have you actually done?” he asked.
“Well, here are some of the things we’ve done. In the kitchen, we’ve had stand-up sex like in the shower, all while waiting for something to cook. The treadmill and weight machine are in the third bedroom, and the bench for the weight machine is about the right height, if you know what I mean. And the floor in front of the TV has been used a lot, especially while viewing DVDs. I have some old blankets for that so that neither of us gets rug burn. And the computer in the study is connected to the Internet. So pretty much whatever you can think of, we can do.”
Chad stared at me and was speechless. His mouth was partway open and I couldn’t help myself, so I reached over and slowly pushed his jaw up to close his mouth. Then he blushed and looked down at the table. After a few moments I asked, “Is everything alright?”
“Yeah. I was just thinking about what we could do first.” Chad said.
After a pause, I asked “Aaaaaaand?” trying to get Chad to elaborate.
After a few seconds, Chad responded, “I’ve always wondered what it would feel like to exercise without clothes on.”
“Okay. So what do you do to satisfy your curiosity? And don’t say it in words. If you want me to participate, then lead me to where you want to go and show me what you want to do. Then the rest of the weekend will be just us satisfying our curiosity or fulfilling a fantasy.”
After a few seconds, Chad looked over at me, got up out of his chair, reached over and tugged on my arm. I got up and followed him into the bedroom that had the exercise equipment. On the way there I started to get hard from the anticipation.
As we got into the bedroom where the treadmill and weight machine were, I gave Chad some overview of how to work them both. The weight machine was one of those that you dial in the resistance and it sets up everything for you. With a big grin on my face, I said, “Since you had such a problem with the shower, I thought I’d give you some instruction on this first.”
“Oh, fuck you,” Chad said.
“I’m sure you will soon enough,” I replied. “So what’s next?”
Chad looked over at me and took off his shirt, exposing the hairy physique that always turned me on so much. He looked over at me to make sure I was watching, and then he took off everything else, exposing a hairy crotch and a semi-hard cock that pointed down at a forty-five degree angle. After taking a good look at him, I did the same thing. As I looked back at him, his cock had gotten harder, now pointing straight out from his body. All I could think was that it wouldn’t be long before that monster would be stuck in my ass again.
We went through a repetition of several exercises, not the usual three sets for each exercise, but more of something to enjoy looking at each other’s muscles in motion. As I moved into position to do the bench press, little did I know that the bench press would be the last exercise we did with, but not on, the machine that weekend.
As I did my repetitions on the bench press, I wasn’t paying attention and Chad ran the palm of his hand over my cock. The action surprised me and my legs instinctively came up to protect me. As soon as I recognized what had happened, I put my legs back down and said, “Sorry. I wasn’t expecting that.” Then I looked at Chad. He had a hungry look on his face and his cock was even harder than before. I looked back up at the ceiling, took a couple of deep breaths and lifted my legs, exposing my ass to Chad. He needed no further encouragement and was soon fingering my ass. After a few more moments, I felt the heat of his cockhead at my ass. He pushed into me, my ass muscle not willing to let him in at first, but soon it yielded allowing his cock plunge all the way into me in one, quick stroke. Because of the suddenness of it all, I yelped and winced in pain. The pain from the intrusion was moderate, and it made my eyes tear up some. I was surprised that Chad would do this to me, but remembered the hungry look on his face just a few moments ago. I soon realized that he needed to fuck me as much as I needed him to fuck me.
While waiting for my ass to get used his cock, Chad repositioned himself by spreading his legs a little more to get a better alignment. He also leaned against the bar that I had used for the bench press. The machine held the bar in position about two feet above me, a position that was great for both of us because I could now reach up and stroke Chad’s hairy chest and stomach. Soon I wrapped my legs around his waist, and he began to slowly piston in and out of me. As he slowly fucked me, I couldn’t believe how quickly the pain turned to an intense pleasure, his cock slowly rubbing the insides of my ass and that huge purple cockhead rubbing against my prostate.
After a while, I decided to try something with Chad that I had never tried before: I stopped rubbing his chest, unlocked my feet from around his waist and used my hands to hold my legs away from his body. Now the only parts of our bodies touching each other were his cock and my ass. I wasn’t perfect and my legs touched him every so often, but the feeling was more intense than I ever expected. I looked up at Chad to see if he was paying attention and I saw him looking down where his cock entered my ass. After a short while, he looked up at me and our eyes locked. I really wanted to tell him that I loved him, but I didn’t dare spoil the moment. Instead I said, “Fuck me, bud, fuck me hard.”
Chad responded by closing his eyes and picking up the pace of his thrusting to a medium speed. We continued in that position for a few minutes, and soon my body began to move up and down on the bench in time with his thrusting. After a while he began to thrust into me harder, with an intensity that I had not seen and felt before. Though it did hurt some, the pain was mixed with an incredible pleasure that I didn’t want to stop. I also tried to time the squeezes of my ass muscle so that I’d be squeezing as he pulled back and looser as he pushed in. His moans and groans indicated that what I was doing was turning him on.
Chad soon shifted into high gear and fucked me really hard, so hard that his cock thrust too deep into my ass, which already hurting somewhat from the depth of his earlier thrusts. I tried pushing against his stomach some to let him know he was going too deep, but that only encouraged him to fuck me harder. Still keeping my legs apart, I put my hands over my ass cheeks to keep him from going in so deep. He responded by fucking me so hard and fast that I thought he was raping me. I couldn’t tell, but I was hoping it was someone in his imagination instead of me. I could tell from the moaning, closed eyes, and head thrown back that he was about to release another big load into my ass, and that kind of excited me because of the domination. But at the same time, I hoped that he would cum soon because my ass couldn’t take this too much longer.
I clenched tightly around his cock, and he loudly groaned “FUUUUUCK YOOOUUUU.” He pushed deeply into me and I could feel the pulsing start in his cock, hot cum spurting deep into my ass again and again and again. Soon he began to slow down and finally he stopped, his cock still deep inside me. After a while he caught his breath, opened his eyes, and looked down at me with a serious, far away look on his face. He wasn’t really seeing me as he looked at me, so I interrupted the trance by saying, “You’ve been wanting to do that to someone for a while haven’t you?” The trance-like look went away and was replaced with a noncommittal look. After a few more seconds, it appeared that he realized what had happened, because he blushed and turned away. After a while, he turned back to look at me. I reached up and stroked the side of his sweaty face at the same time thinking that I’d have to ask him about this later.
Just about that time, Chad’s cock had grown soft and it slipped out of me. He pushed himself back to a standing position and offered a hand to pull me up. As I stood, I realized that I had to go to the bathroom because of the large load he had shot in me. So I excused myself and hurried off. As I walked, I hoped that he wouldn’t be repeating that anytime soon because the whole insides of my ass now hurt pretty badly.
Chad followed a few minutes later, coming into the bathroom and leaning against the counter. Soon he asked, “You said something about DVDs. Are they in the study with all the other DVDs?”
“Not the type of DVDs that Robert and I look at, well, at least not on this type of weekend,” I replied.
“So, where do you keep those?” Chad asked.
“I keep them hidden in the closet on a shelf in the back left corner. You can go look at them if you wish.”
Chad left the bathroom and I heard him open the door to the large walk-in closet that served the master bedroom. Then I heard him pushing aside the clothes in the closet to get to the shelf. I finished in the bathroom and joined him about thirty seconds later. As I entered the closet, he was looking through the DVD collection one by one, looking at the guys on the front cover and what they were doing on the back. Seeing the nice view of his back, I walked up behind him, wrapped my arms around his waist, and leaned into him, my chest and stomach against his back. My cock, now soft and pointed down, nestled itself nicely between his butt cheeks. While he looked, I stroked the hair on his chest and stomach and kept us pulled together.
Chad moved around some as he worked his way through the collection, and every movement caused his ass crack to move around and massage my cock. Because of the closeness, I also began to notice the sexy smell of his body. These two sensory inputs along with my hands rubbing through the hair on his chest and stomach slowly made me hard again. After a short time, I noticed that Chad had stopped looking at the DVDs and was looking at me as I looked over his shoulder at the DVDs. I blushed, turned my eyes away from him, and guiltily said, “Sorry bud. But you really turn me on.”
Without a word, Chad put the two DVDs he was holding onto the shelf, spread his legs and leaned forward, supporting himself against one of the middle shelves in the bookshelf and giving me easy access to his ass. With one hand on his back for support, I used the other hand to guide my cockhead to his asshole and slowly push into him. As my cockhead popped past the ass muscle, Chad threw his head back and groaned loudly. I pushed into him, slowly, inch by inch, until my cock was completely in. I moved my hands to his hips and began to fuck him, slowly, in and out, in and out, until we were both moaning from the coupling. This fuck seemed different and then I realized that Chad had silently given himself to me, maybe to make up for what he had done to me earlier. That thought alone made me harder, and I began to pick up speed. Also, I noticed that Chad was moving and keeping rhythm with my movements. I took my hands off his hips and put them on the clothes rod above him. The change in position put me about three inches above Chad, all the way from my chin, down my chest and stomach, to the point where my cock entered him. Just like the weight bench fuck, we were touching only where my cock entered Chad’s ass, but this time we could feel the heat of each other’s body nearby. And to heighten the pleasure, my chest and stomach hair rubbed his back every so often as we fucked.
Soon I realized that Chad was driving this show and I had to do nothing but stand there and let his ass squeeze my cock as he moved back and forth on it. As he alternated between squeezing my cock and trying to push it out, I got harder and harder. He began to moan louder and louder and picked up the speed of his movements back and forth, faster and faster on each stroke. Soon I closed my eyes and just experienced the feeling of hot, wet, slippery tightness around my cock, along with hearing the moans and groans not only from Chad, but from me as well. Soon, that all too familiar boiling feeling began in the base of my cock. “I’m about to cum,” I told Chad hoarsely. I almost couldn’t believe it, but he started bucking even faster than before while squeezing tightly around my cock. Within seconds, I gritted my teeth and stifled a yell as my cock shot load after load, deep into his ass, all while Chad continued his bucking motions.
Soon I realized that I needed to stop Chad. Even after I had stopped cumming, he had become almost uncontrollable in his movements, and I really didn’t want him to accidentally bend my rapidly softening cock. I reached my arms around him, pulled him to me tightly, leaned close to his ear and softly said, “Whoa, bud, whoa. Time to slow down and take a rest.” He slowed down and finally stopped, and my cock slipped out shortly after that. We stood up straight, my arms wrapped tightly around him, and he leaned his head backwards onto my shoulder, panting and trying to recover from all the activity. He kept his eyes closed during this time, and I was wondering what he was thinking and feeling. As I stroked his chest and stomach, he slowly recovered and came back to reality. When he straightened his head up, he tried to pull away from me.
“Stay here a few more moments,” I said, keeping him pulled to me.
“But I need to go sit.”
I said, “Don’t worry about the carpet. It cleans up. I want to make sure that you’re okay.”
After cooling down for another couple of minutes, Chad finally relaxed and leaned against me. Then he said, “I’m okay now. I just got carried away with the really, really intense feeling.”
“A feeling like all of the insides of your ass want to be rubbed along with your prostate and ass muscle?”
I chuckled quietly and said, “Then I have to be careful about how I fuck you the rest of today. I certainly didn’t expect you to get to this stage so quickly.”
“What stage is that?” he asked.
“I’m not sure what it’s really called if it’s called anything, but I call it the I-can’t-get-fucked-enough stage. That’s okay, but you don’t want to do it standing up. You want to do it laying down with someone who makes sure you don’t go too far.”
“‘Too far’, what do you mean by that?” he asked.
“The pushing and the movement is like an intense exercise that drives up your blood pressure. If you push really hard, you can pass out from the intensity. In the worst case, you might have a stroke or heart attack, although I’ve never heard of that happening.”
He thought about that for a moment and then asked, “Has it ever happened to you? I mean passing out while getting fucked?”
“Only briefly once. In July.” With a chuckle, I continued, “I must have scared Robert half to death. He had me bent over the kitchen table and was fucking me pretty hard and fast. As he was cumming, all of the sudden I got light headed because of the intensity and I put my head down on the table. Robert noticed because, at least according to him, the insides of my ass got soft and I wasn’t pushing back like I normally do. He says that I didn’t respond to him. Actually, I heard him but couldn’t respond. I felt sort of like I was paralyzed, not in a bad way, but in a dreamy sort of way. I’m glad it didn’t last too long, because Robert was headed for the phone to call 911 when I stopped him. The whole situation felt good, but I got a pounding headache soon after that. In short, it’s probably okay for a guy your age, but I’d want to make sure you didn’t go too far.”
After a few more moments, Chad said, “I really need to go sit.”
“Okay, go. But what movies do you want to watch?” I asked.
On the way out the closet door to the bathroom, he said, “At least those two and choose anything else you want to watch.”
I looked around for the DVD, “The Apprentice,” not the TV show about the rich guy who likes to fire people, but a movie about an older guy who teaches a young guy about being a gigolo. Not that I wanted Chad to become one, though he would have excelled at that with his looks and body, but because of the relationship between the older and younger guy that develops through the movie. Once I had convinced myself that it was a good movie for him to see, I picked up Chad’s two selections and added mine to the bottom of the stack. For some reason, I was especially interested to see what he had chosen, primarily because he didn’t talk much and I really didn’t know what made him tick. The top movie was “Raging River”, which had some hot scenes, especially one where two guys fuck on a houseboat on the river. This movie also had a guy that looked pretty close to Chad. I applauded his good taste in gay movies.
The second movie I hadn’t seen Chad choose and I was curious to see what it was. As I shifted it on top of the stack, instantly tears began to form in my eyes. “Damn it,” I said quietly. It was my copy of “Brokeback Mountain” which I’d never been able to get through completely without it emotionally ripping my heart to shreds, followed by a depressing funk that lasted for a few days to a couple of weeks. I stood there trying to push down the emotions and tried to think of ways to keep Chad from watching the movie. I must have taken longer than I thought because I soon noticed that he was standing right beside me, looking at the expression on my face.
“What’s wrong?” Chad asked.
I sniffed and tried to calm the emotions. “One of your choices . . . caught me off-guard,” I said hoarsely.
After a pause, he asked, “The gay cowboy movie?”
“Yeah. Have you seen it before?” I asked.
“Of course not. No straight guy in his right mind would admit to watching it, and I never had any opportunity. But since you have a copy, I thought we’d watch it.”
I paused for a moment or two, turned my head, looked him straight in the eye and said, “All I can say is that it’s an intensely emotional movie, well, at least for me it is, and you’ll have to watch the last ten to fifteen minutes of it by yourself. Also, I’d prefer that you wait until another time to watch it, but if I can’t convince you of that, it’ll have to be the last thing you do before you leave to go home tomorrow evening.”
Seeing the wetness in my eyes, Chad reached out and stroked my back while I talked. After hearing what I had said, his eyes softened and he said, “That explains why it was in the corner of the shelf, turned around, so I couldn’t see the title.” After a few moments, he reached one arm around my front and the other around my back, and he pulled me into him. As we settled into position, I realized that Chad had pushed his head forward so that his forehead was against side of my head with his nose nestled in my hair just behind my ear. I could feel the heat of his breath against my neck. In that position, he quietly repeated what I had said to him earlier: “Remember, together we can get through anything.” After a short time, he began to nuzzle my neck and ear with his nose. Besides the fucking and the comforting hugs, it was the first real intimacy that Chad had shown to me. In response, I closed my eyes and let out a light moan. Noticing my reactions, Chad countered by lifting up his head and lightly biting several places along the back of my ear.
I really wanted to continue with that moment because it probably would have led to our first kiss. But after a few moments, this truly sincere gesture on Chad’s part was unfortunately destroyed by my own thoughts. The image popped into my head, and it was the image of someone looking at what we were doing and where we were standing. Although it was a bad pun, the situation started to make me chuckle. Chad pulled away and looked at me in surprise, so I had to tell him. “I’m really sorry to have destroyed this moment, and, trust me, I REALLY wanted it to continue. But I got a mental image of what we’re doing and all I could think of was how silly it might look to someone else.” After a short pause, I continued, “Here we are, two naked guys, standing in a closet, after having gay sex, discussing the emotions generated by a movie about two closeted gay guys. Can we be any more ‘in the closet’ than we are right now?” After a few seconds, Chad got the image and both of us roared in laughter.
We continued to laugh for a while, until our eyes locked together again. I reached up and put a hand on the side of his face, my fingers reaching up into the hair behind his ear and the thumb on the side of his face touching a sideburn. As I felt his face, I wanted to kiss him so badly, but couldn’t. Soon he reached up, gently took my hand and quietly said, “Let’s go watch the movies and see what comes up between us.” After that, I mentally started kicking myself for destroying what would have been what I really wanted. Chad must have sensed what I was doing, because he smiled at me, gently squeezed my hand, and added “We’ll get there soon enough.” So I handed him the DVDs, and on the way out of the closet, I grabbed some blankets for us to lay on and cover up with. I also grabbed a couple of pillows and a couple of towels, and we both headed to the living room.
I was about ten feet behind Chad as we walked through the hallway from the bedroom to the living room. Although the hall was dark, the living room was light because of the light coming in from the outside. As a result, I got an immensely enjoyable view of the V-shaped outline of Chad’s body as we walked along. All I could think of was “the perfect face does have the perfect body,” not overly muscled, not fat, just right. As we reached the living room, the smile on my face betrayed my thoughts.
“Whaaaat?” Chad asked.
“Uh, nothing,” I said trying unsuccessfully to suppress the grin on my face.
“Okay, what gives?” Chad asked again.
I finally said with a chuckle, “The outline of your body as you walked down the hall was a truly impressive sight to see.”
“Will you quit that? It makes me uncomfortable,” Chad countered.
“When the shoe fits. . . .” I said with a grin, and at the same time I reached up and stroked his hairy chest. “I’m sorry for doing this to you, but you’re just really, REALLY good looking to me.”
Chad blushed, but said, “Please, PLEASE, don’t do that to me anymore. It makes me self-conscious.”
I dropped the pillows and blankets in front of the TV, and then turned to Chad, looked him straight in the eye, and said seriously, “I need you to hear this clearly. I truly believe that you are one of the best looking guys on the planet. I’m sorry to make you feel self-conscious, but I like looking at you, especially this area,” as I rubbed my hand over his chest, then following the hairy trail from his chest to his crotch. “Even when you have shorts on, this always seems to turn me on.”
After a short pause, I continued, “But the real reason I look at you so much is because I wonder why you’re here, why you’d ever want to be with someone like me. I just want to look and memorize what I see before I wake up and find that it was all just a really good wet dream.”
The look of surprise on his face caught me a little off-guard. What he said after that caught me even more off-guard. “So you don’t think of yourself as good-looking?”
It took me a couple of seconds to respond, but I finally said, “I’m . . . okay looking. Certainly not as good looking as you, but okay.”
After a short pause, Chad said, “I think you’re good looking. Everyone your age should look so good.” After that comment, Chad immediately got this “oh shit” look on his face and said, “Geez, sorry. I didn’t mean to bring up the age thing. Damn.”
I laughed out loud at the comments. A few seconds later I said, “That’s alright. It had to happen sometime. And it certainly won’t be the last. But now that we’ve established our mutual admiration for each other, let’s put in a video and see what happens.” I got the blankets and spread them out while Chad put the first video into the DVD player, all the while thinking that what he had said was just being nice to me.
After he had turned on the DVD player and inserted the disk, he turned to me with this blank look on his face and with a sigh said, “Seems I need a Ph. D. to run your stereo and TV system, too.”
I laughed again, pushed a few buttons on the remote control and the movie intro came up on the TV. After that, I reached up, wrapped an arm around Chad’s waist, and pulled him down next to me on the blankets. He was between me and the TV, me spooning his back, and waiting for the movie to get started. While waiting, I leaned into him, put my mouth to his ear and quietly whispered, “I want you to fuck me during the first scene in this movie. There’s a guy that looks a lot like you and I want to feel your cock in my ass at the same time he has his cock in another guy’s ass.” With that comment, my cock got hard. I reached down to stroke his cock and found it hard as well.
At the start of this movie, seven guys piled into a minivan and drove off, then three more showed up and realized that they missed their ride. I always chuckled at this because I never could figure out where ten guys would fit into a minivan, well, unless some were sitting of top of others. Given that this was a gay movie, I guess that could have been possible.
The three guys that missed their ride sat on the front porch of this really huge house, got out some beers, and started drinking. The guys on the left and right were good looking, but the one in the middle was really good looking. He also happened to look like Chad but without chest hair. Soon, the Chad look-alike started rubbing his crotch. The other two followed quickly and soon all three were naked and stroking themselves. The one on the right (number 3) was nicely hairy, especially in the crotch and ass. Soon number 3 moved over to suck the cock of the guy on the left (number 1), and, after a while, the Chad look-alike got up and started fucking number 3.
Chad took his cue from the movie, moved me into a “doggie position” and began to play with my asshole. After a short time, he grabbed my hips, then I felt him slide his rock hard cock into me exactly at the same time as the Chad look-alike on the TV screen pushed into his buddy. It hurt at first and he didn’t give me much time to adjust, but I will say that Chad’s fucking almost exactly mirrored what I was seeing on the TV. After I got used to Chad being in me, the whole situation became incredibly intense. Talk about a movie coming to life–if there had been any chance that I could have cum without touching myself, this would have been the time. Shortly after Chad entered me, my cock started to leak heavily because Chad’s cock rubbed my prostate on every stroke.
Chad fucked me seemingly forever. Soon number 1 and number 3 in the movie started to cum which caused Chad to shift his pistoning of my ass into high gear. Chad’s breathing got ragged and uneven and I knew he wouldn’t be too much longer. When the Chad look-alike pulled out of his buddy and started shooting his load, I felt Chad gasp for breath and I felt his cock pulse in my ass, spewing load after load after load of hot cum deep into me, all of it splashing and mixing around inside.
Chad had moaned loudly all through his orgasm, leading me to believe that it had been pretty intense for him. When he almost collapsed on my back, I recognized how much. I had to hold onto him as I slowly lowered us to the floor, then he slid off me to the side, his eyes still closed. I paused the movie and watched him for a while. When he finally opened his eyes, he said, “I didn’t know that looking at three guys getting off on each other would be such a turn-on for me.”
I chuckled and said, “We get off pretty well with each other without any other visual stimulation. So the movie just pushed you a little higher and harder than before. If you’d been in me much longer, I probably would have cum without having to touch myself.”
“Why didn’t you stroke yourself and cum with me?” he asked.
After a pause, I said, “Because I wanted to save up for what comes next. Besides getting fucked by you feels really good all on its own.”
Chad looked over at me and got a sly grin on his face. “Why do I have the feeling I’m going to get seriously fucked by you soon?” he asked.
I laughed out loud but didn’t say anything. As I looked more closely at Chad, the sly grin left his face. Unfortunately for me, the look changed to one where his eyes asked me not to fuck him. So I reached out and ran my hand over his chest and stomach a couple of times to try to comfort him. When the look didn’t go away and he didn’t say anything else, I turned back to the TV and restarted the movie. I changed my plans to stroke myself instead of fucking him on the next part. I was a little upset, but he was new to this, so I’m sure getting fucked was becoming painful for him by now. Hell, if I had really paid attention to what my own ass felt like, I’d know what he was feeling.
The movie soon got to the scene I wanted. A guy ran down to a dock to fish and soon met up with another guy who was doing some fishing from his houseboat nearby. Of course they got together, but these guys were a little more intimate than the others. The scene started with each massaging the other’s back, which led to some hot kissing, which finally led to the fucking the really good looking top did to the good looking bottom. What really turned me on was it was outside and on a boat, all pretty much out in the open. The top guy did the bottom guy in a couple of positions: first, standing up so his cock had to be bent down to fuck the bottom guy’s ass, and second, both in a laying-down position, the really good looking guy fucking the other from behind. The scene had always been a turn-on for me, mostly because of the positions, and this time was no different.
Between the first and second positions of the guys in the movie, I noticed Chad was laying on his side next to me, looking at what I was doing and what going on in the movie. Soon he reached out, replaced my hand with his and continued to stroke my cock for me. Now that he was part of the action, my cock got even harder. I closed my eyes because I knew the scene pretty well, and in my imagination, I replaced the two guys in the movie with Chad and me. The very idea of Chad and me getting it on out in the open on a houseboat was an incredible turn-on for me.
I would have had my orgasm way before the guys in the movie if Chad had kept up what he was doing, but he stopped. I opened my eyes and found him looking at me. With a look of hesitance on his face, he said, “I need you to fuck me.”
I reached up and stroked the side of his face and asked, “Are you sure?”
“Yeah,” he said. Then he lay down on his back and lifted his legs.
I moved into position over him, my cock hard with anticipation. I really wanted to fuck him again, but I didn’t want to hurt him either. He must have sensed that because he reached down and guided my cock to his ass. As I pushed in, Chad arched his back and let out a loud groan. I’m sure most of it was pain, but as I moved slowly back and forth in him, he opened his eyes and he gave me a sly grin. Then he reached up, stroked the hair on my chest, and tightened and loosened his ass muscle around my cock several times. That was the go-ahead I needed to fuck him in whatever way I needed to fuck him.
Something happened while I was on top of him that time. We both kept our eyes open and locked onto each other. The movie and everything else became background noise as I repeatedly thrust into his ass. Chad’s cock got hard because I could feel his ass muscle get tighter and tighter around my cock. The intensity was way beyond what I expected to feel, and I thought that maybe he was falling in love with me. Whatever it was, he was getting me excited more and more by the moment.
To return the favor of what he was doing to me, while I fucked him, I reached down with one hand and began to stroke his cock with my palm, my fingers running over his hairy balls. We both kept our eyes locked on each other and we both moaned and groaned openly, the intense expressions on our faces saying far more than words. Soon the intensity was too much and I had to close my eyes and let out a big groan. The cum was boiling up in the base of my cock and it wouldn’t be much longer before I tripped. Chad stroked my chest and stomach with both of his hands. I stroked his cock faster and faster, then I heard a loud groan from him. That was all I needed to begin to shoot wildly into his ass, load after load after load, deep into him. I don’t know how I did it, but I kept stroking his cock with my hand. Soon I felt his ass tighten around my cock followed by another loud moan. He shot load after load after load of hot cum all over his stomach. Knowing he was having his orgasm pushed me into what felt like a second orgasm. The intensity shot back up, and my cock pulsed again and again and again. I didn’t shoot anything, but it giving me an incredible second peak just after Chad’s first. Also, I wasn’t sure how loud it was, but I hoped that my groan that second time didn’t bother the neighbors in the building.
As we both unwound from the experience, I quickly found that I had to support myself with both arms so that I wouldn’t fall directly onto Chad. He helped me out some by putting his hands on my sides and guiding me in a controlled fall next to him. As I shifted onto my back, I felt Chad move next to me. He lightly massaged my chest and stomach as I came back to reality. When I opened my eyes, he had a gentle, caring look on his face. I almost got tearful as we looked at each other because I so wanted to be with him forever. However, we were interrupted by the noise on the TV: the movie was already near the end of the next scene and we watched as two overly built guys shot their loads on each other. I could have cursed the movie for interrupting us, but it wouldn’t have made any difference because the moment Chad and I had shared was already gone.
The last scene was about two guys around a campfire. The scene had always been interesting to me, but it obviously wasn’t my favorite. However, I noticed that Chad’s cock was hard almost from the very beginning. As we watched the multiple positions the guys moved into, Chad looked down at me every so often. I tried to catch his eyes but he was always too fast and too interested in the movie. When the two guys on the TV finally got into a missionary position, kissing, with one fucking the other slowly, Chad and I happened to catch each other’s eyes. I reached up, stroked the side of his head, and said, “Fuck me.”
Chad need no further encouragement and was been my legs as quickly as I could pull them up. We were already about two-thirds of the way through the scene, and I knew he was going to have to move quickly to end with the guys on the TV. Little did I know how wound up Chad already was. He entered me slowly and waited for me to adjust, then he started pounding my ass as he watched the TV. Every so often he would close his eyes and moan from the tightness of my ass, but in general he watched the TV as he fucked me. The top guy on the TV soon started pounding away in his bottom buddy and I knew it wouldn’t be long for them.
Chad shifted into high gear and he fucked me hard and fast. I had gotten used to his large cock in me by now and his cockhead found the sweet spot in my prostate on just about every stroke. I began to moan and groan loudly, my ass switching back and forth from trying to push him out to squeezing him tightly. That helped some because Chad moaned and groaned loudly. Soon the guys in the movie started to cum, and that drove Chad over the edge. He threw his head back, moaned loudly, and thrust deeply within me, shooting his wads again and again and again deep in my ass. I groaned loudly from the feeling, continuing to either squeeze or push on him as he came.
As he got soft, Chad finally pulled out of me and flopped down on his side next to me, with an arm over my chest and his face next to the side of my head. After a while, I said with a chuckle, “You must get really turned on by fireside fucks. You kind of went wild that time.”
Chad’s arm tightened around me to let me know that he had heard me, but he didn’t say anything. Finally he said, “I really love the outdoors, camping, hiking, backpacking, that whole thing. The movie just sort of triggered me.”
I quietly responded, “We’ll have to go camping some time. I love all that stuff, too.”
He pulled himself up, about six inches away from my face, leaning on one arm next to me. He said, “I’d really like that.”
Because he was so close, I slowly reached up with hand and stroked the side of his face. Not really thinking I said, “I really like what you do to me. I think I’m obsessed with you. Actually, I know I’m obsessed with you.” Chad turned a bright red as he blushed at my comment. Seeing his reaction, I said, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. The comment just sort of popped out without me thinking.”
Chad held my gaze a little longer and said, “I think I know what you’re feeling.” He held my look for another few seconds as if to put an exclamation point on the end of what he’d just said.
With that look, all I could think of was how much I had come to love him. I so wanted to say more, for him to know how much I loved him, but I didn’t want to appear needy either. I hoped he got the message when I said, “I really want you to make love to me again, but I don’t think my ass can take any more today. I think I’m all fucked out for right now.”
Chad got a big grin on his face and started laughing. He rolled onto his back and continued to laugh.
“Whaaaat?” I asked, a little annoyed. I didn’t think what I had said was all that funny.
Chad laughingly said, “And I thought I was the only one with the sore asshole.”
I must have been dense not to get it right away, but I finally did and started to laugh, too. “Well, your arm-sized cock fucking my ass tends to make me sore.”
Chad laughed even more at that comment. “And you’re the experienced one. Just think what your elephant cock is doing to me.”
We both laughed a little more. After about thirty seconds, I rolled from my back to my side facing Chad and put a hand on his chest. “Am I hurting you?” I asked.
Chad responded, “It’s a little painful when you first put your cock in me, but after a while there’s no pain, just sheer pleasure. However, we’ve done it enough today that the pain is a little much.”
Rubbing my hand around on his chest, I said, “Whenever you’re at the point where this is painful, let me know. Even though I really like to fuck you, and having you fuck me, let’s not overdo it. I can jack off if I really need to, and I can jack you off, too.”
The look Chad gave me after saying that nearly made me melt. It was one of those deep, penetrating gazes that made me weak. It made me needy. I’d do just about anything for him at this point. Unfortunately that was when I slowly leaned closer to him and tried to kiss him. When I was about three inches away from his face, his hand came up to caress the side of my face and stop me from coming closer. Chad said quietly, “I know what you want, but I’m not prepared to do that yet. Every minute with you I get closer, but not yet. We’ll get there soon enough.” The disappointment must have shown in my eyes because he said it again, “Sorry, bud, but we WILL get there.”
As I slowly pulled back, a lump formed in my throat. Although the lack of kissing frustrated me, I had to keep reminding myself that Chad needed the space and time to figure everything out. I was ready, but he wasn’t, at least not yet. But he must have known that he’d upset me because he held my gaze and his hand massaged the side of my face for a long time. About a minute later, I finally snapped out of it. That’s when I said, “Let’s go take a shower. We both need it,” and grinned to the best of my ability. I wasn’t in great shape, but I could handle it now.
On the way back to the master bedroom and the shower, I didn’t notice that Chad lagged behind some. As I got to the bedroom, I turned to talk to him, only to see that he was about ten feet behind me. As he entered the room, I could see the shit-eating grin on his face, a grin that said “gotcha” all over it. Chad said, “Nice, REALLY nice outline and ass, too.”
I immediately knew that he had gotten me back for my comments about his body earlier. I blushed and all I could say was, “Fuck you.” Then we both laughed out loud as we walked into the bathroom and got into the shower.
I turned on the shower and got the water warm. Then I reached for the soap and found it wasn’t there. I looked at Chad and he had this devilish grin on his face. He said, “My turn to wash you. Turn around with your back to the water, spread your legs, and hold your arms straight out.” I complied wondering what was really going to happen. Chad stood before me and began to wash my chest and stomach, lathering up my hair pretty well. I squirmed as he washed my sides and enjoyed the feeling as he washed each armpit and arm fully. He even made sure to wash my hands and fingers really well. He then squatted in front of me and washed down the front and back of each leg, and washed each foot including between the toes. Finally he got to my crotch. Ever so gently, he washed my cock, playing with it a little as it lengthened some, and fully lathering my balls and all the hair around that area. He turned me around to rinse off, and at the same time, washed my back and all the way down to my butt. Then he turned me back around so my back could get rinsed.
I thought he was done, but he surprised me by saying, “Bend down and grab your ankles.” I looked at him questioningly and he laughed. “No, we’re not doing prison shower fuck, I just want to try something. It may or may not work. We’ll just have to see.” With some hesitation, I did what he asked, all the while wondering what he was going to do.
He positioned me so that my butt was just outside the main stream of the shower. Although I couldn’t see what he was doing, I could feel him thoroughly soaping my butt cheeks, ass crack and the outside of my hole. He then said, “I’m not trying to hurt you, but bear with me.” Soon I felt two fingers slide past my ass muscle and into me. It was slightly painful, but they slid in fairly easy, mostly because he had soaped them pretty well. However, it was pretty painful when he inserted a third finger, pulled me open some, and pulled all of me backwards into the stream of water. Then I felt what he was doing. The warm shower water was pouring into my ass and it began to fill me up. Soon I could hold no more and he slowly slid his fingers out. He said, “Now squat over the drain and push out all the water.” As I did so, my insides felt better, probably because they were cleaner. As I stood up, his eyes were searching my face to see if I had enjoyed it or not.
“My insides are definitely cleaner and I think I feel better because of it,” I said.
A look of relief came across his face. “Do you think a second time is needed?” he asked.
I looked at him and chuckled. “You just like playing with my butt, don’t you?”
“Well, yeah, but I’m wondering if it’s something you need to do to me, too,” he said with a sly grin.
“Yeah, let’s do it a second time,” I said, feeling a little excited from the idea.
I got into position again, and he did what he had done before. This time the warm water felt kind of erotic and I got a fairly good hardon because of it. After I emptied myself and stood up, Chad noticed the hardon and chuckled. I blushed and said, “Sorry, but anytime you probe my ass, my cock is going to stand up and call attention to itself.”
Chad laughed out loud at the comment. At the same time, he handed me the soap and got into position with the water running down his back.
I did pretty much the same thing to him, washing his chest and stomach, his sides, and both arms. I squatted in front of him and washed those nicely hairy and well muscled legs, probably spending more time than I should have. I made sure his feet were well washed, and then turned my attention to his crotch. I got my hands really soapy and started washing the hair around the base of his cock and all over his balls, massaging his balls gently as I washed them. I had him spread his legs some more and I washed the area from his balls to his butt to make sure I got everything. Finally, I soaped up my hands and began to clean his cock well by stroking it. I didn’t take long for him to start moaning and get a pretty good hardon. I thought I might get him off again, but soon he pushed my hand away and turned to rinse off. I stood up and washed his back and down to his butt. He turned again and rinsed off his back. Before he bent over to let me wash his ass, his eyes met mine and he quietly said, “Please be gentle back there. I’m pretty sensitive now.”
He bent over and I positioned him near but not quite in the water. I soaped my hands really well and began to wash those fantastic globes of his. After cleaning them well, I cleaned down into the butt crack and all over the top of his hole. I pushed him into the water to rinse and got my hands all soapy again. I moved him slightly out of the water and probed around his ass muscle. He was tight and I wasn’t going to be able to get both fingers in easily, so I told him to relax and push out as if he were taking a dump. He did and I was able to push both fingers into him. He moaned, but began to breathe heavily, so I twisted my two fingers level, spread them slightly and pushed a third into him quickly. I moved him back into the water and pulled the one finger up while pushing the other two fingers down. The two fingers acted like a funnel and water began to disappear into his ass. I could tell the water was having an affect on him since he began to moan lightly. Soon the water stopped flowing into him, and I slowly and gently removed my fingers. He squatted down over the drain and pushed the water out of his ass.
As he stood up, I noticed that he still had his hardon. When he saw my grin, he said, “Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know. Your ass probing makes me hard, too.” Then shortly after that he added, “You’ve turned me into such a pervert.”
I couldn’t help but laugh at his comments, and I added my own comment with a chuckle. “But you do it so willingly.”
Remembering our “fight” earlier that morning, Chad responded, “Asshole.”
I laughed again, and said, “Your second time awaits.” At the same time I held up the two fingers that had been in his butt and made a scissoring motion with them. It had its intended effect on him, because at first he winced then looked at me in disgust. But he got into position and I cleaned him out again. This time I made the water hotter, and got way more moans than I ever expected. Apparently it felt really good inside him since he held it for a short time before pushing it out with quite a bit of force.
After doing the butt cleanouts, we washed our hands really well, shampooed our hair, and did a final rinse on everything. I thought we were done and was about to turn off the water when Chad said, “We’re not done yet.” I looked at him puzzlingly and he grinned. He pushed me back into the water so that it was running down my back. He said, “Close your eyes,” which I did. I heard him soap his hands, and then I felt it: he started washing my forehead, down and under my nose, across my chin, around my neck, and then back up both sides of my face. He stopped and held my face in both hands. I felt really self-conscious and could feel my face blush. But I also felt warm inside, and the gesture made me feel that he really liked me for who I was. In response, I blindly reached out with both hands, found each hip, and slowly pulled him toward me. We stayed in that position for a while, his hands on the side of my face and our semi-hard cocks snuggling with each other between our legs. Finally he chuckled, slapped me lightly on one side of my face, washed my ears and turned me into the water to rinse off.
As I turned back to him after rinsing off, he was looking at me with one of those deep, penetrating looks. It caught me a little off-guard, but I said to him, “You don’t miss a thing, do you?”
Chad just kept looking at me and said, “And you don’t miss a thing either.”
“Not with the one I love,” I responded almost immediately, looking back into those eyes of his with a serious look that said I truly meant it. We stood, locked in that gaze for a short while. Since I knew he wasn’t ready yet to say that he loved me, I interrupted the silence by quietly saying, “It’s your turn now.”
It took him a few seconds to focus again, and I hoped that I hadn’t screwed up everything by saying that I loved him. Chad finally moved into position and closed his eyes. Before I had a chance to start washing his face, he reached out, grabbed my hips, and pulled us closer together. I washed his face as he had washed mine, stopping to hold his face in both hands and take a good long look at it. All I could think of was how much I really loved being next to this guy. It shocked me how much, and I hoped that it wouldn’t consume me or make me needy, but I was afraid that it already had.
After a while I pushed him back slowly so that the water cascaded down over the top of his head, across his face, where I could rinse off the soap while still holding him. After he was fully rinsed, I reached around him and turned off the water. We stood looking at each other for a short time, then I broke the silence by saying, “We need to get dried off.” As we parted, he chuckled.
We both got towels and dried ourselves off. Nothing was said during the whole time we dried our hair. Just before getting dressed, I asked “Since we’re experimenting today, can I try something else?”
“What did you have in mind?” Chad asked.
“I have some lotion that has mostly aloe in it. No oils or anything like that. I’d like to try it on our butts to see if it helps us, uh, recover from the, uh, activity,” I said. “I got it back in July just before Robert and I had our last weekend together. It seemed to help me recover faster after the weekend was over.”
With some hesitation, Chad responded, “Okaaaaay.”
I got the tube out of the drawer and had him bend over the counter with one leg up on the counter so I had clear access to his ass. I squirted some of the lotion out of the tube and massaged it into the outside of his ass muscle. Then I squirted out a larger amount and slowly pushed it into him, massaging it all around the insides of his ass. He seemed to like the coolness of the lotion against his hot, raw ass muscle, and he moaned slightly as I massaged the lotion into him.
When he stood up, he grimaced at the feeling. I looked at him questioningly and he said, “It just feels like my butt is leaking.”
“It takes some time to soak in, but the feeling will go away soon.”
After a few more seconds, he looked like he could live with it. He looked at me and, with a devilish grin on his face, said, “Your turn.” The grin didn’t make me feel comfortable, but I “assumed the position” anyway.
He put way too much on the outside of my ass and even more on the inside. He massaged me deeply and all over, rubbing the cool lotion all over the raw parts of my ass. He seemed to be taking longer than I expected, but the feeling was so good that I moaned and groaned quite a bit while he rubbed the lotion in. It took me a while, but I finally realized that he was giving me a really good prostate massage. Although I wanted him to continue, I had to reach around and stop him. Knowing that he’d been caught, he got a guilty look on his face. I looked at him and said, “Save that for tonight when we get into bed.” He got what I meant because a sly grin appeared on his face.
After washing our hands thoroughly and getting dressed, we had dinner. Well, it wasn’t much of a dinner: another yogurt, a couple of sports drinks, and banana each, but it was enough.
Neither of us spoke during dinner. Each of us seem preoccupied with our own thoughts. Mine were primarily about how well we fit together and what had happened that day, from the early morning “fight”, through all the sex throughout the day, to what had been done by both of us in and just after the shower. I wondered what Chad’s thoughts were about.
I broke the silence by saying, “I need to ask you some questions.”
He looked at me and said, “Sure, go ahead,” not realizing that I was about to hit him with some serious ones.
I launched into the first one with some hesitation. “Earlier today, when you were physically fucking me on the weight bench, who were you fucking in your imagination?” I asked.
Quietly he said, “Geez, I hoped that you’d forgotten about that. That was not one of my better moments.”
After waiting for a minute or two, I asked, “Was it your ex?”
He sighed, waited for about another thirty seconds, and quietly responded, “Yeah.”
I waited for a bit, then asked, “Were you raping her, possibly for what she did to you in the divorce?”
Chad immediately turned bright red, reached up and partially covered his face with his hands. He looked embarrassed, kind of like he’d gotten caught doing something he shouldn’t have done.
When he didn’t answer right away, I broke the silence by quietly saying, “I know a fair amount about what you’ve done at work over the past two to three years, I know what your college degrees are, and I’ve heard you talk about things on the golf course and going to and from the gym. I’m not here to judge what you did, I’m just trying to find out more about what makes you tick, so to speak. You’re really tight-lipped about you personally and what drives you. I really just want to get to know you better than I already do. None of this is intended to be mean.”
After another minute or two, he uncovered his face and started to stare at the table. He quietly responded again, “Yes.”
I went on to the next question. “In early October, on the Friday afternoon the week after I got back from travel, when you saw me in the parking lot, you got back in your car and drove away instead of coming to see me. Why?”
Chad immediately said, “Geez, no wonder some of the people at work are afraid of you.”
I gave him a questioning look and said, “Huh?”
“You ask the most penetrating questions, and you seem to already know all the answers,” he responded.
I was still perplexed so I said, “I must be dense, what are you talking about?”
“At work all the time, and in software reviews in particular, a large number of the guys and girls are afraid to show you what they’ve done. You always seem to find something badly wrong with what they’ve done, and it embarrasses them,” he said.
With a sort of exasperated tone of voice, I said, “Well, if they’d just come to me for some advice before they got too far into it, they’d get the right way to write something sooner rather than later. Then they wouldn’t be embarrassed. It’s all a learning process. I’m always full of opinions and ideas, people just have to ask for them. And when they don’t, it’s my job to make sure the product works correctly and reliably, so they’re going to get embarrassed if something’s wrong.”
“They said that too,” he chuckled.
“Whaaat?” I asked, kind of ticked off at this point.
“That you were full of opinions,” he said with a big grin as he looked at me.
I finally got what he was doing, and the grin had given it away. He had found a couple of my hot buttons and pressed them really good and hard. He was spinning me up so he didn’t have to answer the question. I took me a minute or two, but I finally spun back down. As I spun down, I sighed, then chuckled, and finally said, “Nice try, but you still haven’t answered my question.”
“You’re not going to make this easy are you?” As he looked at me, my face obviously said that I wasn’t, and he looked back down at the table.
After a few more moments of silence, he got serious and started what would be a long monologue, one of the longest that I had ever heard from him. “You’ve always been in my work life, but in June, at a low point in my personal life, you showed me that you cared, probably the most of anyone outside my family. In June and July we became great friends quickly, far more quickly than I’ve ever made friends before. We were fairly evenly matched on everything we did. I didn’t expect that you’d be able to keep up with me, but when you did, I thought that this could really be fun to have a good friend to work with and work out with.
“After you let me cry on your shoulder in September, something changed on my end of the relationship. I became attached to you, almost dependent on you, not in a physical way, but in an emotional way. Not many guys in my life have ever been this way to me. I missed you at work while you were on travel. I missed you in our group golf games. I missed you at the gym.
“In late September, Robert called on Thursday the week before and suggested that I not come to the gym on Friday. Then he dropped a bombshell on me: in effect he told me that you were gay. Initially I was really pissed. All I could think of was that you just wanted to get to know me better so that you could get into my pants. I’ve never wanted to be treated like a sex object, although I’ve dated some women in the past who would have liked to use me that way.
“Even after taking some time off to think through everything, when I saw you that Friday, I couldn’t handle the situation, so I drove away. That weekend, I got really drunk and tried to work it out, but I still couldn’t, that is, until I realized that I was . . . am still . . . emotionally attached to you.” At that point he looked up from the table into my eyes. He gave me one of those deep, penetrating gazes, then looked back down at the table and continued. “Over the last couple of weeks, I’ve been battling with how I feel about you and what to do next. When you left me alone, I knew there was something more to our friendship than I had realized. You gave me space and time to figure it all out. There was never any pressure, and I knew you were there if I ever needed to talk.
“Unfortunately I wasn’t doing well on my own, so I went to Robert and asked him what I should do. He explained what you and he had done and suggested that I do the same to see if there was more to the relationship than I realized. On some sort of autopilot, I did the doctor’s visit, the waiting for the results, and then talked with Robert again. After setting this up, I got really nervous. I called Robert a couple of times to cancel but he wouldn’t let me. He said that you were already expecting someone to show up. And then he basically gave me an ultimatum: he told me that if I didn’t go through with it that he would be starting a permanent relationship with you. Given his looks and easy-going nature, I knew I would lose you to him if I didn’t do something, and for some reason I couldn’t let that happen. So I went through with all of this.” With a small grin on his face, he said, “And now you know why I needed the beer last night.”
We laughed some, then Chad continued with a new seriousness. “I had kind of hoped that this weekend wouldn’t be as enjoyable as it has been. That would have made my decision about you so much easier. I could have stayed good friends with you for the rest of my life, but the sex has been so much more than I expected that . . . well, now I’m just confused about what I need to do next.” After a short pause he added, “There’s also something else you should know . . .” and then his voice trailed off and he started to get nervous.
After about a minute of waiting for him to continue, I asked quietly, “And what is that?”
“About two weeks ago, about the same time I first talked to Robert, I started getting calls from my ex-wife. She was fishing around to see how I’ve been doing. She got started talking about the early days of our marriage. I didn’t say much back to her, but it has stirred up the emotions and feelings I used to have for her before the divorce.” Chad looked up at me and said, “She’s called me about every other day since then.”
I’m not sure what I did next. I think I just sat there stunned. All the other questions I wanted to ask became unimportant. Eventually I’m sure my face showed how unhappy I was with what he had just told me, mostly because he hadn’t told me earlier, but partly because I hadn’t seen it coming. But I had asked for it, and his last statements had finally explained why he had been so combative earlier in the morning and hadn’t been able to kiss me in the afternoon. He was confused and searching for what to do next. Unfortunately he was looking for support from someone who was already way too involved with him to be able to give good answers. Since we both needed to hear it, I asked question that was in both of our minds, “Do you still love your ex?”
Before I asked the question, Chad had been intently looking at the table. When I asked the question, he closed his eyes and shuddered for moment. I must have hit the proverbial nail on the head because he got up out of the chair, walked over to the sliding glass door to the deck, put his hands on the frame, and leaned into it. Never once during that time did he look at me.
When he didn’t deny it immediately, I knew that he was. Immediately I was pissed with myself because I had done it again: I had fallen in love with a person who couldn’t be romantically involved with me. Sure the sex had always been great, but the commitment wasn’t there. It had happened all through college and after college until, only by the grace of God, I met my wife. Now it was happening again. Robert hadn’t grown up emotionally yet, and Chad was still in love with his ex. I seemed destined to live most of my life as a single guy, and that seemed to be the part that hurt the most. Throughout all of this, he stood and I sat, both of us separated by the impending answer.
After probably what was at least fifteen minutes, I realized that we needed to go ahead and get this out in the open and work it out. It wasn’t want I wanted, but his heart still belonged to someone else. So I got up from the table, walked to a spot behind him, and began to scratch his back. When I first started, I noticed how tense he was underneath the shirt as I scratched him, but the more I scratched, the more he relaxed. After a while, I reached up and began to massage his shoulders. They too were tense, but he relaxed as I massaged them.
Chad finally continued, “Now I stand here six months later wondering what to do. Seems that the unspoken therapy that you’ve been giving me since June has helped me almost forget about the pain of the divorce itself. But, unfortunately, that has made it easier for me to realize that I still love my ex-wife, even though we’re now divorced.”
The thought was finally a stated fact. To cover up how I felt, I started to talk while still scratching and massaging his back. I said, “Now I have a few things to say. First, we all have our dark sides, our want to hurt others physically through sex. Whatever anger you’ve admitted here is a secret that will be known only to you and me. If you ever feel this way again, come see me first. After today, I think I can handle just about anything you can do with your dick. That way, the anger stays in this relationship and doesn’t spill out to anyone else. The last thing I want to do is have to bail you out of jail and have to pay for a lawyer because you raped your ex-wife or anyone else because you’re angry about the divorce.
“Second, you have to deal with how you feel about your wife. Your divorce was difficult because you still love her but she doesn’t love you. I’m trying to stay impartial here, but it’s difficult and I have to say this. If you go back to her, please make sure you get a good lawyer and get a good pre-nup so she doesn’t rip you a new hole emotionally again. Also, please don’t go back to her just because you feel obligated or have a loyalty to her that she doesn’t have for you.
“Finally, and this is going to be difficult for me to say and for both of us handle.” And I paused trying to keep my voice under control. “I’ve always been proud when people say that I’m there if they need me. I’ll always be here to talk through anything you want to talk through. That’s what good friends are for. I also wait for a while longer while you make a decision. But I can’t wait forever, and I won’t always be available to talk. I’m really sorry I have to say this, but I won’t, I can’t, share you with anyone else.”
Pretty soon I realized that Chad was shaking under my fingers. Even though I was hurting from the situation and wasn’t sure I should, I couldn’t help myself. I put my hand on Chad’s shoulder and slowly turned him around. We fell into a desperate hug, my left arm over his right arm, my right arm under his left arm. We both got lost in the warmth and comfort of that hug, neither of us wanting to have to face the reality of what was before us: him still in love with his ex and me dealing with possibly losing him back to her. I had no idea how much time we spent in that hug, but after a while I happened to look at the clock and it was around 8pm. We had finished dinner and been talking since around 6pm.
I slowly broke the hug. Chad seemed to want it to continue and that should have been a good sign for me. Because of the emotions and how drained both of us must have been, I suggested that we watch a regular movie before going to bed that night, just to clear our minds. While I picked up the pillows, blankets, and towels from in front of the TV and took them back to the closet, Chad searched through the DVD collection I had in the study. We met back at the TV and began to watch the movie “Stealth,” a movie about a super-secret, multi-million dollar, computer-controlled airplane. I had always found it interesting because of the computer technology and the good-looking actress and actors, but I was also tired from the day. I found myself taking short naps throughout the movie. During some of the time I was awake, I found Chad dozing, too. Both of us needed to get to bed soon, mostly because of the physical activity of the day, but also because of the emotional discussions of earlier that evening.
At the end of the movie, groggy from the too short naps, we both got up, turned off everything, and headed to the bedroom to get ready for bed. It was only about 9:30pm, but anyone who would have seen us could tell we were both tired. We brushed our teeth, stripped down to t-shirts and underwear and crawled into bed. Before I turned off the light, I took one last look at Chad. I didn’t think he could get any better looking, but he had this sleepy, dreamy look on his face that sort of turned me on. I shouldn’t have, but his physical attraction overrode my emotional state, and I put a hand on his chest and moved it around. He sighed at the touch and then sat up to take off his t-shirt and underwear. I followed not too far behind. As we laid back down, Chad spread his legs and motioned for me to move in. I simply said, “At night, you’re on top.”
He grinned and said, “In the morning, you’re on top.” With a chuckle he added, “And the rest of the day, we negotiate.” We both laughed heartily at the comment. It probably wasn’t for him, but for me it was a defining point in our relationship.
Chad rolled into position in between my legs while I reached for a tube of lube. I lubed his cock and my ass, and while I was putting the tube back on the nightstand, he pushed into me in one swift move. I closed my eyes, arched my back, and moaned loudly as he entered me. The feeling was, as usual, initially painful but soon turned into incredible. In reality, he was probably too large for me, but it always felt like his cock fit my ass perfectly. Almost instantly, my prostate began to throb and I groaned and moaned while trying to push him back out. I was lost in the sensation, and it got even more intense as he started to thrust in and out of me. The feeling spread from my ass to the rest of my lower body, making my own cock hard in the process. I grabbed my cock and began to stroke it, making me tighter around Chad’s cock and causing him to groan louder. The intensity of the whole situation began to spiral upward, almost out of control for both of us. I finally opened my eyes and saw him looking at me. I said, “Fuck me, bud, fuck me hard.” With that urging, Chad started pounding his cock into me and I started to stroke myself faster and faster. Soon I heard ragged breathing on his part and I felt that usual boiling sensation in the base of my cock. We rocketed toward our own peaks. Soon, my cock began to pulse and shoot. I shot several loads, one long ropey string on my stomach and several more on my lower abs. At the same time, I felt Chad shoot several hot loads deep into my ass, all splashing and sloshing around inside me as he continued to piston in and out of me.
As we both calmed down and got soft, Chad wanted to flop down on the bed beside me, but this time I didn’t let him. I said, “I want to feel you close to me.” I cleaned off my chest and stomach with a towel and indicated that I wanted him to lay on top of me. With some hesitation, he did so, our legs and cocks mingling together, but our upper bodies not touching because he still supported most of his weight with his arms. I reached under his arms and began to scratch his back. Soon he shifted both of us in a way that we could hug while laying down: his right arm went underneath my left arm and under my back, while my right arm went underneath his left arm so I could hug his back. We hugged tightly in this position for a long time. He relaxed and settled in more as time went on, and eventually most of his weight was on me. He was heavy but I really wanted the weight on me to get that feeling of oneness that I might lose sometime in the near future. During all of this, his head was next to mine and he had it turned so that his nose and mouth were next to my neck. His hot breath on my neck felt comfortable, and I recorded the memory so that I could play it back anytime I might need to in the future. Nothing was said during this time, and nothing needed to be said. I think we both realized that we’d be this close for only just a short time longer.
During most of this time, I had been scratching Chad’s back. After a while I got a little mischievous and began to lightly tickle his side. On the first time, he squirmed and chuckled some. On the second time, he squirmed even more, said “Stop that” into my ear, but kept his head next to mine. I shouldn’t have, but I tickled him lightly a third time. Boy, did I get a surprise. Chad reared up as if I had hit him really hard and he pinned both of my hands down on the bed. Then he moved his legs so that his calves were on top of my thighs and most of his weight pressed down on them. He had me pinned in such a way that I couldn’t move anything except my head. Then I got a good look at his face. He looked pissed, really pissed. I squeaked out a “Sorry.” He held that position for a long time, but did nothing to me. He had just shown me that he could get me into a position where he could really, really hurt me if he wanted to. I got the message loud and clear (again), but I also couldn’t help but notice the raw power of his body. Although I was somewhat scared of him like this, I was excited by it, too. My cock got harder with time, so the more time he stayed in this position, the harder I got.
After a while, the pissed look dissolved into a devilish grin. He moved both of my hands over my head, put one of top of the other, and held both hands together with one of his hands. He then reached down with the other hand and began to alternately tickle both of my sides. I squirmed and laughed and pleaded for him to stop, but he didn’t. After a short while, I felt his hand on my hardon. He looked at me with a questioning look. Immediately I blushed, but still said, “You’re an attractive, powerful, impressive looking person from this view. I can’t help it and I’m not quite sure about this, but think I like being dominated by you. I initially felt it this afternoon when you were fucking me on the weight bench, but the feeling is much stronger tonight.”
What he did next surprised me. While continuing to pin my legs with his legs and my hands with one of his hands, he started to rub my cock and balls with the palm and fingers of his second hand. The feeling in my crotch along with the sight of his body above me in this dominating position had quite an effect on my visual senses and my imagination. I got very hard, very quickly, and even though I had cum just a short time ago, I felt another powerful one building quickly in me. As he rubbed me faster and faster, the feelings got stronger and more widespread in my groin. Soon I closed my eyes and began to moan loudly. I felt that boiling feeling deep within me and it built quickly. I pleaded with Chad to continue what he was doing, and he did, only faster and harder. Reaching the point of no return, I moaned loudly, arched my back and shot another large load on my stomach followed by several smaller loads, again and again and again. The feeling was incredibly intense, especially the way Chad was rubbing me and how hard he was pressing down. Afterwards, Chad continued to rub my cock, but slower and slower as I spun down from the experience.
It took me several minutes to recover and for my breathing to return to normal. During this time, Chad lay down beside me. I felt his hand roam over my chest and stomach, playing with the pools of cum resting there and my hair in general. He got a towel and cleaned me, wiping the sweat off my face and the sweat and cum from my chest, stomach, and crotch. Soon I opened my eyes and looked over at him. Our eyes met and he got this broad grin on his face. I couldn’t help but grin back. I reached over and stroked the side of his face and asked, “Do I need to do something like that for you?”
“Not tonight. Maybe some other time,” he replied.
With a chuckle, I put my hand down and said, “Good. I don’t think I could at this moment.” After a short pause, I added, “By the way, in that position, you could have fucked me again if had wanted to.”
Chad chuckled and said, “I’ll remember that for some time in the future.” About a second later, he yawned and that caused me to yawn, too.
I said, “Let’s get our clothes back on and go to sleep. We still have tomorrow.”
We got up, used the bathroom again, and put on our underwear and t-shirts. This time when I crawled into bed, I took one final look at Chad and realized that he was already asleep. I reached to turn off the light and noticed that the clock showed about 10:30pm. As my head hit the pillow, Chad was already snoring lightly. It must have taken me a minute or two longer, but soon I was in dreamland with him.
Sunday morning’s weather was rainy, chilly, and dreary, but it provided the cloud cover to help me stay asleep longer than usual. I had gotten up at my usual 6am to take a leak but was still so exhausted that I crawled back into bed and fell back asleep almost immediately. I thought I felt Chad do the same, but I wasn’t really sure of anything at that hour.
At about 8:30am, I finally woke up. Given that I had slept for about ten hours, I thought I’d be well rested and ready for more time with Chad. But I had a headache, my neck and back hurt, and I generally felt like I had been hit by a truck. Then I remembered all of yesterday evening’s conversation and realized that I probably had a good reason for hurting so much. This always seemed to happen when I got really stressed out. I thought I had handled the situation pretty well so I shouldn’t have been stressed out, but I must have been fooling myself.
As I looked over at Chad sleeping, all I could think of was how nice it would have been to wake up to this face, this body, this person, every morning. Unfortunately, this situation was turning out to be an NTB, an acronym that a group of us in college had coined to mean “not to be.” Rather than dwell on it, I got up quietly, put on the sweats, socks and extra shirt I had by the bed (it was cold in the condo now), and left the bedroom so Chad could continue to sleep.
After I did all the same things that I had done early Saturday morning, I got three ibuprofens from the cabinet and a sport drink from the fridge, and took them. I found that I was thirsty and finished the sport drink quickly. After putting the bottle in the recycling bin, I realized I was also hungry, so I ate a banana and a yogurt cup. Finally the medicine began to take effect and I relaxed some.
I opened the curtains for the sliding door and happened to wander over near the spot where Chad and I had talked the night before. I leaned a shoulder against the door jamb and looked out at the Bay, my nose about three inches from the glass in the door. As I looked out, I thought, “This is such a fugly day.” Physically I was feeling a little better, but emotionally I still felt like shit, and the clouds and rain over the bay just reinforced the feeling.
My mind wandered through several things and then I realized that I had been so busy with work that I’d never really taken a good look out this door during daytime since I had moved in almost a year earlier. Details like how the shoreline meandered and the seagulls fought over fish all looked new, and it made me think how much my wife would have enjoyed this view. She had been a water person and being at the ocean was such a pleasure to her. She got such great pleasure sitting out on a deck and just enjoying the breeze in her face and the sound of the waves crashing on the beach. Just watching her enjoy it always brought a great peacefulness to me. I got a lump in my throat and tears formed in my eyes when I realized that I’d probably have to replace this view with some other view in the near future.
I guess I had heard the movement but hadn’t paid any attention to it. Next thing I know, a fully-clothed Chad was leaning against the center of the door and looking straight at my eyes. I had to stifle any tears and cover up what I was feeling because I didn’t want him to know how much the conversation of last night had affected me. I guess I didn’t do too good of a job because he asked, “Is there anything you want to talk about?”
“Not really,” I said.
He moved around behind me and started to scratch my back. Soon he began to massage my shoulders, especially the muscles right around the neck. Chad said, “Must be something big you’re not telling me, because your muscles are rock hard.”
“I didn’t sleep well last night,” I responded.
After a few seconds Chad stopped massaging my neck, left his warm hands on the back of my neck and said, “When I have a rough night, something happened during the day, or the evening, that unknowingly upset me or pissed me off.”
I didn’t respond to his comment.
After waiting a minute or two Chad said, “Okay, since it looks like I’m going to have to drag it out of you, let me start by asking this: What do you think I should do about my ex?”
I leaned my head forward against the glass and with a chuckle said, “You have such a knack for asking difficult questions first thing in the morning, don’t you.”
Chad chuckled but said nothing.
Soon I got serious and responded, “I’m too close to this situation to make any comments.”
“I know you are, but so am I. Besides who else do I talk to this about? I certainly can’t talk to any of the guys on the golf course.”
I turned around, made fists with my hands, lightly pounded on Chad’s chest and said, “I can’t have this discussion Chad, I just can’t. I thought I could control my obsession with you, but I’ve found that I can’t. You’re gonna have to figure this one out on your own.”
He immediately reached up, grabbed and held my wrists tightly, and said, “But I need to hear what the most important person in my life says I should do. You’re always objective and see things more clearly than most people do,” as he looked straight into my eyes.
I felt tears form in my eyes as I said, “You need to get a good pre-nup and go back to your ex. Being married and having kids is the accepted way of life in this country. Being straight will be so easy for you, especially since everyone really likes being around you. Being gay is a pain that I don’t think either of us is prepared to handle.” I paused for a moment, “Then we both need to forget that this weekend ever happened.”
He paused for a moment as if he were drinking in what he’d heard, but I saw no change in the look of his face. Then he asked, “If I went back to my ex, what would you do?”
All I could think of was that he had asked for it. “I’d have to change jobs and move away from here. There are too many good memories and too many painful memories, and if you went back to your wife, the painful ones would outweigh the good ones.”
His eyes started to glisten with tears and he continued to tightly hold my wrists. “Damn it, I knew that’s what was happening. At work, you’re well known at work for thinking so far ahead of everyone else. I had a feeling that you were making plans too far in advance here, too.” After a short pause, he continued. “Please, PLEASE, stop planning out our relationship right now. Please let it just flow from moment to moment for a while. Also, please stop making me feel so incredibly guilty for not being able to give you an answer today. I need some more time to work out where I’m going. The world is not always as clear to me as it is to you. Although I still love my ex, you made me realize that maybe I am keeping a loyalty to her that isn’t deserved. But I need time to find that out. And it’s going to take time. However, until a final decision is made, I want you to know that you’ve become an incredibly close friend, someone who I can share my thoughts with, someone that truly supports me, even though it may cost him. And someone that’s also good, REALLY good in bed. Other than my wife, I mean ex-wife, I can’t think of anyone else I want to share my life with.” Then he paused for a moment before saying, “Besides all of that, this is a weekend that I’ll never be able to forget.”
I was stunned by what he had just said. I also felt guilty for putting so much pressure on him when he didn’t have all the info he needed to make a decision. Even I got pissed off when others did that to me.
My attention must have wandered for a moment because Chad shook my wrists and asked, “Did you hear what I said?”
My eyes snapped back to his, and a small smile must have appeared on my face because one appeared on his. Through the tears in my eyes, I responded, “Yes, I heard. And I love you too.” At which point we both chuckled some because we both realized what all the words really meant. “But I need you to at least loosen your grip on my wrists. My hands are falling asleep.”
“Oh, shit. Sorry man, I didn’t realize.” and he let go of my wrists altogether.
“No problem. We’re both sort of wrapped up in this,” I said.
As I rubbed my wrists, he nervously said one last thing. “But I have a temporary restriction.”
“What is that?” I asked hesitatingly.
“Uh, mmmm, we can’t kiss yet,” he said looking down at the floor and then back up to me, his eyes showing me that he was sorry that he had to do this.
The disappointment must have registered on my face even though I had tried to keep it from showing. I had to know why he was afraid to do this, so I asked “Why?”
“I’m not sure. I can’t seem to put it into words. But why do you need to kiss me?” he asked.
All of the sudden, the attention was on me. I had successfully tried to avoid this situation earlier, but he’d finally asked the question. I felt the heat in my face as I blushed. I turned away from his eyes and just sort of stood there embarrassed at the situation.
Chad obviously noticed what was happening because he put a hand on the side of my face and pulled my face back so our eyes met. “I wasn’t going to press you for answers earlier, but I have to press you for one now.”
It took me a while as my brain stumbled for the correct words to say, but I finally said, “I need to feel intimate with you, because that’s the only way I can get a hardon.” With that statement, Chad dropped his hand from the side of my face, got a big grin on his face, and I could tell that he was trying really hard not to laugh. It only made me further embarrassed that I had said it. “Gee thanks for stomping all over my emotions.”
He finally laughed out loud and got it out of his system. I turned to walk away, but he reached up with one arm, grabbed me, and wrapped the other arm around me, and said, “You could have fooled me Friday night.”
I paused and then admitted quietly, “Well, THAT was pure lust.”
“And yesterday afternoon?” he asked.
“Okay, mostly lust,” I said.
“And last night?” he asked. When I didn’t answer for a while, he finally realized what last night had been all about. “So last night you switched from a guy who’ll do anything to stick his dick in a hole and fuck it, to someone who can only be intimate with me?” he asked.
I had to chuckle at the first part of his question. Then after a short pause, I answered quietly, “Yeah.”
Then in a playful voice, Chad said, “Cool. So that means that if we’re not intimate for the rest of the weekend, then I can be on top all of the time.”
For some reason, the comment instantly pissed me off and I struggled and finally got out of Chad’s hug. I turned to him and said loudly, “Fuck you. There’s no fucking way you’re going to be on top the rest. . . .”
While I was ranting at him, Chad gently cupped my face with his hands and looked straight into my eyes. When I quit ranting, he quietly said, “How do you feel now?”
A two-by-four to the side of my head would have had about the same impact when I realized what he was doing. In his own devious way, Chad had pulled me out of my depressed funk in a matter of minutes. Tears formed in my eyes again, I got a smile on my face, and I finally said, “Thanks, I needed that.”
He gave me one of his megawatt grins, nodded his head in a gesture that said “you’re welcome”, and let go of my face. Then he got a serious look and asked, “Have you had breakfast yet?”
“Yes. Do you want me to get you something?” I asked.
“No, not right now. A little later,” he replied. Then he reached over and tugged on an elbow. “I’m not the one who’s going to be doing all the work.”
It took me a few seconds, but I finally got what he meant. Surprisingly my cock started to get hard from the anticipation as we made our way back to the bedroom.
I thought I was fast getting undressed, but Chad was already in the bed with the sheet pulled up over himself when I turned to get into bed. The sheet had settled in around his body and I could see the outline of his hardon under the sheet. I also noticed that his legs were spread, and he had gotten his tube of lube from the nightstand.
As I moved in next to Chad, I couldn’t help but grin and say, “Anticipating something?”
He chuckled and said, “Fuck you.”
“Later. It’s my turn now,” I said as I moved into position between his legs. I slowed the pace a little, and took a good look at the person below me: the good-looking face, the blue eyes and brown hair, the broad shoulders, and the hairy chest and stomach. As I got into position, he wrapped his legs around my waist. I felt him reach down and apply lube to his ass and then he wrapped his hand around my cock to lube it. He stroked me slowly and my cock responded by getting harder with each stroke. Soon he was pulling me closer and guiding my cock to his ass. I pushed forward and easily entered him. As I slid in slowly, he closed his eyes, arched his back and took deep breaths. It had been many hours since I’d been in him last, and I’m sure it was painful as I entered. But he didn’t complain. He just took it as I slowly slid completely into him.
After about thirty seconds of adjusting to me, he finally relaxed and opened his eyes. There were tears in them, so I asked, “Do I need to pull out?”
He grinned and said, “No. Just thinking about how well you seem to fit in me.”
Tears began to form in my eyes as I said, “I was thinking the same thing about you last night.”
We both chuckled. I so wanted to kiss him, but he’d set the rules. Then a thought popped into my mind. “Close your eyes and turn your head,” I said. With a quizzical look, Chad did what I had asked. I moved down to the lower part of his neck and began to lightly kiss from there up his neck to behind his ear. When I got to his ear, I nibbled it in several places. He lightly moaned during this and tightened his ass muscle around my cock. I quietly said in his ear, “If I can’t kiss you, can I do this to you?”
“Fuck, yeah,” was all he said.
Because of the closeness of our bodies, I felt him reach down and start to rub his cock. He had to do it “flat handed” because there were only a couple of inches of space between us. But I had other ideas. I reached down, grabbed his hand, and pulled it back up to the mattress where I pinned it. Then I did the same to his other hand. I pulled back and grinned at him.
“So this is what it feels like to be dominated,” he said with a sly grin.
“Not really dominated, just restrained,” I said. “Domination is way more than this, but I thought you might want to experience it first-hand so you can see if you like it or not.”
“From anyone else, I don’t think I’d like it, but from you it’s kind of exciting,” he said.
Chad tightened his ass muscle around me really tightly. I couldn’t help but close my eyes, throw back my head, and moan loudly. Finally he let go, and I opened my eyes again. When I looked down, he had this sly look on his face. So looking him in the eye, I started slowly pistoning in and out of his ass. That caused him to close his eyes and moan loudly. Then I stopped. When he opened his eyes, he said huskily, “Okay, okay, you win,” to which I chuckled and let go of his hands.
I couldn’t believe how much lust had taken over my body. I guess we were now just two guys enjoying each other without any attachments. I had wished for more, and maybe it would still appear, but for now, I could live with the situation, especially since it was my cock in his ass.
I slowly pushed away from him and gave us both some more room. The feeling of his tightness around my cock was exquisite. I started to piston in and out of him at a moderate speed, causing both of us to close our eyes and groan/moan loudly. That he enjoyed me being in him was a turn on that got me harder. My hardness rubbing against his insides caused him to further enjoy me being in him. Soon I found my self rocketing toward my peak. Chad must have been feeling the same thing because I felt him stroking his hardon faster and faster as I pistoned in and out of his ass faster and faster. Soon I felt that all-too-familiar boiling feeling deep within me, so I moved back and forth, faster and faster, in and out of his ass. I was lost in the feeling and I felt myself start to cum. But I clamped down hard with the muscles and held it back for a little longer. Almost immediately I heard Chad moan “Fuck FUCK FUUUUUCCCCKK” as he shot a huge load all over his chest and stomach. That triggered me to let go and I shot huge loads into his ass again and again and again, all while Chad continued to shoot loads all over his stomach.
Slowly we recovered. I had my forehead against one of his shoulders while I regained my breath. I noticed he was breathing heavily as well. Then he reached his arms around me and began to scratch my back. When my cock softened and slipped out of his ass, he pulled me up into position with my head next to his, my nose and mouth pointed to his neck. We adjusted arms and moved into the hugging position that we had discovered the night before. Slowly but surely I let my weight settle against him.
Chad stopped scratching my back and began to hug me. “So this is what it feels like,” he said.
Because our heads were close together, I nibbled his ear and whispered, “Yeah. So how does it feel to you?”
After a pause, he said, “Good. Really good.”
We stayed in that position for a while longer. I knew that I must be getting heavy, so when he tickled me, I said, “Okay, I’ll move to the side now.”
Chad laughed out loud out my statement and asked, “How did you know?”
I moved to my side next to him, leaned on one elbow and said, “Remember, I’ve been in your place before. Last night’s tickling was to get you to move, but you did something else instead.”
He laughed as he remembered. Then he looked at me with one of those penetrating gazes of his. It made me want him so much that it hurt. As I looked away, I said, “If I can’t kiss you, you can’t look at me that way.” When I looked up, he still had the same gaze, but now he had a slight grin with it. I looked at him and said, “Keep it up and you’ll pay for it.” When he kept the gaze, I reached over with both hands and began to tickle him.
Chad started to respond to my tickling, but he backed down quickly and said, “Sorry, but I’ve got to go sit.”
I watched Chad’s every move as he got out of bed and made his way to the bathroom. He was just as good looking in motion as he was sitting or laying down. But I realized that he hadn’t had breakfast yet. So I got out of bed, collected his clothes, took them into the bathroom, and dropped them at his feet saying, “Let’s get you some breakfast.” Then I went back out to the bedroom and got dressed. We finished getting dressed about the same time and headed to the kitchen.
He had a “heavy” light breakfast with two sport drinks, a banana, a cup of yogurt, and some string cheese. I also had some string cheese to partially refill what I had burned doing the things we had just done in bed. As we sat, Chad caught me off-guard when he asked, “If you ever moved away from here, where would you go?”
I looked over at him and gave him my best you-had-to-remind-me-didn’t-you look. He ignored the look and continued to look back at me with an I’m-expecting-an-answer look. After a while I mentally gave up, looked down at the table, and said, “Because of my tendency toward depression, I’d have to move someplace where it’s sunny and open most of the time. I was thinking about some place like Phoenix in the winter and Vale or in the mountains near Denver in the summer. I’d rent the Colorado place to skiers in the winter, maybe take a week there myself. In the summer for the Phoenix place, I’d probably just have someone come in once a week to make sure everything was okay. For a job, I’d probably do contract programming. But I’ve also thought about giving up coding altogether and go into teaching at some university where maybe I could find someone to spend the rest of my life with.” With that last comment, I looked up and gave him the “gotcha” look. He quickly got what the look meant, then he looked down at the table, grinned really big and chuckled in a way that meant he conceded defeat this round. I hoped his chuckle meant there would be no more conversations for the rest of the day regarding the decision he still had to make.
As Chad finished breakfast, I went back to the bedroom closet and got the blankets, pillows, and towels. I also got a different movie because I didn’t want Chad to see the ending of the movie I originally chose. As I walked into the living room, Chad had already put the movie into the player and started it.
“I thought we’d watch something different,” I said.
Chad looked over at me and said, “Too late. I’ve already started it.”
When I reached down to stop the movie, Chad caught my hand, pulled it away and held it, and said, “It must be something you don’t want me to see, so I want to see it.”
“Our previous discussions have changed the situation, so we should probably change the movie.”
Chad gave me one of those deep, penetrating gazes and responded quietly, “I still want to see it.”
After looking into those eyes, I sighed and gave in. I knew that I wouldn’t be able to talk him out of it, so I spread the blankets out and lay down without taking off my clothes. Chad looked at me kind of funny and I said, “The clothes will come off soon enough, so get your good-looking ass down here so I don’t have to look at your eyes.” He chuckled and lay down in his sweats next to me with me spooning his backside.
In the first sex scene of the movie, Chad sat up and took off his clothes. He snuggled next to me again and began to lightly stroke his cock. Soon I had him shift to his back and I stroked his cock for him. It was a long scene with a long build-up and Chad probably would have shot his wad soon in the scene if I would have let him. But I made him wait and suffer through the actors shooting their wads in that scene. The second scene was a shower scene, and the main actor had a really hard cock in that scene. Knowing what I knew about the movie, I brought Chad to the brink a couple of times and then waited until he came down a little. Then I stroked him hard as the actor stroked himself hard. Soon the actor started to cum with several large loads splattering on the shower floor. Chad saw the action, closed his eyes, arched his back and neck and shot a large load onto his chest, followed by a large number of smaller loads all over his stomach. Over a period of another few minutes, he finally came back to reality. Using a nearby towel, I wiped his body so that he could continue to watch the movie without worrying about his cum running on the blanket below him.
In a later scene in the movie, the older guy “entertains” a customer while the younger guy looks on and learns from the experience. The action is pretty hot and I reach down to stroke Chad’s cock again. He’s entranced by all the different positions he sees the guys in. Toward the end of the scene, the customer cums really hard, shooting many loads all over his chest and stomach. The older guy shoots several large loads on him as well. I feel Chad’s cock begin to pulse in my hand as he shoots another fairly large load again, not as much as earlier, but a fairly good set of wads on his stomach. After a few moments of recovering, Chad looked around for the towel, cleaned himself, and then snuggled next to me covering both of us with a blanket.
When we got to the final scene in the movie, Chad finally realized why I had chosen the movie in the first place and why I didn’t want to watch it now: the older guy was in love with the younger guy, and the younger guy finally discovers he’s in love with the older guy. He watched the first part of the scene unfold, the older guy not really sure that the two of them should fall in love, the younger guy kissing the older guy to let him know he cared. After a while I felt his eyes on me, so I looked at him, then rolled to my back to avoid them. I was halfway hoping that he’d just watch the movie and jack himself off without involving me. However, Chad had other ideas. He rolled on top of me, pinned my arms to the floor, then positioned his legs so that my legs were spread and pinned as well. Chad waited in this position and allowed me to drink in what I saw: the broad chest and narrow stomach, both covered with hair and muscles, a hard cock and large balls, and that perfect face with penetrating blue eyes. What got me this time was that his eyes also appeared to be a little sad. I think he finally got what I had been hoping for.
Chad’s dominating position over me always had its desired effect. I could never suppress how his body affected me, and this time was no different. My cock got rock hard almost instantly. Because I still had my clothes on, Chad couldn’t see any of this, so he let go of one of my arms and felt my crotch with that free hand. He gently massaged me, then moved into a sitting position between my legs and slowly slipped my sweat pants and underwear off my lower body. From there he pulled me up into a sitting position, put his hands under the bottom edge of my t-shirt, and pulled it off over my head. After pulling my t-shirt off, he cupped my face in his hands and we looked at each other for a while. I so badly wanted to kiss him, but he wouldn’t let me. He seemed to sense that or maybe my face showed it, so he did something good for both of us: while sitting there, his legs over mine, he pulled me into our standard hug and we hugged for a couple of minutes. After that he pushed me gently to the floor, moved his legs in between mine and lay on top of me, his face nuzzling and kissing my neck and ear.
I finally relaxed and let the adrenaline take over. I wrapped my arms and legs around Chad’s body and felt his cock probe me. He finally found my hole and pushed against it gently and then more firmly. Soon I relaxed and he slipped partway into me; the pain was at the same time both excruciating and intensely enjoyable. He waited while I adjusted, and when he felt me relax, he pushed completely into me. While leaning on one elbow and nuzzling my neck, he reached down between us and started to stroke my cock with the palm of his hand, his fingers reaching down and stroking my balls at the same time. The combination of his hand on my cock and his hard cock in my ass took my breath away, and I shuddered and instinctively tightened my ass muscle around his cock. The new tightness around his cock made him moan and rub me even faster, which caused me to groan and clamp tighter around his cock. Then Chad started to slowly move his cock in and out of my ass which caused me to want to try to push him out. My body went into overload trying to figure out what to do, push out or get tighter. Soon I started to alternate between both, one second pushing out, the next second tightening around his cock.
The feeling for Chad must have been intense because he moaned loudly and picked up the pace of his fucking and his rubbing on my cock. Both of us were soon moaning and groaning loudly next to each other, and those sounds further reinforced what each of us felt. I don’t know when, but I faintly remembered moaning loudly and saying, “Fuck me Chad, fuck me hard.” He responded by picking up the speed of both the fucking and rubbing. Last thing I remembered is opening my eyes, seeing the intense pleasure on Chad’s face next to me, and glancing at the TV as I saw the older guy shooting his load all over his chest and stomach while the younger guy fucked him hard. That drove me over the edge and I moaned loudly, arched my back, and started shooting my load all over Chad’s hand and my stomach. Chad didn’t cum with me that time. He held on for another thirty or so seconds, then he pulled out of my ass and moved his hand from my cock to his cock. His body shook as he frantically stroked himself. Soon he said, “Oh, FUUUUCK,” then I felt his cock start shooting load after load after load of hot, thick, ropey cum on my chest, upper abs, and all over my cock.
About fifteen seconds after shooting his load on my stomach, Chad nearly collapsed on top of me. He did it gently, but the full weight of his upper body was on me almost instantly. I initially struggled to breathe and he soon realized what he had done. He pulled up some and we adjusted our arms into our now-standard arrangement so that we could hug while he lay on top of me. The weight of his body on mine squished the cum between us. Although it felt weird at first, after a short time I began to like it. The slickness dried a little and became something like a glue that physically held us together. I’m not sure that he did this on purpose, but the symbolism of our cum mixing and holding us together made me realize that maybe there had been more to this particular encounter than I had thought. But then again, maybe I was just over-reaching for an affection that I might never have.
Rather than get all sappy, I started scratching Chad’s back and said, “Let’s go take a shower.”
He chuckled and quietly said, “Sure, now you say that, just as I get settled in.”
I noted the sarcasm in his voice, so I reached down and grabbed his sides with both hands and began to tickle him pretty hard. As usual, he reacted quickly, pinning me to the floor. This time, however, he was laughing and had a sparkle in his eyes. Something had changed. Maybe there was a possibility in our relationship after all. But as soon as I noticed the sparkle, it and the smile that went with it disappeared. He had remembered that he still had a decision to make. I was sad again and hoped that it didn’t show.
We got up slowly and collected all the stuff from in front of the TV. Chad carried the clothes back to the bathroom, while I carried the blankets and pillows to the closet and the towels to the bathroom. When I got to the bathroom, Chad had the water already running in the shower and was warming it up for us.
We soaped each other taking our time, roaming our hands over each other’s body, all over the chest and stomach, the arms and legs, the back, and intimately around each other’s cock, balls and ass. In a surprising move, Chad took my hands, pushed them and me against the chilly tile wall and said, “Close your eyes and turn your head.” I did so and he slowly and deliberately kissed up and down my neck on one side, then kissed under my chin to the other side, where he kissed up and down my neck again.
The effect he wanted is what he got: I got hard again thinking about what he might do to me next in this position. Unfortunately, my ass hurt from what we had done that weekend. With some reluctance I said, “I don’t think I can take you inside me again.”
Chad continued to kiss my neck and slowly worked his way up to one of my ears. Quietly he said in that ear, “What makes you think I was going to fuck you?” The implication made me rock hard. He confirmed what I was thinking when he pulled back to look at me, let go of one of my hands, and reached down to stroke me. As he looked at me, he got a look in his eyes that I hadn’t seen yet. I didn’t know what it was, but I’d find out later for sure.
He had brought some lube into the shower and was soon applying it to my cock and his ass. He turned away and leaned against the handicap bars, exposing his exquisite, hairy ass to me. I moved in behind him and guided my cock to his hole. I slowly pushed against him, his ass muscle resisting at first, but slowly opening until I slid into him easily. As I slid in, he threw his head back and groaned loudly. I slowly pushed all the way in, held that position for a short time, then slowly started to fuck his tight, wet, hot ass. Like I had before a number of times before, I watched my cock disappear into his ass as I pushed forward and reappear as I pulled back. With each stroke, Chad’s moans became more intense. I leaned forward and wrapped both arms around him. One hand stroked his hairy chest and stomach, and the other reached down and stroked his cock. He got hard after a few strokes, his moans became more intense, and his ass muscle tightened around my cock. That caused me to moan more and pick up the pace, both in back and in front. Soon we were both spiraling upward toward our peaks. I went faster and faster. After another minute or two, I felt that familiar boiling feeling deep inside me. I noticed Chad’s breathing had become ragged and uneven. Both of us were there, so I went a little faster, and that tripped both of us. Chad’s cock began to pulse and with the intensity of his moans, I’m sure he was unloading another big load. The pulsing of his cock made his ass muscle tighten around me and I shot another big load, spurt after spurt, landing and mixing inside his ass, again and again and again. We were both lost in the extreme pleasure of the moment, neither of us wanting it to end.
Unfortunately, as with all good things, eventually we both got soft and had to start moving around again. We did our final cleanups, including the enema treatments similar to what we had given each other the day before. We got out of the shower, dried off and dried our hair, and then gave each other the “lotion-up-the-butt” treatment to try to cool off our overly-sensitive asses. Once done, we washed our hands thoroughly and got dressed in clean underwear, warm sweat pants, and heavy t-shirts. Before heading back to the kitchen for lunch, I stopped Chad and looked at him. Without saying a word to each other, we fell into one of our desperate hugs, my right arm under his left arm, his right arm under my left arm, each holding on to the other for a long time. I realized much too late that this was probably the last hug that we’d give each other, maybe forever. If I had realized it then, I would have definitely held on for much longer than I did.
Over lunch, I asked Chad what time he wanted to leave. He said that he wanted to leave around 7 or 8pm. Then he added, “I still want to watch Brokeback Mountain.”
When I looked up to try to talk him out of it, I got one of those penetrating gazes that always lets him get what he wanted. I sighed knowing I should try to talk him out of it, but shortly gave up and said, “Sure.” After thinking through the timing, I followed up with, “Football’s on at one. How about we watch that, have dinner around five, and then start the movie around five-thirty?”
With a sly grin, he said, “Sounds like a good plan to me.”
I immediately got the reference to the work conversation of earlier, so I glared at him and, with a small grin on my face, said, “Prick.”
We both chuckled at the small conversation. After a short time, we cleaned up lunch and moved into the living room to watch the game. As usual, I fell asleep during half-time and woke up about the middle of the fourth quarter. When I woke up, there was a blanket over me, and I noticed Chad was asleep with a blanket as well. Even though we had started to distance ourselves from each other in preparation for him going home that evening, he still showed an incredible sensitivity which I had not seen in most guys. While watching him sleep, all I could hope for was that he’d be happy in whatever relationship he finally chose.
Just after the game finished, I quietly got up, changed the channel to another game to keep the background noise about the same, and walked into the kitchen. Trying not to wake Chad, I got out the food, fired up the ovens, and started fixing dinner. About fifteen minutes later, I heard the TV click off and Chad appeared shortly after that. He looked relaxed, but the look I had seen in the shower earlier was there again. It quickly disappeared and he asked if there was anything he needed to do. I replied that there wasn’t and that dinner would be ready in about another thirty minutes.
Chad looked at me for about another ten seconds like he was going to say something, then he got that look again on his face. In a flash, I knew the look meant that he had made the decision to go back to his ex-wife. I felt a sadness creep over me, but I also knew it was what he had to do. Although I had looked down at the floor when I realized what the look was, I stood up straight, looked back at him and really tried to show that I knew and accepted what he had to do. I was never sure about my non-verbal communication with Chad, but it seemed to register with him this time. Soon after that, he turned away and returned to the couch to watch some more TV.
Given the distraction of his decision, I almost burned the steaks, but managed to get away with a nice, healthy brown outside. I also made a salad and sweet potatoes to go with the steaks. Eventually, dinner was ready and we sat down to eat.
Conversation at dinner was minimal until I asked, “So, what do you have planned for the week?”
When Chad looked up at me, I grinned hoping he’d catch the implication. He did and grinned back. After a few moments he said, “I have a couple of big meetings tomorrow afternoon to get some new contracts in place. Then the rest of the week is pretty much unplanned.” With the last statement, he grinned back at me. After a fairly long pause, he got serious again and said, “But not everything in my work life can be as well-structured as yours is right now. I pretty much have to be able to adapt to anything that comes along each day. Sometimes I wish I could make better plans, but that doesn’t appear to be the case right now.”
He was right about the chaos at work. Our business was linked to a number of customers who couldn’t seem to make up their minds about what they wanted to do and where the money would come from. I happened to be one of the luckier ones that had a fairly consistent customer, even though they could be incredibly painful at times.
Both of us got about halfway through dinner and had to stop. Our stomachs had shrunk through the weekend and we just couldn’t hold as much food as usual. So I saved what was left in separate containers and put in the fridge. I fully intended to give Chad his later, but he saw what I was doing and said for me to finish his later. With that one statement, he had confirmed what I suspected earlier: he wouldn’t be back, at least not anytime soon.
About five-thirty, we sat down to watch Brokeback Mountain. I cranked up the surround sound on the stereo with the TV to get the full effect of the movie. As usual, I got lost in the lush scenery and the poignant sounds of the guitar in the background music. And, as usual, I got pulled into the story in a way that bound me to the characters, something I always hoped to avoid but never seemed to be able to do with this movie.
The only thing spoken during the movie was after the first time Jack and Ennis “did it.” Chad’s quiet remark was, “That had to hurt,” and I had to laugh. Through most of the rest of the movie neither of us said anything. In the scene toward the end of the movie when Ennis called Jack’s wife, I had to lean my head back against the couch and close my eyes. I knew what was coming next. When it happened, I felt Chad jerk slightly on the couch and then clear his throat. Later when Ennis drove to Jack’s parents house, I had to get up and go to the study. From the study, I finished the movie separate from Chad, crying quietly as heard the dialog and music. The situation grew more difficult to handle when I realized some of the parallels between the two movie characters and Chad and me.
Luckily for me, as the movie ended, Chad lowered the volume on the stereo and finally turned off the TV. That gave me enough time to compose myself, wipe my eyes dry, and try to keep from becoming a babbling idiot.
Soon Chad appeared at the door to the study and said, “I have to go.”
Fortifying myself with all the willpower I could, I looked at him without tears and said, “Sure,” and walked him to the door. As he put on his coat and picked up his gym bag, I said, “Be careful of the idiot drivers going home.” Then after a pause I said, “I’ll be here if you need me.”
With a sad look on his face, one that caused a lump in my throat, he said, “Thanks.” Then he opened the door and headed down the stairs to the condo building’s front door. As he got to that door, he paused for a moment, but then opened it and walked out without looking back up at me.
I closed my own door and walked to the kitchen to do some final cleanup. I thought that I should be crying right now, but I wasn’t. We had had a good weekend, one that we would both remember fondly and probably in awe at what we had done, but one that now only a memory. I was okay with that until I got to the kitchen and saw his t-shirt sitting on the counter. As I picked it up, wave after wave of an intense sadness covered me. The line, “I don’t know how to quit you,” and the images of the two shirts from the movie came back to haunt me. Flashbacks from the weekend also appeared in my mind: the Saturday morning fight, all the sex we had especially the ones where we nuzzled each other’s neck, and finally, the looks from Chad that told me that he was going back to his ex-wife. I got lost in tears as I turned with my back to the counter to lean against it. Not really realizing it, I slid down the cabinets to a sitting position on the kitchen floor and began to cry into Chad’s t-shirt.
After what felt like a long time, I realized that I had to get over this, just as I had gotten over the loss of my wife and kids. “Plan B” became my new plan, so I forced myself to get up and move into the study to start looking for a new place to go. As I sat there, I also realized that the computer had become the place where I had written about my past with the people whom I had lived with and met along the way. The computer had become the thing that I had talked to over the past year and a half. Unfortunately, it couldn’t be the thing this time. I needed to talk to a human and how I wished that the human would be Chad. I was obsessed with Chad, but I knew I had to let it go. But rather than let it go quickly, I sat back in my chair, clutched the shirt and held it close to my face, and continued to cry for a long time.
What was probably about thirty minutes later, a ringing phone interrupted my crying. As it rang, all I could think of was, “Damn it. Why can’t I just be left alone for a while.” But I cleared my eyes and looked at the Caller ID. My heart jumped when I saw Chad’s cell phone number. I answered with a raspiness in my voice. With a raspiness in his voice, Chad said, “I need to come up. I forgot something.”
Looking at the t-shirt, I hoped that he wasn’t coming to take this away as well. But I had to face the fact that he wasn’t going to be in my life anymore. What probably turned out to be a long time for him, I finally answered, “Sure, come on up.”
I had to hurry to dry my eyes and blow my nose. I probably took longer than I should have because when I opened the door, Chad was already there waiting to get in. As we moved into the front hallway, Chad closed the door and locked it. He pulled out his cell phone, held it up, and said, “I’ve always hated cell phones. If you have one, everyone expects you to be available all the time. No one lets you have any privacy, and no one can seem to wait until a couple of days later for you to return a call.” With his voice wavering a little, he continued, “I had seventeen voice mails on my phone from Friday about this time until now. Six of them were from relatives wondering where I was and if I was okay. I called my mom and let her know everything is okay and to please call the others. She wanted to know more, but I had to put her off for a couple of days.” After that he paused for a long time. It looked like he was having difficulty saying the next statement. Then he said, “And the remaining eleven were from my ex. She even sent me a text message that said ‘Should have never left you.’”
Although I wondered why he was telling me all of this, a lump still formed in my throat and my heart wanted my body to reach out, wrap around him, and protect him from the pain. But I couldn’t. She was breaking the guy’s heart, and I hoped that he’d be okay through it all.
Chad soon continued, “That text message was apparently sent sometime Saturday afternoon. I listened through all eleven messages from start to finish, and ten of them were about how sorry she was for the divorce, and how things were rotten in California, and how she wanted to come back. My heart was breaking because I really wanted to get back with her.”
With that statement, I noticed that Chad’s eyes were beginning to tear up. That caused mine to do the same. But I couldn’t have been prepared for what he said next.
“Then I listened to the eleventh and final message. It was about two hours ago. She apologized for the other messages, and asked me to delete them if I hadn’t already heard them.” He paused, looked at the cell phone, and then looked up at me with tears in his eyes and said, “She told me that the guy she had been dating finally proposed to her last night, and she had accepted. In her babbling about everything, I finally found out that this guy is the same one that had dumped her just before we met in college. That’s when I finally realized that I’ve been a rebound love of hers for the last seven years. I thought that we were truly in love, but when this guy came back into her life, our life, she fell back in love with him and out of love with me. And now they’re going to get married.”
I was stunned by what Chad had just said. I had heard him, but none of it really registered. I watched as he turned off the cell phone, flipped it shut, and put it in his pocket. Then he reached up and cupped my face with his hands. He slowly leaned toward me, and when his face was about three inches from mine, he said, “So this is why I called. I had to come back up here because I forgot to do this.” He completed the sentence by leaning forward and kissing me tentatively on the lips. As he pulled back, he said, “I also figured out something else. If you were a female, I’d be asking you to marry me right now. But you’re a guy and I didn’t know how to deal with that. While listening to all the crap on the phone, I finally figured out that I want to be around you not because you’re a guy, but because you really care about me, and not just physically, but also mentally and emotionally. You care for me like no one else ever has.” With his eyes almost completely filled with tears and his voice shaking as he spoke, he said, “I figure that a love like this doesn’t come along every day, so I should make sure I don’t lose it.” He paused and finally said, “I couldn’t say this to any other guy, but I can to you. I love you.”
We fall into one of our desperate hugs, his left arm over my right, my left arm over his right. Instantly I’m crying again and I struggle to clearly say, “I love you, too.” We stayed and cried together in that hug for a long time, each getting used to the permanent warmth, comfort, and security the other had to offer. For me, the crying was a release of the tension of the weekend as a new happiness entered my life. For Chad, maybe it was a release of the past so he could move on and into the future.
After we recovered and stopped the crying, Chad slowly pulled back, the side of his face brushing against mine, our beard stubble lightly sandpapering each other’s face as he moved back. He stopped when his nose was about an inch away from my nose. I could feel the heat of his face near mine, and our eyes were the only things each other could see. As always, his blue eyes made me weak in the knees.
After a few moments, we both turned our heads slightly and leaned forward until our lips met. As they touched, I felt a slight electricity pass between us. We kept our mouths closed as we kissed each other tentatively the first few times, but quickly each of us opened our mouths and our tongues began to playfully push each other around. After a while, Chad slowly pulled away from me. I noticed a slight grin on his face and he quietly said, “That was good, really good.” I couldn’t help but grin back.
Chad got a serious look on his face once again and leaned in to kiss me. This time he kissed me harder. Our mouths opened more, and our tongues pushed harder and quicker against each other. This kiss was much hotter and more intense than I ever expected, and the effect turned on not only my cock but also all the rest of my body. The passion mounted even more when Chad pushed me against the wall as we continued to kiss. Our bodies began to grind into each other. I would have loved to played with that body with both hands, but since we were still in our hugging position only my right hand was free. So I moved it down his back, found the bottom of his t-shirt, moved my hand underneath it, and then let my hand wander up his back, touching and lightly massaging the muscles in his back as we kissed.
We could have continued the kiss for the rest of the night, but I wanted more. I moved my right hand around Chad’s body from his back to his front and pushed him away slightly. As he moved back, he continued to stare into my eyes with that deep, penetrating gaze made me want him even more. I stroked his hairy chest and stomach, then moved my hand down to the waistband of his sweat pants. I pulled the waistband out and slowly pushed my fingers down inside. I didn’t have to push too far down to find the head of Chad’s rock-hard cock pointing straight up. I made a V-shape with my first, middle, and ring fingers and slowly pushed them between the underside of his cock and his briefs. After the fingers settled into place against his cock, I moved my hand up and down to let him know what I was doing. Chad closed his eyes and let out a soft moan as I slowly stroked him. With that same hand, I pushed Chad slowly away, turned him, and led him to the bedroom. As we walked to the bedroom, my fingers naturally stroked his cock, and this seemed to turn him on even more because his cock got even longer and harder as we walked.
Once in the bedroom, Chad put both hands on the sides of my face, his thumbs stroking my sideburns and his fingers moving into the hair behind my ears. He leaned forward and kissed me passionately. I reached under his t-shirt with my left hand and rubbed his chest, while continuing to slowly massage his cock with my right hand. Soon he pulled away and removed his t-shirt and the rest of his clothes. I took all my clothes off at the same time. I reached for and opened a tube of lube, squeezed some out and began to lube his cock. The coolness of the lube on his hot cock made him quietly gasp for a few breaths. His breathing quickly returned to normal as I felt the heat of his cock come through the lube to my fingers. While massaging him, I also noticed that his cock was sticking up at a 45 degree angle just like the first time we got together. This was like the first time for him, and it felt the same way to me.
“There’s extra lube on the head to make it easier to enter me,” I said. Then I wiped my hand on a nearby towel, threw back the sheet and blankets on the bed, crawled on and lay down on my back with my legs spread. Chad slowly crawled onto the bed and over top of me, stopping when his face about three inches directly above my face. The sight of this hairy stud over me made my cock even harder than I expected. I lifted my legs and soon felt his cockhead at my ass. Ever so slowly Chad pushed into me, watching me as he did. When his cockhead finally entered my ass, I closed my eyes, arched my back because of the initial pain and let out a low moan. The pain subsided quickly and I opened my eyes to meet his. As I grinned to let him know I was okay, he lowered himself and began to kiss me again. As we kissed, he slowly pushed his cock all the way into me, his balls resting gently against my ass cheeks.
The incredible sensation of everything caught me off-guard and I had to break the kiss because I had forgotten to breathe. Apparently he had forgotten to breathe too, so we pulled away slightly from each other and panted for a few moments to catch our breath. Soon Chad started to kiss me again, and we both breathed in and out of our noses. I thought the moment couldn’t be any hotter until he started to slowly piston in and out of my ass. His cockhead was huge and it was rubbing against my already-sensitive prostate. As he picked up speed, I moaned into our kiss. He obviously was feeling my tightness around him because he moaned into the kiss as well.
Just when I thought the feeling couldn’t get any more intense, Chad did something that I had never thought to do: instead of keeping his legs bent while fucking me, he straightened them. The result was that his lower body pressed heavily against my lower body and trapped my cock between the two of us. The movement of his body as he fucked me, along with the pressure and the hair from his and my lower abs, massaged and tickled my cock. The underside of my cock lined up with the slight depression between the left and right side of his abdominal muscles, so it didn’t slip around too much. The result of all of this was an incredible pleasure: the kissing, his cock in my ass, and my cock trapped between our bodies was far more pleasurable than I ever dreamed. I broke the kiss again, and hoarsely whispered, “Keep doing this.” He caught on quickly, pressing and moving his lower abdominal area all over my cock along with gyrating his hips to piston his cock in and out of my ass. The whole situation made my lower body begin to quiver. I closed my eyes and moaned loudly from his efforts.
I couldn’t tell you when because I was lost in the sensation of it all, but Chad soon began to kiss me again. His tongue and my tongue battled it out. His tongue fucked my mouth deeply. I pushed back and fucked his mouth with my tongue for a while. Eventually, he pulled away, and I had to open my eyes to see why. He had this sly grin on his face because he knew what he was doing to me. With a passion in my voice that I never knew I had in me, I said to him, “Fuck me, bud, fuck me hard.” With that he kissed me again while fucking me faster and faster.
A few minutes later, I began to feel that familiar boiling sensation build in the base of my cock. Chad must have felt something, too, because he stopped kissing me and began to nuzzle my neck, all while moaning loudly from the sensation of my tightness around his cock. After a while, his breathing started to get ragged and I knew it wouldn’t be long for either of us. The intensity of the whole moment spiraled quickly upward, both of us headed for incredible orgasms. Chad soon started pounding my ass deeply, and the pressure and rapid movement of his hairy body on my cock sent me over the edge. I shot load after load after load in the narrow confines between us, my hips pushing forcefully against Chad’s body as a reflex from the intense power of the orgasm. At the same time, Chad moaned loudly and I felt his cock spurt deep within me time and time and time again, the hot loads all splashing around inside me, his hips pressing forcefully into me as he came. Wave after wave of intense pleasure covered both of us. We shook and groaned loudly as we came, so not only did we feel each other’s orgasm, but we also heard the incredible pleasure each was experiencing.
The high each of us felt slowly diminished. Chad moved his arms into our hugging position and stayed on top of me for a long time while we both recovered. I ran my hand up and down his back, alternately gripping him to try to make him feel closer to me or massaging his back just because I wanted to. Eventually his cock grew soft and slipped out of me. At first I was sad because the sex was over, but then I realized that the good looking, smart, and studly guy on top of me was going to be around for a while. I tried to suppress the emotions, but couldn’t do so completely. I got a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes. After sniffing a couple of times, Chad pushed up and looked at me.
“Sorry for all the emotions,” I said. “This weekend has been roller coaster for me. But I realize that these are happy emotions and I can’t seem to control them.” I must have gotten this big grin on my face because Chad’s face lit up too. “All of this is quite a bit different from the emotion-filled weekend I had about a year and a half ago.”
Chad’s eyes began to glisten because he understood the reference to “the accident.” He said, “I’ll never leave you. I promise.”
I paused for a few seconds and then said, “I wish I could hold you to that promise, but neither of us can say that because we don’t always control our destiny. However, I will take you for as long as I can have you. Besides, you’re still young and one day you may find that cute female that takes you places where I can’t.” I noticed more tears in Chad’s eyes so I reached up and began to wipe them away. As I touched the side of his face, the flood gates opened for both of us. We hugged and cried together for a while. We didn’t know what the future held for us, but we knew we had each other to depend on while moving through it.
After a while I reached for a towel and began to dry what I could on both of us. It soon became wet with our tears, sweat, and other bodily fluids. As I dried us, I couldn’t help but think about how the towel symbolized the mixing of Chad and me. After a few seconds, I also realized how much of an emotional old fart I’d become and how I needed let thoughts like that go. But it was a good thought needless to say.
“Can you spend the night?” I asked. Chad moved up to my face and kissed me firmly indicating that he wouldn’t be leaving any time soon. We kissed for a while longer, not as passionately as during sex, but still quite enjoyable.
I knew we were both exhausted from the emotions and physical activities of the weekend, but I didn’t realize how much until Chad almost fell asleep while kissing me. We both needed to get to sleep soon. So I slowly pushed him away and said, “Let’s get a little more cleaned up before going to sleep.” We got up, used the bathroom, put on our underwear and t-shirts and crawled back into bed. I turned on the alarm and noticed that it was about 10 pm. For some reason, I must have looked at the clock for a long time, because Chad reached over and touched my back. After feeling his touch, I turned off the light and lay down. Without saying a thing, Chad snuggled next to me, putting a leg over one of my legs, an arm over my body, and his head to the side of my head. He was soon asleep and the rhythm of his breathing helped me settle into a deeply relaxed sleep.
I didn’t sleep completely through the night, but I slept well. Every time I woke up, Chad and I were still touching somewhere. Once he was spooning me, his arm around my body. Once I was spooning him, my arm around his body. Once he had his head on my chest. Once I found us holding hands: Chad had obviously made sure that our fingers were intertwined while I had slept. The gesture made me cry quietly for his sensitivity. I also quietly thanked my wife for sending someone like Chad my way. I had made sure she was always satisfied and happy with me, but she also knew I was a little different than other guys. Although we had been perfect for each other at the time, she had found the perfect partner for me at this stage in my life. As I fell back asleep again, I felt truly happy and thankful.
Monday started early with the birds chirping outside the window. The sun hadn’t risen yet, but it was getting lighter outside every minute. The rains of Sunday had moved on and Monday was going to be a bright and sunny day. I quietly got up to go to the bathroom, hoping not to disturb Chad because we still had about an hour before the alarm was to go off. While there, I washed my mouth out with mouthwash. As I crawled into bed, Chad surprised me and did the same thing. The light from outside made the room somewhat brighter between the time he went into the bathroom and came back out. When he came out, I noticed that he had no clothes on. I got to get a good look at his form, especially his profile with his semi-hard cock hanging down.
Chad crawled back under the covers and scooted over next to me, his body touching mine. As he reached out to touch my chest, he looked at me and said, “You need to take off your t-shirt and underwear. It’s morning, and it’s, well, it’s your turn.”
I chuckled at the comment, but after a few moments I got serious and said, “Doing you this morning will have some adverse effects on your day, like making you want to go sit on the toilet all the time. Given the kind of meetings you’ve got planned for today, I’d rather not be the one who causes problems for you. We shouldn’t have sex this morning. If needed, I’ll make it up to you later this week or next weekend.”
Chad thought about what I had said for a moment or two. Then he reached over and ran his hand all over my t-shirt and said, “But if you don’t do me this morning, I’m going to be thinking about it a lot all day. So I still want you to fuck me.”
“I’m not sure I can do this. I really don’t think it’s a smart idea,” I said.
“Just take off the clothes, please,” Chad said quietly.
I sighed and did as he requested. As I lay back, Chad began running his fingers through the hair on my chest and stomach, and eventually worked his way down to my crotch. He wrapped his hand around my cock and gave it a number of good tugs trying to get me hard. It felt good, but my practical side was overriding my horniness this morning and my cock just wouldn’t get hard.
Seeing that I was frustrating him, I said, “Sorry, bud, but my heart’s not in it this morning. I really don’t want to cause you problems through today.”
Chad sighed and said, “Okay, looks like we’re going to have to do this my way then. Spread your legs.”
I breathed deeply and spread my legs as Chad moved in between them. I was expecting him to lift my legs and fuck me hard and fast, but he surprised me. Within a couple of seconds, he moved both of my hands over my head and pinned them to the bed with his hands, while at the same time he moved his legs so his calves pinned my thighs to the bed. He had restrained me (again) so that the only part of my body that could move was my head. After restraining me, he just waited, giving me time to take a good look at him. As I looked, I couldn’t help but marvel at the incredibly handsome face and well-developed body above me. Some of the words that raced through my mind were powerful, hairy, attractive, and impressive. The effect on me was the same as it had been the previous times he had “restrained” me: my cock got rock hard within seconds. A sly grin appeared on Chad’s face when he saw that his actions were having the desired effect.
During this time, the light from outside had gotten bright enough that I also noticed the sparkle in Chad’s captivating blue eyes. While still restraining me, he slowly leaned down toward my face, those eyes holding my attention as he got closer. He leaned toward me until he was about three or four inches from my face, then he stopped. He had done it again: he had turned my reluctance into a desire that I almost couldn’t control, and he had done it expertly. Not only had my cock responded, but my whole body responded with a adrenaline-induced rush and a huge desire to nail his ass to the bed. Practicality went out the window, and without really thinking I quietly said, “You’re one hell of a good looking guy.” Seeing my response, Chad smiled and finally leaned down those last few inches and planted his lips firmly on mine. We kissed tentatively at first, then more heated by the moment.
As we kissed, Chad slowly let go of my hands and moved his arms and hands around my sides and under my back. He then moved his left leg outside of my right leg and pushed it inward. Then he did the same with his right leg and my left leg. When done, his legs were spread and mine were in between his. Finally, he pulled out of kiss, kissed my neck a few more times, then whispered into my ear, “Roll with me.”
As we rolled, the excitement began to build more. I looked to the nightstand for a tube of lube, but Chad read my mind and said, “While I was in the bathroom, I put lube on and in my ass. You should be able to fuck me without needing anything else.” All I could think of was how smart this guy was too.
We shifted around some and then he lifted his legs. I bent my legs at the knees bringing up my thighs next to his butt. I positioned my cock at his hole then slowly pushed into him. His ass muscle resisted at first, but it slowly yielded as I pressed harder into him. His ass muscle suddenly relaxed and my cock slid about halfway into him causing him to yelp from the initial pain. I waited for about thirty seconds and then slid all the way into him, my balls touching his ass. He looked like he was in pain, but I could never tell. To help him along, I leaned toward him and nuzzled and kissed his neck for a while.
When he began to moan lightly, I pushed away from him and began to slowly move my cock in and out of his ass. Apparently I was doing what he needed me to do, because he arched his back and moaned “Oh, my God” loudly. Then I straightened out my legs as he had done the night before. Chad gasped at the feeling of his cock being confined between our two bodies. With a kind of panting in his voice he said, “So this is what it feels like. This is intense. I’m not sure I can hold back much longer.”
I chuckled and said, “Who says you can have only one orgasm this morning?” With that said, I picked up the speed of my fucking and moving around on his cock. I could tell he was going to cum soon because his breathing got ragged and uneven. To help him along, I picked up the pace even more. In response, he began to lightly buck his hips against me. After a few more seconds, Chad arched his back and groaned loudly. I felt his ass muscle tighten around my cock followed by the heat of his cum as it spurted out of him time and time again into the narrow confines between our two bodies. I watched him as he came and the intense beauty of his face made my almost cum as well. I had to breathe deeply and control myself so that I wouldn’t cum with him.
I dramatically slowed the pace of my thrusts after Chad had cum so that he’d have some time to recover. Over a short period of time, his cum moved and coated all of his cock, making it slippery and sensitive in the areas where it touched. Because of this, I noticed how hot his cock was and that he hadn’t gotten soft. His face showed an incredible ecstasy. So I picked up the pace again, fucking his ass with long strokes, more deeply than I had ever pushed into him before. I also moved down and began to nuzzle and kiss his neck. He put his hands on the sides of my face, moved my face to his, and guided my lips to his. We kissed intensely, our tongues sometimes battling each other and sometimes slowly caressing each other.
Soon I shifted into overdrive, pounding Chad’s ass and moving my body back and forth quickly over his cock. We had to break our kiss because we were breathing too heavily. In a seemingly natural move, I moved my face close to his, the left sides of our faces touching each other as we continued to breath and moan heavily. Chad put his hands on my back and helped me rock back and forth over his cock. Each of us was rapidly approaching our peaks, the intensity of the moment spiraling upward quickly and nearly out of control. His breathing was ragged and uneven. I felt that all too familiar boiling feeling deep within my cock. A few seconds later, Chad squeezed tightly around my cock and that tightness sent me up to and then over the edge. I began to shoot deep within him, load after load after load, all mixing around inside his ass. At the same time I also felt a new heat on my stomach as Chad’s cock unloaded again and again and again between us. While cumming, each of us pushed our hips hard forcefully into the other, both of our bodies responding reflexively to the intensity of our orgasms, the heat we felt from each other, and the loud noises of intense pleasure that each of us heard in the other’s moans and groans.
As with the previous night, the high each of us felt from the sex slowly diminished. I moved my arms into our hugging position and stayed on top of him for a long time. Our breathing slowly returned to normal. As my cock grew soft and slipped out of him, I repositioned myself so that I could nuzzle and kiss his neck. At one point I said softly into Chad’s ear, “I love you.” Immediately Chad responded by hugging me tighter. But what surprised me was the wetness that I felt on the side of his face a short time later. I pulled back to look at his face and found those intense blue eyes full of tears. I smiled at him with a knowing smile, as I had experienced those feelings the previous night. He responded with one of his famous megawatt smiles that made me feel good all over. After a few moments, I leaned down and lightly kissed his lips and then continued to nuzzle and kiss his neck for a while longer.
Unfortunately for both of us, just as we got settled in for a little while longer, the radio on the clock-radio turned on to announce that it was 6:30am, time to get up and start a new week. I thought, “Damn it, why now?” But Chad did what I should have done: with most of his hand, he reached over and smacked the top of the clock-radio a few times until he finally hit the snooze button. I noticed that he had hit it fairly hard so I had to say, “That had to hurt.”
“It deserved it,” he said. I had to chuckle at the statement because I thought he had hurt his hand in the process, when in reality he had treated the clock like a child that had done something bad and needed a spanking. He may have hurt his hand slightly, but he had done what he needed to do.
I slid off Chad to one side, but kept a leg over his leg, and arm around his chest, and my face next to the side of his head. We stayed in that position, quietly snoozing until the radio went off again. The position was incredibly comfortable, but we both knew that Chad had to get to work. It was going to be a big day for him, so we needed to get moving. We slowly got out of bed and headed for the shower. With both showers running this time, we both got clean quickly.
I was just about finished with my shower when I felt Chad soaping my back. When I thought he was about finished, he moved to a side and reached an arm around me, pulling me to him, his warm semi-hard cock pushing against the side of one leg. While saying, “Why don’t we clean each other out; that way we can start the week clean inside and out,” he ran a set of soapy fingers down between my ass cheeks, finding my hole and massaging it some. I couldn’t help but moan and got a hard-on almost instantly. He continued to massage me, pushing a single finger and massaging my ass muscle with circular motions, then pushing in a second finger and massaging all that he could reach inside my ass including some light prostate massage.
I was in heaven from the massage, but Chad was a man with a mission. He slowly moved me backwards into his shower, pushed me to bend over, inserted the index finger from his other hand and pulled my ass open a little to let the water pour in. The water was warmer than usual, almost hot as it entered me. When it filled me, Chad wiggled his fingers around some, then pulled them out. The water in me felt good but I couldn’t hold it too long, so I squatted and let it all go down the drain. He repeated the process a second time, taking a little longer to massage me. I held the water a little longer, but still had to let it drain soon.
Chad washed his hands thoroughly and then reached to turn off his shower. I caught his hands before he turned off the water, looked him straight in the eyes, and said with a grin on my face, “Your turn.” He grinned sheepishly, knowing that I had caught him trying to avoid his turn. We shifted around in the shower, me against his side, arm around his front, with my hard-on pointed upward and pushed against the side of a leg. I soaped his back and down into his ass crack. I stopped at his hole and massaged him some. His reaction was about the same as mine: he closed his eyes, moaned lightly, and got hard quickly. I pushed a finger in and massaged his ass muscle in a circular motion, first one direction and then the other. His ass opened easily and I pushed a second finger in and massaged all around, especially around and on his prostate. After getting a few welcome moans and groans, I pushed Chad back into the shower, told him to bend over, put a third finger in to pull his ass open slightly, and let the water fill him. He couldn’t hold it long so he squatted and let it drain. I did the same thing to him a second time and he let it drain while I thoroughly washed my hands.
When Chad stood back up, I looked him in the eyes, took both hands and slowly pushed him against the shower wall, his hands held against the wall about shoulder height by my hands. I slowly pushed my hips into his, allowing our hard-ons to adjust their position so they were comfortable. Then I slowly moved my head forward toward his, stopping about an inch from his face. He tilted his head and moved to meet me, our lips touching in a tender kiss. While we kissed, I slowly let go of his hands and we moved our arms into our hugging position. The kissing grew more passionate, but soon we stopped.
I pulled away slightly from Chad and said, “I love you.”
Chad grinned and said, “I love you, too.” We kissed again, this time more tenderly than ever before. The effect on me was instantaneous: my eyes began to get tears in them because I was overwhelmed at how tender this guy next me could get. Although I hoped it would go unnoticed, Chad asked, “Is everything alright?”
I grinned through the tears and said, “Perfectly fine. I just got a little sappy, that’s all. I promise I won’t do that anymore.”
Chad grinned slightly and said, “That’s a promise I’ll never hold you to.”
I said, “Thanks. I wasn’t sure if I could keep it.” Then we both chuckled, because we both knew that I couldn’t keep the promise. After a short pause, I said, “I’m currently scheduled to take the day off today. Do you want me there?”
“It would be nice, but you don’t have to,” Chad responded.
I said, “Cool. Dress in some of my sweats today and I’ll wash everything of yours while you’re at work.”
Chad responded with a sly grin, “Sounds like a good plan to me.”
I immediately caught the implication and said, “Fuck you.”
“Tonight after I get back from work,” Chad said with a grin. “As for that hard-on of yours I feel below, don’t do anything without me.” I blushed and turned away. With a hand, he turned my face back to his. “Promise?” he asked.
“It’ll be difficult, but I promise,” I said. After looking at each other for another few seconds, I said, “Let’s get you out of here before we do anything else.” With that, we slowly broke our hug, got out of the shower, and dried off. He used my shaver while I found clothes for both of us to wear.
When I got back to the bathroom with clothes, Chad said, “You know your shaver sucks.”
I laughed because I knew he was right. “I’ve never found anything that I liked to replace it.” Then after a short pause, I said, “Besides it has some sentimental value. I bought it the week before my wife and I got married. That shaver is one of the few things from my life with a wife and kids that I don’t have packed away and out of sight.” Then the emotions kicked in. I got teary eyed and turned to walk away, when I felt Chad’s hand on my arm. He pulled me back to him and hugged me as I cried. Very quickly I realized that I really didn’t need to do this to Chad early on a Monday morning, especially on a day of meeting with customers. I pulled away from him somewhat and said, “Sorry, bud, don’t know where all these emotions are coming from. We really need to get you to work without all this extra stuff from me.”
I tried to pull away completely but Chad held me in place. As we looked at each other, he said, “Next weekend we need to talk more and screw less. We’re both kind of damaged right now, and we need to repair ourselves. You’re right when you say we need to talk through things. So next weekend, we tackle our pasts. Okay?”
I grinned to acknowledge what he’d said, then slowly leaned over and kissed him to let him know that I agreed. As I did it, I thought, “He’s taught me how to communicate without words. I wonder what else he’s going to teach me.”
When we got dressed, we realized that we’d certainly be able to tell my clothes from his: on Chad, my t-shirts were a little small across the chest and a little long, and the sweat pants were a little short. I was long-waisted and he wasn’t. It hadn’t made any difference in bed, but dressed we could certainly tell the difference.
We had cereal for breakfast and then Chad was ready to go. He got his cell phone out, turned it on, and put it in his pants pocket. Then he looked at me, grinned really big with a sparkle in his eye and headed for the front door. It was at that point I realized that I didn’t dread his leaving this time, but I was still looking forward to the next time we saw each other.
When we got to the front door, Chad’s cell phone beeped several times and then rang. “Geez, what’s the problem now?” he said as he pulled the phone out of his pocket. He answered the phone hesitantly. Although I couldn’t hear what was said, I did hear a female voice on the other end. He put a the other hand against the wall and leaned into it as he turned away from me. When he turned away, I noticed that he had closed his eyes.
The phone conversation continued for another two or three minutes, the voice on the other end sounding loud and hysterical some of the time, but generally quiet enough that I couldn’t really hear anything. I was torn: should I stay nearby so that I could provide support if he needed it or should I leave him alone so he could say anything he needed to say? I didn’t have a really good answer, so I lightly placed a hand on his back and left it there for a couple of seconds, then removed it and began to walk away. Much to my surprise, Chad quietly and quickly turned, grabbed my hand, and pulled it and my whole arm around him. I positioned my feet to support him and then slowly pulled him so that he leaned against me. During all of this, I got a quick look at his face. He had tears in his eyes, so I immediately knew that the call was from his ex-wife. As the call continued, I started to scratch his back to try to comfort him as he listened.
As the conversation continued even longer, I began to grow worried that Chad was getting drawn back to his ex-wife. Yes, I probably should have let him go and live a “normal” life, but I also didn’t want to let him go because he was now an important part of my life. However, I shouldn’t have worried because about that time he said, “Babe, I have to go to work. And with all the shit you’ve been through with this guy, I hate to have to say this. I’ve got another love in my life now, so I won’t be able to help you much anymore. Do you have someone there who can help you?” After a couple of seconds, he pulled the phone away from his ear, looked at it, and turned it off. He straightened up, looked at the phone and said, “The ex caught her new fiance in bed with another woman late last night, so she’s at a hotel. Needless to say, the engagement is off. She needs help, but when I said I couldn’t help, she hung up on me. I hope she can find someone else to talk to because I’m not sure I want to now.”
“Are you going to be okay?” I asked.
Almost instantly we fell into our standard hug, his left arm over my right, my left arm over his right. He hugged me tightly for several minutes, but didn’t cry this time. Over time he slowly pulled away from me. Our eyes met and we looked at each other for a long time.
“Are you going to be okay?” I asked again.
Looking at the floor, Chad quietly said, “I hate to use an old cliche, but this one fits. I’ve just closed a chapter in the book of my life. The ex will play a part in the next chapter, but the main characters will be you and me.” Then he looked at me, tears still in his eyes. He put his hand in the center of my chest, rubbed it around a little, and said, “I am so glad I’m here with you. Having someone to lean on makes all the difference in the world.”
With that statement, I knew everything was going to be fine, so I said, “Let’s get you out of here.” I opened the door and he walked out and trotted down the stairs. When he got to the front door of the condo building, he stopped, looked back up at me and flashed one of his megawatt grins. I couldn’t help myself from grinning broadly back at him. Then he opened the door and left.
I worked busily for the first half hour after Chad left, stripping and making the bed with clean pad and sheets, then collecting and starting a load of our laundry together. I got Chad’s gym bag and put on top of the dryer so that I could pack clothes directly into it. As I opened to see if anything else needed to be washed, I discovered my baseball cap inside his bag. I felt a warm feeling surround me as I held it, and then a small voice inside my head said, “You need to go to work today.” I probably wouldn’t have paid much attention to it, but the voice sounded like my wife’s voice. I felt the warmth surround me again. The small voice said, “You now have someone who loves you intensely. Support him and he will support you.” Then the voice said, “You can let us go now and close a chapter of your own. We’re here if you ever need us again, but we will come to you only when you’re alone.” The warmth continued and then it vanished. I felt a great void and began to cry almost uncontrollably. I missed my wife and kids terribly, and now that I had a new relationship I finally realized how much. The cry was a cleansing cry, releasing the pressure of the last year and a half, the months over which Chad and my relationship had built, Chad’s situation with his ex-wife, and the emotion-filled weekend.
When I finally regained some control over my sanity, I put the hat back into Chad’s gym bag and got ready to go to work. Although it was a Monday and I should have dressed in slacks, a nice shirt and a tie, I dressed in jeans, a nice shirt, and tennis shoes. It was my “day off” and I’d be damned if I was going to dress up for it. I waited around just long enough for the first load of laundry to get through the washer, then put it in the dryer and started a second load in the washer. After that, I gathered everything else and left for work.
As I drove into the parking lot, I saw Chad’s pickup truck near the front. Either he’d gotten lucky in finding a good spot or he’d moved quickly after leaving my place. Knowing Chad, my guess it was the latter. I found a spot a few rows back in about the same location as his, got my computer backpack out of the back seat, and went inside. While walking to my desk, I stopped to look through the glass in the corner of Chad’s cube. I caught his eye and he turned to look. First there was a look of surprise, followed by a one of Chad’s megawatt grins. I winked and continued to my cube.
As the morning continued, I kept busy. There was always too much to do. People lined up at the entrance to my cube to ask questions about various parts of the project and what to do next. It was kind of funny that no one seemed to notice the smile on my face all morning long. In a lull around 10:30, Chad quietly appeared in my cube. I followed his face as he entered my cube and sat down. His ass must have hurt like mine, because as he sat down, I noticed the quick wince. The wince made me hurt, but it also made me chuckle quietly. The quick, disgusted look I got from Chad implied, “Your fucking me did this.” The look gave way to one of Chad’s infectious, mega-watt grins which caused me to grin as well. The grin said, “I am very happy.” Soon the huge grin gave way to a serious look which said, “I love you.” Chad then did something I had not expected. He made a loose fist and slowly slid it halfway across my desk. The gesture had its intended effect on me: I immediately got teary-eyed and as I looked over at him, his eyes got the same glistening look. I made a loose fist and slid it across the desk to meet and touch his. The gesture soon became our private gesture for “We can get through this together.” After another short moment, he winked, we both chuckled, and he soon stood to leave. He looked back at me as he left, and then he was gone. I didn’t want him to leave, but both of us had lots of things to do. Looking back on the whole situation, I suddenly realized that he had finally gotten the message through to me: why spoil the silence when a look will do the same thing?
Chad and I left work at the same time that Monday, one of the few times in our relationship that we did. Nothing was said on the way out to the parking lot, and nothing needed to be said. We just liked being near each other. As we got close to his pickup, I said quietly, “See you soon?” He looked at me and said with a grin, “Sure.” I noticed how tired he looked and thought he needed a nap.
I got to the condo first and he followed soon after. I dragged him into the bedroom, had him strip down to his underwear, handed him a clean t-shirt, and said for him to take a nap. He resisted at first, but gave in quickly. While he slept, I did some work and then started dinner. He must have smelled the food because he silently came into the kitchen, crept up behind me, and unintentionally scared the shit out of me when he started to massage my shoulders. As I turned to fight him off, I found him completely naked. I started laughing and pulled him close, his cock rubbing against my cock through the sweat pants as we laughed and kissed. I got hard with him, but we had to postpone any ideas we may have had because dinner was ready. He got dressed, we had dinner, and then talked about the day until about 8pm when we decided to go to bed early. As usual, he was on top that night, the energy restored after he had taken his nap. Afterwards, we fell asleep for another good night’s sleep, this time until the alarm clock woke us. We could afford to be a little late to work on Tuesday, so we were. Needless to say, shower time was more fun than it had been on Monday morning.
That following weekend, Chad was true to his word. We got drunk and talked about our pasts, our wives, my kids, and what each of them meant to us. We both cried more than we ever had in our lives, but we got it out in the open so we could deal with it. As I found out that weekend, the visit from the “still, small voice” had truly been a turning point in my life. Yes, there would many more tear-filled moments when looking over the things that I had saved from my wife and kids, but I would never again cry as intensely as I had standing in front of the dryer that Monday morning.
Through November and December, our love continued to grow secretly. Because no one in our families knew about our situation, we spent Thanksgiving and Christmas with our own families, apart from each other but keeping in touch through our cell phones. Things would have stayed secret but his sister and my sister-in-law figured it all out way too quickly over the Christmas holidays. As we left my parent’s house after Christmas, my sister-in-law cornered me alone in a room, hugged me tightly and said quietly, “It’s good to see you happy again.” Unfortunately for Chad, it wasn’t as easy. His sister had found out about our age difference, and wasn’t too happy about it. But by mid-January, she finally realized how happy Chad was and let go of the issue. Luckily for both of us, they both kept their promise to stay quiet about the relationship until we had time to work out everything else.
Although Chad and I never again had as much sex in one weekend as we had in that first weekend, we did have a few rambunctious weekends from January through May that came close. Believe it or not, we also included Robert in a few of those weekends. But that’s a different story.
The first and only real storminess in our relationship happened in March. For Chad’s birthday, I surprised him by paying off the mortgage to his house. I thought I was doing him a favor and I wanted to invest my money in something (someone) worthwhile. However, Chad got so pissed off that he stormed out of the condo, went to his house, and wouldn’t answer my phone calls. When he showed up at the condo a couple of hours later, I tripped him so that he fell in the front hallway, pinned him and put all my weight on him, and forced him to talk to me. He finally told me that he wanted to do that on his own as an accomplishment he could say that he had done all by himself. I apologized to him and said that I never wanted to hurt him. He said that it was okay and that he’d finally worked it out in his own mind. Then he said that he had come up with an alternative: we had to sell our separate places and buy something together, but he wanted to make sure that he paid his half of the mortgage. The alternative was so agreeable to each of us that we moved quickly from the hallway floor to the bed and had each other multiple times over the next few hours.
In April, I met Suzanne, an incredible beauty that also had a double Ph.D. in Chemistry and Biology. Although Suzanne was a freaking genius, what most people saw was that luscious 36-24-34 figure of hers. She was a lot like Jennifer Anniston, only prettier and without the whiny personality. She had long brown hair that she styled differently each day of the week, and when she styled it up in a bun, she had a grace and elegance that took my breath away. As with most guys, I was in love with her from the first moment I saw her. But, alas, she already had a boyfriend. I also I found out she was in her mid-thirties, putting me out of the running because of the age difference; however, I did tell her that if she ever broke up with him, then we’d have to go have a cup of coffee together. We worked together on some projects, me and my team on the software to run the system, her on the content that went into the system. I was always fascinated with her incredible talent for finding and developing new information and experimental techniques, and how she could keep the rest of us so busy. On the side, when the relationship with her boyfriend got rough, I encouraged her to come to the club and work it out through exercise.
In May, Suzanne surprised me when she showed up at the club with a group of her female friends. I was standing at end of the front counter when she entered the club, and Chad and Robert were toward the middle. She spotted me, walked over to me, wrapped her arms around my shoulders, and kissed me lovingly on the cheek. As she pulled back from the kiss, she said, “I dumped my boyfriend yesterday. That means you and I have to go have that cup of coffee sometime.”
I responded quietly, “I’d love that.”
Then she pulled away completely from me, looked at Chad and Robert, and asked me, “And do you know these two fine gentlemen?”
I proudly said, “Yes I do. The guy on the left is Chad. He and I are co-workers, and we both work out here on Fridays.”
Suzanne grinned at Chad, extended her hand to shake his, and said, “My, aren’t you the cute one.” Chad immediately turned a bright red color, shook her hand, and said, “Nice to meet you. Jim’s told me about the work you do.” I noticed that he kept his lower body mostly turned toward the counter. When I looked closer, I noticed that his shorts were tenting noticeably in the front. I would certainly have to joke with him about that later.
“The guy on the right is Robert. He’s one of the managers here. Every now and then I get to beat him in a game of racquetball.”
As Suzanne turned to Robert and extended her hand, Robert stood there dumbfounded. I had never seen Robert at a loss for words and I had to work really hard to prevent my grin from turning into laughter. Since I was standing at the end of the counter and could easily see behind it, I saw that Robert’s shorts were also noticeably tented. I cleared my throat and that seemed to break Robert’s trance. He reached over and shook Suzanne’s hand. They held the handshake a little longer than I expected and then Robert said, “Good to meet you. I’m also one of the owners of the club as well.”
I shot a quick look of total surprise to Chad, and he looked back at me with the same look. Here we’d been screwing around with one of the owners of the club for a while, and we didn’t even know it. But it all made sense when I looked back at the dedication Robert showed to the club. (We also found out later that Robert had an MBA, so he really wasn’t the dummy that he portrayed sometimes. That also made sense when I realized how successful the gym was.)
When we got into my car after exercising that Friday evening, Chad asked why I didn’t pursue something with Suzanne. When I said, “All I need and want is in the other guy in this car,” I must have said the right answer because that led to one of those weekends where we never got enough of each other, whether on top or bottom.
Robert and Suzanne quickly became “an item.” Every time I talked to Robert about their relationship, he blushed. Obviously they were good together in bed. Once he confided that they’d had more sex in the previous weekend than he and I had in that wonderful July weekend together. However, about two months later, Suzanne and I had that cup of coffee together and she told me a little different story. Apparently for the past couple of weeks, Robert was having problems keeping it up, so their physical relationship (but not their love for each other) had cooled somewhat. Suzanne wasn’t at all happy when I laughed out loud. As we talked, I finally weaved into the conversation that Robert liked his prostate to be massaged and doing so “recharged” him. She wanted to know how I knew that and I explained hesitatingly, hoping that it wouldn’t destroy their relationship. As I explained, she asked more questions and seemed to be genuinely interested. Then she got embarrassed as she asked another question: although she knew all about the anatomical features of a guy, she wasn’t sure what to do and how to do it. After I explained, she did something totally unexpected: she asked if we could surprise Robert sometime so I could give her a “live tutorial” on what to do. After stammering for a few moments, I replied that I’d be pleased to. With Chad’s permission, a few weekends later, I got to give that tutorial to Suzanne on a tied-up and gagged Robert. Although Robert was initially pissed at what I had told Suzanne, he soon realized that what I had done would be of intense pleasure to him for many years. The results of that evening were “explosive” in many ways, but that too is a different story.